


Magenta Cream

by fuckusernamesbitch



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, Also it switches between perspectives a lot but you’ll catch on, Alternia isn’t super dangerous and shit in this, BDSM, Comforting a mentally unstable fucker with SEX, Confusion, Dave’s a stalker, Depression, Eating Disorder, Emotional Rollercoaster, Fluff, Gamzee x Karkat - Freeform, Gamzee’s a good protective boyfrand, Gamzee’s so into Karkat it’s not even funny, Highs and Lows, ITS SO SEXUAL, Idk I’ll add more to it as the story progresses, I’m years late in writing this but fuck it the fandom shall NEVER DIE, Karkat’s just trying his best, M/M, Mental Illness, Murder, Non-Canonical, OOC, Realization, Red Romance, Romance, Sadism, Self Harm, Shit’ll get kinkier as it progresses, Smut, Sober Gamzee, There’s lotsa feeeelings, They’re angsty, Ups and Downs, and other stuff, au headcannon, clownkar, gamkar - Freeform, im sorry lmao, it’s more chillaxed, just Gamkar crap, just what you fuckin want bitch, like life, lustful ass feelings, matesprits, new feelings, obviously, only not really, otp, possible trigger warning, sappy ass feelings, shit’ll also get more emotional as it progresses, so is karkles, voices in Gamzee’s head, ya knoooooow whats up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-05-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:29:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 41,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23425537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuckusernamesbitch/pseuds/fuckusernamesbitch
Summary: Sexual Gamkar AU OTP crap. Don’t know when I’ll finish itI wrote most of this while I was drunk lmfao and looking back, I’m cringing but hope y’all enjoy it anyway .-.
Relationships: Gamzee Makara/Karkat Vantas, gamkar
Comments: 10
Kudos: 46





	1. Confusion

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so lemme explain somethin to you right off the bat.... this is an AU fanfic and it’s non-canonical, it’s made up, like a lot of fanfics are. Anyway, enjoy and if you don’t, that’s cool too, we all have our own preferences :o)

Karkat slowly approached the door to Gamzee’s hive. 

Instantly, he caught on to something. ...Something wasn’t right. Fear struck a cord through his piercing brain, riddled with nervousness for a few moments, overwhelming his senses into an almost coma-like state, before he quickly snapped the fuck out of it. “You’re fine, everything’s fine. But what the FUCK?” He said aloud, reassuring himself, before he cracked the door open, not bothering to knock, because something told him that Gamzee would not open it for him. Besides, they were fucking moirails. And it’s not like Gamzee was very proper. He took a step inside, lifting his hand away from the door handle, slowly, whilst shutting the door. It was quiet, and there was an eerie chill to the air. Faygo cans and sopor tins were splain before Karkat’s eyes as soon as he entered, scattered around in a not-so-orderly fashion. Figures. Damn, he really should pick up after himself. That wasn’t important right now, though.

“Gamzee?” Karkat calls out, as he slowly approaches his room.

The door is cracked, and inside, you hear a moan. Or a groan. A combination of both, actually. Shivers engulf your spinal cord in a eerie manner but you trudge forward anyway. It sounded...odd. You open the door wider, and see purple blood on his walls, with a bunch of happy and sad clown faces. Oh, no. You don’t see him, so you move in closer to see better. You look around, still nothing. Then you get a chill down your spine. Cold. You stop in your tracks. You feel breath on your neck. Shivers. This motherfucker just creeped up on you.  
“Heeey, best friend....” he says, carrying his words out in a peculiar manner, almost like he was stoned, but his voice had an edge to it. You shiver again. As he opens his mouth, his snakey tongue finds it way to your ear, and he licks in an upward motion. You twitch a bit.  
“What the fuck?” You say, as you turn to face him. His eyes hold fury in them, sober and violent. He towers over you, and you can’t help but let out a squeak as he smiles in a wicked, creepy way. He’s so fucking tall... he’s a highblood, and his eyes look like he wants to devour something. His teeth are so fucking sharp. They kind of fit his face, though. He looks kind of... beautiful. Wait, what? Since when did you think of him as beautiful? His eyes tear holes into you. But you won’t back down in cowardice. He’s your moirail. Instead, you clear your throat, trying to maintain a calm demeanor.

You spew out, with a hint of venom, from shock, “WHAT THE FUCK, GAMZEE?”  
You shouted it a little louder than you intended, starting to get agitated. “DID YOU FORGET TO EAT A PIE TODAY OR SOMETHING? WHY ARE YOU FUCKING SOBER AGAIN?”  
You stare up at him, and he just... chuckles.  
Gamzee snakes toward you fast, closing the distance pretty much entirely, and grabs you... wrapping his long fingers around your smaller shoulders. His hands feel cold, even through your shirt. You wince. Your eyes trail down his body, and to his shoulders. You notice a few cuts on his left arm, leaking purple. Inside, your heart drops. You start to feel fucking ill. Your brain goes into overdrive. Fear starts to overcome you. Your eyes start to widen with anger and confusion and all these other emotions you can’t even fucking comprehend right now. What the actual fuck. Why would he do this?! You start to breathe really fast. He senses your timidity. Through his violet irises, flashed something utterly terrifying. You stammer on your words. They catch on your throat, you can’t speak. You see so much malice in his gaze. You feel it piercing into your soul. ....But then it left.  
“Aw, now.... don’t be motherfuckin frightened up in here, best friend.... my pale bro....” his voice sounds odd, like there’s enmity to it, but.... sweetness... and an underlying amount of.... fuck, something. You couldn’t place your finger on it. But... It was weird.  
He presses his lips to your ear, and whispers, “I’m not gonna fuckin hurt you...” and his breath in your ear causes you to shiver. Then he fucking nips at your earlobe. Seriously, what the shit?! You push him back a little, and he growls low in his throat, his long, honed fangs glistening in the dark, traces of purple on his tongue. Like he fucking tasted it.  
“Gamzee,” you say, in a softer tone, trying to keep your cool, “what’s going on with you right now? You fucking bulgelicker...” your voice can’t help but tremble slightly.  
Gamzee just chuckles again. Then, he opens his mouth, to speak, you presume. Your chest flutters with anxiety for a moment as he extends his tongue up and out of his mouth to move it in a swirl on his lips. You’ve backed up from him a bit. He edges toward you again. Doesn’t want you to be too far. Why?  
“Ain’t nothin motherfuckin WRONG, brother... I’m doin fine... just a lil hungry, is all...” his voice shifting makes you uncomfortable. He looks you in the eye and grins deviously. “Why, my little invertebrother? Heh... are ya scared?”

You gulp. His voice sounds almost.... seductive. It was giving you confusing emotions. What the fuck was he doing.  
“N-no...” your breath hitches in your throat, this angered you, and you spoke up, this time with much more force. “NO. I’m not fucking scared. I just want to know what’s gotten into you. You’re acting a little stranger. You didn’t fucking eat that brain rotting sopor slime, did you? You’re a mess. I told you to fucking take care of yourself. And what the fuck,” you say, grabbing onto his wrist gently, starting to work yourself into a frenzy, “is this? Did you fucking cut yourself? You’re fucking BLEEDING, Gamzee.” Four diagonal lines.

Gamzee growled again but didn’t attack you, nor did he pull away. Instead, he just got closer, his lips inches apart from yours. The scent of his breath infesting your nostrils.  
“The demons in my head were gettin to be too much for a motherfucker.... I had to exorcise them a lil.. fuck, I’m sorry, Karbro.” He seemed a little hurt. But there was something more to his vibe right now, the talk about his cuts could wait. It still fucking pains you, though. You reach up to touch his face and try to pap him, because you really wanted to just have him relax so he could have a feelings jam with you and hug you while he cries and tells you why he self destructed. But he grabs your wrist and shoves your hand down. 

“Ain’t no need for that, motherfucker... because I’ve got a better idea. A much more wicked design has infected this motherfuckin thinkpan.” He pulls you close to him, so your leg is touching his crotch, and he grinds into your leg once, just to see how you react. He looks you in the eyes... fearful as they were.

Your heart drops in your stomach. You feel like you’re going to be fucking sick. Your mind is going in all directions, fight or flight, do this, do that. To be or not to be? But even though a part of you is scared shitless, you don’t try to pull away. And as he tilts your chin up even more with his hand that isn’t holding your waist, he fucking presses his lips to yours. Only slightly chapped, not very bad at all... firm, full of ferocity, and yet, quite gentle. You hesitate into the kiss at first, because WHAT THE FUCK, but the way his tongue prods at your bottom lip, demanding entrance, makes you sigh and give in. Soon you kinda find yourself kissing him with passion, and even sooner, you’re wrapping your arms around his neck as you gasp for air before he starts kissing on your neck. “W-what the f-fuck are you doing, f-fuckass....we still need to talk.” you stammer out, something tells you to run away, or push him away, because what the hell are you and your clearly insane palemate even doing right now, but you just can’t.

You hate to admit it, but it feels... really good. And you gasp again as his teeth graze that sensitive part of your neck before he suddenly, without warning, grabs you and picks you up and fucking thrusts you into the wall, not hard enough to hurt you too bad, but enough to feel out of breath for a moment. At first, you’re terrified that he’s going to cull your ass. You instinctively wrap your legs around his waist and your heart drops again as you feel his bulge pressing into your thigh.

“Mmmm... you like that, best friend?” He growls through tangles of your neck in his teeth. You let out a whine and he takes that as a yes, so he snickers into your neck before slithering a hand down your body, looking you in the eyes again. They are filled with lust. His hands rest above your bulge, teasing you, before he gropes it through your pants. It sends a jolt of electricity throughout your body. You let out a moan, not really knowing why. You instantly regret it. Fuck. Is this actually fucking happening right now? What the fuck. But, sneaky little fuck that he is, finds your throat with his tongue before you can even complain, all while he strokes your cock through your pants before he hooks a finger under the waistband of your dark grey skinny jeans. They weren’t so tight that it was hard for him to get access to your bulge and your nook was secreting red fluids already. Holy shit.  
He breaks the kiss as he slowly unthreads the ties of his polka dotted pajama bottoms. You were nervous as fuck, but he didn’t just whip it out, he just kind of made it known. No biiig deeeal.  
You had no idea why this was even happening, honestly. Sure, you may have been a little fucked up the last time you hung out, and you may or may not have breathed in his scent a little too long when you were feeling nauseous. So, I guess it’s possible you may have let out a little noise of pleasure. You totally didn’t drool on his shirt. Gonna be honest. But... He held you gingerly and told you “it’s okay, best friend. It’s alright...” while stroking your back. Ah, so gingerly. Well, long story short, he somehow convinced you to eat a bit of fucking sopor with him. You don’t know why you ever even fucking did that. Curiosity? I mean, you HAVE to wonder why he’s so damn happy on it all the time. But... Did he catch on to that or something, though? He smelled delicious. It wasn’t your fucking fault you had too much. You weren’t used to that stuff. Damn. Cut yourself some slack.

Gamzee chuckled as he slips his hand fully inside your pants, you gasp at the sudden contact. He snickers again, kisses you again, very hungrily, his hand slowly moving down past your bulge, running a finger over your nook. His finger was chilly, but maybe that’s just because your nook was fucking radiating heat. He presses into you again and holds your throat with his other hand while he snakes his tongue along your collarbone. You let out a frustrated moan. These feelings were taking over your brain, making you want to beg him and shit. Goddamn it. Somehow he caught on to that.  
“All hot n bothered, huh? Got a lot of pent up frustration what needs to be let the fuck out...” you grind up against his finger as he allows another to rub at your nook before slowly, carefully, pressing inside of you. The sudden entrance and his wicked eyes freaks you out in the best way. Holy shit. Good thing his nails weren’t too sharp. Gasping, you call him an asshole under your breath as he starts a rhythm. He lifts your shirt up and over your head and you huff at him through your little moans because this fucker is fully dressed and you’re practically exposed over here. Such a fucking douchebag.  
With one hand, he successfully gets your shirt off and tosses it god knows where. His fingers dance around inside your body a few more moments, before he pulls them out abruptly and grabs the waistband of your jeans again. This time full force. He rips them all the way down to your feet but your shoes prevent them from coming off fully. So he rips off your fucking shoes along with your pants and undergarments, leaving you fully exposed. You feel so flushed and embarrassed, goddamn it. But then he speaks.  
“Goddamn, you’re so motherfuckin....” he reaches his hand towards your bulge and strokes it, “beautiful, Karkat... a pure fuckin miracle.” You say fuck it, throw all that quadrant bullshit out of your brain, and wrap your arms around him again and kiss him with such force it could about knock him over. He moans into your mouth and your nook gets wetter.  
“Well, if you’re going to fucking molest me... at least take your fucking clothes off, you nookstain.” You hiss into his mouth, before he smirks and says, “don’t hafta tell me twice...” so... yeah, he lifts his shirt off, but he hesitates when he’s about to pull his bottoms off. His eyes get darker, more ferocious, he grinds his hard bulge on your nook, leaving red stains on his bottoms. Teasing you. Making you let out frustrated little whines. His voice is full of lust and something dark, it honestly scares you but you’re too aroused to be anxious. “You want me to take my fucking clothes off, huh? You want me to...” he grinds up against you again and you melt. He didn’t have to finish his sentence. He was teasing you on purpose. He wanted you to beg for him. Smug asshole.  
“Fuck... goddamn you.... asshole.... yes...” you moan into his neck. It sends shivers throughout Gamzee’s body and he peels them off, exposing himself, not very shy about it, his erection bouncing up and down for a moment, leaking purple from the tip... whoa.... uh... damn. He breaks your trance, grabs you by your ass, squeezes it while he moves his head down, sucking at your stomach, licking trails up to your neck, before he moves back down, starts kissing, and biting... you gasp again and fist your hand into his wild hair as he moves down even further, avoiding your bulge on fucking purpose and biting your inner thighs.  
Seriously, what a fucking asshole. His hands move up to your waist and he digs his nails in, but not enough to hurt. Wouldn’t wanna damage you... holy fuck. Electric jolts.... everywhere. Fuck. Suddenly he stops being so gentle and fucking grabs you in a quick flash, and pulls you into him, before you can even really register what he just did.  
He lets out an aroused hiss as he pulls you up onto him by your waist and teases your hole with his cock, making you whine, before he pushes, giving you a toothy grin, looking you in the eyes, goofy but hot, and smug as fuck, and he enters you. Oh, fuck. The feeling of the entry sends your body into ecstasy and you gasp again, before letting out a hungry moan, grabbing onto him and burying your face into his collarbone. Breathing heavily. Squirming. Begging internally. Just starts fucking you on the floor. No big deal. He snakes one hand up by your shoulder and grips you while his other hand moves down past your waist and to your ass, holding you firmly but not too tight that it reduces the sensations. He starts to thrust upwards, and you grip onto him as hard as you can, not even caring about anything else anymore. The way he moves inside you is so... exquisite, it sends this feeling into your chest and throat that just won’t come out no matter how loud you start to scream. And the sounds he makes.... goddamn, he sounds so wrecked. His mouth his fucking hanging open on your shoulder, panting, his tongue dancing on your skin but he’s too busy thrusting to bite into you because he’s moaning and it feels so good, holy shit.... you move your head out of his collarbone after you graze your teeth along it and lift his head off of your shoulder as you’re bouncing on his cock. Eye contact combined with this unexplainable feeling just makes you want to cum. Cum everywhere, all over him, but you don’t, because you want to savor this....  
His eyes are so full of lust, it looks like he isn’t even in this realm anymore, and you know yours are just as gone. He moves in to kiss you passionately, as you moan into each other’s mouths, smug ass sucking your tongue down his throat as he moves his other hand that was gripping your back down to your ass and without warning lifts you up so you’re not on the floor anymore, still inside you, pushing in deeper, but he stopped thrusting for a second, just to tease you. You craved more. He bites into your neck again as you wrap your legs around his waist to keep him inside.  
“Gam...” he fucking smiles at how you say his name but doesn’t fucking say anything back. He just smiles and chuckles like a little shit. How did he know how to be such a fucking tease? You move down so he’s all the way in as he carries you over to the bed, setting you down on the edge, sideways on the bed, and thrusting once into you to make you moan before you look up at him, and shiver out, “asshole...” he grins at you and grabs your hips.  
“Yeah... but you like it, don’t you?”  
Your legs, as if instinctively, wrap around his waist again. It’s like you didn’t even have to think about doing it, it just happened. He moves his head down to your stomach and nips it before he trails his tongue down and licks your bulge a few times, sucking on the tip and making you leak a little, before he pulls back, your genetic fluid on his tongue, a smirk on his face and he swallows it, and he starts to fuck you again. You instantly grasp at the sheets and tear into them as he plows into you, his thumbs on your hip bones and the rest of his hands on your ass, holding you so firmly, pressing into your skin so you can’t slide away. Like he needs this. You feel like a bitch in heat and you’re moaning again, loudly, you’ll admit... and every time he thrusts inside of you, it intensifies, and you get so much louder. He’s basically sliding your entire body back and forth, and into his cock. Messing up the sheets. Just like a little ragdoll. You can’t even form words but you fucking try, it just comes out sounding wrecked and pathetic but it just turns him on even more, knowing he’s making you feel so good you actually can’t talk. Getting you to shut up is rare. Not that you were really being quiet, though. He leans down again, still thrusting and lets one hand grasp at your throat while he fucks you, peeling your lips apart with his own, through a frenzy of very aroused moans and screams and begs, and pleas, “p-please, harder...”, he kisses you so passionately you’d melt if you weren’t already completely gelatinous. His teeth graze your bottom lip before he nips at your jawline, you gasp, he trails his lips down hungrily and sucks on your neck, simultaneously digging his claws into your ass with the hand that isn’t on your throat, while his mouth is bruising you in the best way, marking you. His tongue dancing on your skin, his teeth biting into you, sucking in. You are digging your claws into his back and screaming his name. Shit. He really likes that. He likes that a lot. You’re amazed he’s even lasted this long, but you’re not complaining. Not. At. All.

He pulls away, looking you in the eye, giving you a crazy, toothy grin, before he grabs you again by the waist, pulling you up, sitting you upright, wet insides sliding down onto his cock with ease, all the way down to the hilt. You moan his name again, and practically melt right into him, going limp. Your arms lazily wrap around his neck, and you look him in the eye. Teeth are dancing on your jaw again. Licking and biting at your sensitive skin. You start riding him, up and down, instinctually, not even giving a shit how embarrassing it was to do that at this point. You needed to feel this. His lips pressed to your neck again. His breath is hitching in your ear. His voice is hungrily growling your name, and telling you how delicious you are. His hands tracing the scars on your back. Inside of you completely. You feel so full. He pulls your head back by your hair and licks your neck to your chin sensually, teasingly, smirking and then biting his lip as you start to increase your pressure and pace before his lips spread apart to let out moans. Goddamn, they sounded so sexy. So hungry. Insatiable. He leans back up against the wall and slumps a little bit but not too much, going a little limp himself, as he guides you up and down. You reach your arms up to the wall for balance, your hair touching his bangs, sweaty and dripping, your breath beating against his face. You dare to look up at him. You feel like you’re in an entirely different dimension, as he helps move you up and down, bouncing on his dick while looking you in the eyes with his dumb, goofy, but strangely hot grin. He reaches up and grabs both of your wrists and pulls them down and just holds them tight against yourself as you continue to ride him. He likes to make you feel bound.

“Come a little closer, you sexy little fuck...” he moans out, and you obey, leaning forward into the kiss he had prepared for you. Twisting your tongues together and sucking your lips together so loudly and harshly, your teeth hit his. Between a mess of teeth and tongue and lips, you hear him say “mmmmyeah...” and just like that, he starts to thrust into you again, nails digging into your skin, causing slight tears in your flesh. You let out a surprised whimper into his hungry, feasting mouth. Electricity jolts through your insides and off your tongue in a passionate frenzy. You almost break the kiss from how gone you are, wanting to keel over a little from the intense pleasure, but he holds you in. Locking you in. He pulls your arms around to your back and holds them together by your wrists with one hand while his other finds your throat again. He really likes to choke you. Your eyes are practically rolling back into your skull at this point and every moan you let out is sending a jolt through your entire body combined with the penetration. It just doesn’t fucking stop, it won’t stop, ah, it keeps getting better and better... Your tongue lolls out into his mouth and you don’t have enough strength to even kiss him back, because.... fuck.... this feels so...fucking....amazing....  
“A-ahhhhh.....~” you continuously let out these sounds, flying through outer space while riding a dick. Heh.  
He sees your limp tongue as an advantage and sucks on the tip. You can almost feel the shivers emanating off of him. He pulls his cock out of you only to thrust it back in as hard as he can, and you fucking scream, as you feel his thick cock wracking your entire body. He squeezes your neck so good as he breathes into your mouth, his teeth lingering over you, trying his best to control his maniacal moans. Trying his best to control the urge to make you bleed and drink it up.  
“Mmmm, don’t st-stifle.....ahhh, let... it....out.....aAHHHH!~” you are so fucking gone. 

He chuckles in between his moans. “Mmm, I like how insatiable you sound, best friend...” thrusts in as hard as he can, squeezes tighter on your throat, ah, eyes roll back again, sheets are ripped apart, “I like it when you let your little freak out... didn’t know you’d want me to fuck you so badly... dirty, dirty, dirty...”  
He tries to pull out again, but your nook tightens around his cock and sucks him back in, not letting him leave. So he bangs into you as hard as he can until you feel like you’re going to explode. Your bulge shoots out red fluid everywhere, all over your stomach, all over his thighs and chest, some even gets on his bottom lip and he just licks it off with a satisfied smirk like the disgusting pervert he is. He looks so devilish and proud that you are literally on ecstasy because of him. Fuckin smug ass jerk! He fucks into you still, your nook and his appendage making disgusting, delicious slapping sounds from how wet you are. In unison, fitting together like two pieces of a puzzle. Making you moan out his name with every thrust. You’re practically crying now, from how good this feels. Tears are literally streaming down your face. “O-ooohhh....mmmyy....g-gooodd....” you say repetitively, almost unable to comprehend anything you were saying out loud.

Your nook grips onto his delicious cock until it can’t take it anymore, and quite frankly, neither can he. God, it feels so warm and tasty inside of you. His arms find their way to your back, digging in, gripping you tightly. He pulls you so close to him, licks the tears from your face as he releases inside of you, and lets out a moan as loud as you’ve ever heard while you scream his name again,  
“f-fu...uck....G-Gam-z-z-eee...ahhhh~” spewing more fluid, from your nook, this time. Cumming again... this one feels better than the first. It’s rare for you to have an orgasm from the inside. Holy shit. You shiver as it combines with his cum, leaking out of you and creating such a pretty color.  
His face drops down to your skin, panting against you, currently nuzzled into your shoulder as he gasps for air, and, my god, you never realized how fucking adorable and hot he was. How intoxicating he was. How beautiful his vulnerability was... you had no idea this would ever happen. Are you red for each other? Whatever. It doesn’t matter right now. Not when he’s trembling against you, moaning unintelligible words... panting so heavily as you do the same. He trails his fingers up to your face and kisses your collarbone gently before he raises his head and looks at you. His eyes are so pretty. He grins sluggishly, licks his lips in a satisfied manner.  
“M...miraculous... as it can get, brother...” he struggles to say those words. Fuckin dork.

He chuckles, his pupils still dilated with lust. Gamzee felt calmed down now. He looked at Karkat, how beautiful and flushed his pretty little face was. How there was saliva dripping from his chin from how good it felt. Little fucker didn’t even try to wipe it off. Maybe he didn’t realize it was there.  
Ah... How he savored every drop of intimacy you pounded into him. Holy motherfucking shit. You just fucked the shit out of your best friend. Really, reaaally hard. And goddamn, you loved it. Every motherfucking MOMENT. You look down at the mess you both have made. Red and purple fluid is everywhere, staining the sheets. You kiss him again, this time more gently, without tongue. Still hungrily, though. You savor the tiny little huffs he lets out and the way he tastes. The way his lips fit perfectly with yours. How his body fits perfectly with yours. Wow. You make out a lil, fluttering feelings in your throat and chest, your ears flattening submissively as you let out a wrecked sound, before he sighs in contentment from his orgasms and falls onto your bed.... pulling away from your lips. He was like a drug.  
You can’t help but chuckle. “Damn, best friend, that was bitchtits as fuck.” You try to joke playfully but you meant every word. He groans, flips you off weakly, and calls you an idiot. His voice sounds so wrecked. It almost gets you hard again. Heh.  
You study his face, the symmetry, the lines of his jaw, his cute little nose. How his chest rises and falls. The edges and curves. His body is so pretty. Your little Karkat is so beautiful. Pale, red, whatever.... you always admired how adorable he was. So small and angry, yet so caring and full of love. Now he’s so naked... so vulnerable. You’ve fantasized about fucking him for a long time. You never thought he’d feel the same, though. So you’d just do little gestures, tease him a little more, linger a little longer... call him more often. You weren’t sure if he caught on to it or not. You thought you were subtle as fuck. Sopor made you have more self control. Poison. All the times he has been around that you’ve just wanted to tell him how beautiful he looks when his nose scrunches up when he’s yelling at a romcom, not seeing how you’re staring at him, with your head resting on one hand on the arm of the couch, your lips curled into a dazed, toothless grin. Your eyes glazed over with some weird ass feelin. All the times his scent has made your pants grow a little tighter, and you’d have to shove your hands in your pockets. How you’d stay up later than usual thinking about how hard you’d ravage him, cumming all over yourself in the shower, watching the purple fluid flow down the drain so you’d forget it was released with the thought of him in mind.  
You could take a chunk out of him right now or strangle him to death while you FUCK HIM AGAIN. Over and OVER and over and OVER. Little sweet, sexy mutant. Tastes like candy. He’d be so shocked, he’d struggle underneath you and try to make you stop but he’d be a moaning mess as you pound into him over and OVER and over again. How delightful that sounds. Make him so motherfuckin submissive. Make his eyes roll back into his head and make him dribble without even noticing again... his legs wrapping around you, holding you in, crying out “Gamzee...~” while you make him cum. Cum all over ya. Give him one last orgasm as his final breath leaves his body. Paint the walls with his beautiful candy red blood. You wonder if you could bake his blood into a pie. Or put a couple drops in ya Faygo. You’d definitely motherfuckin put his blood on your own body and masturbate in it. Use it as lube. Smother your face with it and taste it over and over. Masticate his bones and poof that shit in your face. But nah. No fuckin way would you ever do that. EVER. He’s your favorite troll all up and on this motherfuckin planet. Karkat is a treasure and he helps keep you sane when you feel yourself slipping away. And fucking him senseless felt better than little paps... The paps and shooshes were still the shit, though. You’d take those any day. They felt so fuckin amazin.

Ah, Karkat. Most motherfuckin righteous of brothers. Perfect. About a foot shorter than you, small hands, soft skin, his beautiful fiery eyes. His ferocity despite his size. His ability to calm a brother down. Sweetest motherfucker you ever did meet. Might motherfuckin beat some ass, but he also has the biggest heart you ever done witnessed up in this righteous ass bitch. Fuckin magical, your Karkat.  
Feeling the surge of weak limbs from orgasmic release, you collapse onto the bed as well. “Fuck, that was beautiful, bro.”  
Your body was tingly and felt like you were soaring in the clouds or some shit. You weren’t entirely sure of what the fuck was all up and going on right now, but you didn’t mind. Not when you think about how wet and tight his nook was, and how he begged for more even when you were going as hard as you could manage. So fast and deep inside... how his fingers tangled into parts of you, his breath in your ear...  
Little fucker may be small, but he sure can take it. You chuckle softly. You’re glad you went for it, to say the least. You’re in awe at the fact that he was so into it. So into you... mmm. He was way more into you than you thought, that’s for damn sure. The way his legs immediately wrapped around you like you were the air he needed to breathe... like you were the smoke that filled his lungs and got him high. Like you were water and he was a motherfuckin fish. Shit was crazy. Fuckin miracles..... seriously, bro. 

Gamzee slumped beside you. Your insides tingled after he pulled out and it was still lingering. You could still feel remnants of him inside you. Goddamn, he fucked you so hard. You could’ve sworn you were seeing stars or some shit. Between your orgasmic relief and your lust, you feel a little odd about why this happened. Slightly worried about what you two technically were now, and even more fucking shocked by the fact that you never pulled away when he tested his boundaries. You just let him ravage you. It was one of the best feelings you’ve experienced. The way he touched you, causing your nerve endings to go haywire.... you shiver. You’re still blown away and you seriously can’t get over it... Suddenly his arm is wrapping around you.  
“You’re so beautiful...” you hear him say quietly, his voice in a daze. It sounded like music to your ears. He’s so sweet sometimes. ...most of the time. You shiver again and moan softly because suddenly everything he says or does turns you on right now. Because... you knew he was right. You pull him close, wrap your leg around his torso, and rest your face in his chest. Smells so... delicious, surprisingly. You find yourself kissing it and sucking on it weakly, just to get the flavor.  
FUCK. Shit. You’re hooked. And as his arms wrap around you protectively, pulls you in even more, his hands cupping and squeezing your ass like you’re his prize, making low, soft, aroused but sleepy noises in his throat at the touch of your lips on his chest, you feel yourself die inside a little. Gamzee sniffs your hair, you feel his breath go down your neck, and he nuzzles you. Fuck. You are Karkat Vantas, and you are fucked.


	2. Clean-up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is gonna be the worst chapter ever because I fuckin SUCK at domestic shit and this chapter is pretty normal I feel, so yeah. I couldn’t just have Karkat leave Gamzee’s place without fuckin showerin. Gros >:o) lmao this is super awkward though like I didn’t know what the fuck to put here. The other chapters shall be better heheh

You wake up with a groan. Ugh, you’re all fucking covered with dried genetic material. You didn’t clean yourself afterwards. Gross. It’s all over your clothes and.... oh, shit, AFTERWARDS. What the FUCK happened? Oh, shit! Right. You remember everything so vividly. Going to Gamzee’s hive. The eerie chills. Then he.... oh god. You had sex with your moirail. Whoa. Is that a bad thing? You think about him inside you and how he completely dominated your bitch ass. You groan and facepalm. Goddamn it, why did you have to be attracted to this fuckin clown. Oh, shit. Holy shit. You just realized something. That was your first time having sex with another. You just lost your fucking virginity to Gamzee Fucking Makara. Your moirail, your supposed palemate. A psychotic, unstable, freaky ass, weird clown. You look over at him sleeping beside you, he forgot to wash his stupid facepaint off. It was smeared as fuck. You study his face. You feel a pang of something inside your chest. You shouldn’t feel too bad about it. He was so beautiful. Even with his smeared makeup. He looked so attractive, his breath even, his chest rising and falling, his head resting on his hand, his crazy messy hair falling in his eyes. You lean over and get closer to his face. You reach for his hair. You put a couple strands of it behind his ear and stroke it a few times. It was so messy. Kinda soft, though, surprisingly. You feel a twinge in your chest again and your crotch has a tiny jolt of pleasure but it’s gone in a flash. You bite your lip. Fuck. Goddamn, you were actually glad it was him. It felt so right. He feels for your hand and he reaches out, half asleep, and pulls you down close to him, curling you into a little spoon, facing him. He opens his eyes slowly. You look into his eyes, as they widen a little. He reaches his hand up to your face, all sappy and shit, and kisses your forehead. You flush red on your cheeks. What the fuck, seriously. Why’s he being so affectionate. Not that you’re complaining. You kind of.... really like it. You sigh contentedly and close your eyes, leaning into him and purring softly. He giggles. Fucking giggles. And it’s the cutest, stupidest giggle ever. Jesus. This idiot. This cute fucking idiot.

“Your makeup’s all fucked up, jackass. And we’re PLASTERED in cum. Fucking sick, man, we need to fucking change, and change the sheets. Fuck.” You say in your usual slightly agitated manner, but he pays it no mind, as usual. Your ways of being never bothered him any. Instead, he just chuckles. He rises up, and looks down at your crotch. Then his. Then he giggles again. Fucking retard.

“Aw, shiiit, man. We sure as shit are.” He fucking bursts out laughing, holding his sides. He’s so cute. Goddamn it. He just about falls face over in a dried pile of his own jizz. You grab onto him to keep him from falling. He realizes this and looks at you, still laughing. You let out a little laugh yourself.

“Shiiiiit, Karbro. We should use the ablutions block or somethin. Fuck.”

“Uh, yeah, jackass, we definitely should. This shit is filthy. It’s fucking gross. And there’s SO MUCH OF IT.” He bursts out in laughter again and falls on his back. Not in the cum, thank god. He was still fucking nude. And you realized, you were, too. You prepare to get up and wash yourself, but he fucking grabs you and pulls you down on top of him. You are taken aback at the sudden force of being pulled. You land on him, collide your bodies together, your limp bulge pressing on his hip bone and feel that DAMN FEELING in your chest and loins again. Fuck... you find yourself kissing him, he’s wrapping his arms around your neck, and before you know it, you’re sighing happily and kissing him intensely. He moans into your mouth and your cock twitches.

“Why does lockin lips with you feel so motherfuckin.... gooood...” he lazily says in between your lips, you can feel his breath in your lungs. You moan back. You had no idea. But you felt the same way. You make out with him for what feels like a few minutes, before you push yourself up and off of him. His hands still linger on your skin.

“Come on, fuckass, we need to go fucking wash this shit off.” You groan. He sighs and says, “fine, motherfucker,” covering his eyes with his arm for a second or two before taking a deep breath and then rising up. “Ah, shit, we really... uh... heheh.... made a motherfuckin mess up in here...” he smirks sheepishly, how’s that even possible. He grabs your hand as you bend down to grab your shirt and your underwear and your pants that he threw in various directions. You look up at him. He leans in, bends down a little tiny bit, and he kisses you again. Gently but lustful, full of emotion. Fuck. You wrap one of your legs around him and stand on your tippy toes, gripping onto his shoulders. You want to fuck him again. Right here. Right on this floor. You kiss his ear.  
“Ah.... mm... come on, best friend... Let’s clean up, huh?” He says, biting his bottom lip with one fang, indenting the area temporarily. You watch him grab fresh clothes as you walk out the door towards his shower. You enter the bathroom and turn the faucet on. You set your clothes on the counter, and feel the temperature. Warm. You step in. You hear Gamzee getting closer to the door. You get your hair wet, and feel the water drain down your body, washing away the dried fluids.

That’s really nice.

Gamzee draws the curtain enough to get in with you. You shudder as he towers over you in the smaller space. He grins and says, “hey, bro. Mind if I.... join ya?” But he just laughs and you laugh, too, because the idiot’s already in here with you. You’re about to reach for the shampoo bottle when he grabs your wrist and his teeth find their way to your neck. Oh, fuck. You shudder at his touch, and whine instantly. Your nerves were so sensitive when it was him who was touching you. You lean in to his teeth even more, hoping he’ll keep doing it. He moves to different areas, and you can’t help but moan and grab onto him. Goddamn it, again? Your nook is getting wet. Why are you so turned on? He squeezes one of your ass cheeks with one hand and you kind of, just... wrap your leg around his torso and grind up against his growing bulge. He moans and you moan with him.

“You’re such a dirty little fucker, Karbro.” He licks up your neck to your ear and whispers, “wanna feel me inside you again?” And you shudder. He grinds up against you, threatening to penetrate you. But you’re already wet. It wouldn’t hurt too bad if he just shoved it in you and rammed you in this stupid ass shower. Which is exactly what he does when you say “yes...” in a seductive way. He twists you around, lifts one of your legs up, buries his face in your neck, and slides his cock in between your wet nook lips, as a tease. “Yeah? You s-sure...?” He whispers in your ear. You whine. He nips your ear and slides inside of you. Again. You gasp and push down deeper. It stretches you out a little bit, but you can take it.

“Oh, god, Gamzee, fuck me, please fuck me. Fuck me again. I need it.” You didn’t even feel like yourself with all this lust clouding your head. But damn, it sure made him happy. He sinks his teeth into your neck as he thrusts up inside you again, still sore from last night, feeling full and amazing and insatiable and.... fuck. He squeezes your thigh in just the right way as his cock fucks into you like his life depends on it. Your body is moving up and down and you’re fucking gone again. Why did this feel so fucking good.... it was definitely going to happen again. What if it becomes a routine? Ugh..... actually, you hope it does. Is this what moirails do? Doesn’t even matter. Not when he’s inside of you. Makes you feel like all your worries are just minuscule little things inside a giant ball that is filled with so much more than just worries.

His other hand slides it’s way up your waist and grips just below your ribcage. It doesn’t hurt, he’s just gripping you tight enough so you don’t slip or lose balance and make the sensation go away. He likes to hold you firmly. And you are okay with it. You find yourself gripping onto a ledge in the shower, knocking a bottle on the floor as the hot water sprays both of you. Your moans echo throughout the hive. He moans into your neck as all you hear is the shower water, your beautiful sounds, and the hard wet slapping sound of penetration. You feel so full, so good, so very good.... and you squirt genetic fluid all over his shower as he thrusts into you a few more times. Fuck. You both didn’t last as long this time, but that’s okay. Fuck. You gasp for breath. He fucks into you one last time as he cums, for good measure, moaning into your ear, before he pulls out, spewing purple onto the shower floor and walls. You let go of the ledge and pant, looking at him. That was hot. You were both still sleepy, but that was still really good.

“Is this gonna become a routine thing with you, won’t be able to keep your hands off me whenever I’m near, now?” You laugh. He grins and kisses you again. “Yeah.” But then he breaks away. “Unless you don’t want it, bro...” and you laugh.

“I just practically begged for you to fuck me, in a fucking SHOWER, before I even washed my hair. I think I’m okay with doing this again.”

He grins again as you grab the shampoo bottle and squirt some in your hair. He does the same. And once you rinse it out and reach for the body wash, he grips your shoulders and presses a wet kiss to your temple. “Let me.” He says, and washes your body. How romantic. Jesus. He places small kisses all over your body until you rinse off. He washes his own body. Then, he grabs the face wash, and you watch very closely as his fucking makeup washes away. You grab his wrist and say “why don’t I do it?” And he lets you. You finish cleaning his face off, staring at his beauty underneath. Sure, he had a few blemishes, whatever. But as he rinsed everything off and opened his eyes, and looked at you, completely naked, you felt something. His lips were curled into a smile. A real smile, not a painted on smile. It was.... really cute. You realize how vulnerable he’s being with you. He rarely ever lets anyone see him truely. You reach out to cusp his cheek in your palm.

“You look really hot, shitstain.” You see him blush, and you melt a little. This idiot.

“Nah, bro.... nah... you just all up and flattering a motherfucker because this dick is motherfuckin bomb.” He emphasizes the word “bomb”. He fuckin has the nerve to say that, and THEN chuckle afterwards. Little shit. You hit him gently in the shoulder.

“Asswipe.” You blush, realizing the “dick being bomb” part is really fucking true. You probably look like a tomato right now. But you didn’t say it just because he is really good at.... that stuff. You growl. “Dude! No. I mean... yeah... but not like that! I wouldn’t compliment your stupid ass face just because you have a way with your body. Idiot...” you blush even redder. God, you’re flushed for this idiot. Great. He laughs again before reaching over you to turn off the water. He steps out and hands you a towel before you can step out yourself. He grins sheepishly. You think he ate some sopor. You blush red as fuck. “Thanks.”

“No problemo, my bro... heheh.” He towels himself off and you do the same, trying to ignore how hot he looks, avoiding his gaze every time he catches you staring. He just smiles every time. He pulls on a fucking ICP t-shirt and some baggy purple pants. Fucking dork, seriously. You just put your old clothes back on, since you didn’t intend to stay over previously. Otherwise you would’ve been wearing some sweatpants or something. He notices you seem uncomfortable so he just mellowly asks, “you wanna borrow some motherfuckin sweats or somethin, man?” And you blush AGAIN. FUCK.

“Y-yeah... yes. Fuck yeah. I want to wear some of your fucking sweatpants.” He chuckles and disappears into his room. You exhale. Damn. You’re really fucked right now. You look in the mirror and wonder what he sees in you. He returns, his horns peaking through the doorway before his awkward lanky body shows. He hand them to you and watches you strip your pants off. Pervert. Just stands in the doorframe.

“You motherfucker, stop staring at me!” You huff and puff a little. He just laughs again and comes closer to you, his hands in his pockets, his chest inches from yours. He looks down at you in a stoned daze and bites his lip.

“What’s wrong, Karbro? You all shy and shit around me now?” He looks smug. Fucker.

“NO, I AM NOT.” 

“Then prove it.”

You reach up and grab him by his shirt and pull him down and fucking kiss him. He smiles into the kiss and gently puts his hands on your lower back.

“Heh... that’s more like it.” He pulls you out of the bathroom, still kissing you. God, he’s so tall... mmmmmmf.  
Your heart skips a beat as he pulls away, grinning like a psycho.  
“You’re so fucking weird, idiot. What are we gonna do now?”  
He just walks over to the fridge and grabs a Faygo and licks a bit of sopor slime off one of his digits, his messy hair falling in his face and sticking up in all directions. He hands you a grape Faygo. You wanna complain about how shitty it is but the truth is that it wasn’t that bad. It tasted kind of good, actually. He takes a redpop and then he grabs some jerky and fucking wolfs it down. Tells you to help yourself to what ever the fuck you want. You just stand in the kitchen, watching him eat. How he devours it yet somehow savors it. He cracks open an eye as he sees you staring. You really were acting shy, huh?  
“Hey, uh... Gamzee?” You say.  
“Hm?”  
“I’ve never really... done this with anyone before. It’s all so new and it feels kind of... strange. I mean, I don’t regret it, at all, so don’t get the wrong idea... but, uh...” he stops you, by putting his finger over your mouth. You look up at him. He sensed how nervous you were, but you guess it was blatantly obvious.  
“Hey, it’s okay, Karbro. I’m still the same ole me, and you’s still the same ole you. Only difference is that now,” he leans in for a kiss. “Now we... fuckin.” He does the wiggly brows thing at you and you shove him playfully, laughing.  
“Fuckin dork. You’re so stupid.”  
He laughs back. “Hey, come on, now... you motherfuckin love it.” He kisses you again. Damn, he really fucking likes you. “No, but seriously... it’s okay, Karbro. This shit is all natural and there ain’t nothin wrong with all up and bein a lil shy afterwards. It just means our relationship is stronger now and shit, ya know? And fuck, bro, if you have a problem, tell me. I’ll do whatever a motherfucker can to ensure you’s feelin alright.” You pull away and grin at him. His voice, his tone, his stupid fucking stoney eyes, his reassuring grin. He’s so warm. And comforting. You rest your head in his shoulder. “You dumb fucking clown.”


	3. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emotional shit.

You wake up to an empty bed. Karkat isn’t here this time. He went back to his hive. You guys sat on the couch and watched some TV, got high, and then he said he had to go. Kinda fuckin lame, gonna be honest... you of course let him leave, but you still felt a pang of sadness as he walked out the door. He turned around and gave you this sweet look, but he looked kinda anxious, too. You facepalm. Of course, bro. He is always weird, but now your relationship has changed. Motherfuckin wicked shit, but you still get a little worried about him. What if he doesn’t really like you the way you like him? You have really intense red feelings for this fucker. Him being with you made your thinkpan think, “he’s totally into it, and into you.” But what if he wasn’t? I mean.... he was. He really was. You could feel it emanating off of him. Maybe the lil motherfucker just didn’t know how to express red feelings yet. He did say you were his first, technically. Wow. That’s motherfuckin... beautiful.  
You decide to get out of bed. It wasn’t as warm when he wasn’t there. Chill out, bro. You can’t get too attached to having someone sleep next to you. Then you won’t ever appreciate sleepin by yourself. You walk out to the kitchen and get some fuckin pie and then you go into the bathroom and look in the mirror. Your awkward body almost makes it so that your head isn’t completely in the frame, so you bend down a bit, only an inch or two, to apply some facepaint. You felt so much better when you put that shit on.

You don’t know why it was great. I mean, you didn’t just do it because of your religion. It was an art. It was self expression. It was taking something natural, something given to you, something you’re forced to deal with, and altering it the way you like. It was taking a blank canvas, and painting it the way you feel it should be painted. Making your own face. Others judged you more this way, and sometimes you wish they didn’t, but FUCK EM. You gonna do you, man. No matter what. Motherfuckers probably wouldn’t like you anyway, even if you did look more typical. If some shit’s a part of you, you gotta express it. And the motherfuckers who did matter didn’t really give too many shits, anyhow. Karkat was the first troll you’ve encountered that wasn’t intimidated by your odd appearance.

You think that’s partly why you love him. 

Heh. Fuck. Good thing he wasn’t around to hear that. You were too high to know if you said that out loud or not.

Your face covered with white, you smear the black around your piercing light purple eyes, grinning as you did so. You trace the curve of your lips, before filling it in all the way. Then you take the tip and slash across, where your lips end, drawing it out into a semi-smile, like usual. You just liked this look better than the others you’ve tried. Sometimes the edges were sharp, sometimes they were more soft. But you always looked fuckin awesome. This time, you did it perfectly. It felt so relieving to paint your canvas. You fill the lips in completely and then you take a final look at it. You make the finger guns at yourself to be a dork, even though no one was watching. They didn’t have to. Your personality didn’t depend on other’s approval. Fuck them. You opened your husktop and sent Karkat a message.

TC: hEy mOtHeRfUcKeR  
TC: HoNk hOnK :o)  
TC: I tHiNk I mIgHt DrOp bY, iF tHaT’s cOoL wItH yOu. :o)  
TC: I aCtUaLlY dOn’T gIvE a ShIt iF yOu WaNt mE oVeR oR Not, I’mA sTiLl bE cOmIn  
TC: sEe Ya SoOn, bRo >:o)

You close your husktop and don’t worry if he’ll get agitated with you. You know he’s chill even though he’s grumpy.

You get the fuck out your door and don’t really worry too much about anything attacking your ass. Most fuckers don’t fuck with a highblood. Heh. You had such a nice blood color. Looked so pretty on the walls. You feel the breeze sting your cuts. Oh, shit. You better cover those fuckers up. You run back inside your hive and grab a hoodie. Karkat would get really upset if he remembered you did that. You kind of feel really bad about it. You wish you didn’t do that. It was pretty self destructive, even though you already were. You didn’t wanna get triggered again, or trigger him. So you make sure to cover your arms with your black hoodie. Purple polka dots all over it. Your fuckin style. You try to get your mind off the self inflicted harm and you rush out the door again. Picking up your speed, because you wanna fuckin see your best bro. He made everything brighter. 

You arrive at Karkat’s hive. You walk up to his door and are about to barge in when he calls your name from behind you. “Hey, fuckass.” He says, crossing his arm. You turn around and give him a dopey grin.

“Heeey, best friend.” You reach in for a hug. He obliges but he huffs. He aggressively cares about people. It’s so motherfuckin cute. Sweet little Cancer. You run your fingers through his hair and sniff him without shame. He huffs again. “What the hell are you doing here, fuckass?”

“Just wanted to see my best bro again. It’s been a few days.”

“We’ve gone weeks without hanging out before.”

“Ye, I know, bro. But uh, I kinda really... fuckin... like yo company, ya feel me?” 

Karkat smiles. He was trying to be grumpy at you but it just wasn’t working out. “Goddamn it, why can’t I just be mad at you for five minutes? Fuck.”  
You laugh. “Why do y’all need to be mad at me?”  
“Because you’re an idiot. And you showed up without my permission like an idiot.” He crosses his arms.  
You pinch his cheek. “You showed up unannounced at my motherfuckin place just the other day. Don’t be hypocritical, Karbro.” You grin as his face turns red and he growls, slapping your hand away.  
“Whatever. You’re just clingy. Bulgelicker.”  
You grin even bigger. You inch closer to him, and wrap your arms around his waist. He blushes the prettiest shade of red. “Yeah, I may be a lil... heh. And I will... if you want me to.” You chuckle, it takes him a moment to catch on to what you meant. His face looks fake-horrified, like he’s making a big deal of it on purpose for dramatic effect, even though you know he really fucking digs it.  
He throws his hands up in the air, “ugh! You sick pervert, seriously! Do you have to twist everything I say? You’re so immature sometimes.” He pretends to be all mad about it. You lean in to kiss him. He melts into you. And you can tell he REALLY ISN’T mad at all, because he wouldn’t want you so badly if that were the fuckin case. Your hair blows in the wind as you hold his face firmly, while you kiss him gently. You open your eyes in a daze as your lips part and you grin. He groans. “Fuck you, seriously.”

You lick your lips. “Oh, please do, Karkat.”

He fucking facepalms and giggles. Your flirting was making him so embarrassed. You notice how he inches closer to you though, and you feel his body heat radiating off of him and into your skin. You like it. You’re always so cold. Kind of a pain in the ass, gonna be for real. He fuckin warms you in so many ways. Never thought you’d be so sappy for this little fucker but here you are, craving his presence. Feelin all lonely and shit at your hive, without him. He leans into your shoulder and hugs you. He sighs and then looks up at you and kisses you again. Then he wraps his arm around yours, so you’re kind of interlocked. He puts his hands in his jacket pockets and you do the same, your arms still interlinked together. Felt nice.

“Let’s go somewhere. I’m fucking bored of just standing here with your stupid ass.” Karkat mutters. And then he starts to walk. You walk alongside him.

“Awww, how romaaantic, bro. You can’t keep your hands off of me. And awww, you wanna go somewhere.... dare I say, where we can smooch in private? Oh, this is the teenage dream. Let’s carve each other’s initials in some trees.” You tease him and he fucking punches you softly in the arm that was interlocked with his other arm.

“Shut up, you asshole. You’re so fucking stupid. Stop being so dumb.” Then he giggles. “I love your quirks. You’re so fucking cute. You’re still annoying as hell though. Dumbass juggalo shit.” Aw. So affectionate. He can’t stop blushing. He’s so awkward with these cute ass feelings he has for you. “I want to just... go somewhere and be outside for a bit. Not like... I want you along, or anything. No way. You totally suck. I wish I was going ALONE.” He tightens his arm around yours. You look down at him, how he huffs and puffs and acts so bitchy and tries to be all menacing and shit, but it’s just too cute and you can’t help but fuckin laugh your ass off. You squeeze his arm back a couple times in a row and lean down closer to his ear and whisper, “mm, yeah. Sure, Karbro. I totally believe ya.” His little horns are so cute. Fuck. You dare to lick one of them. He squeaks in surprise and looks up at you, his face red. Reddest, prettiest shade of brothers.

“What the fuck, Gamzee!” You snicker. Give his head a little nuzzle. You look up and pass some trees, and wonder where the little dude is leading you. 

“Where are y’all takin my ass?” You ask casually.

“It’s a surprise. Not very far. It’s kind of... a nice place to go. You’ll fucking see, bulgelicker.” His steps increase slightly. His footing is so cute, how he kind of wobbles occasionally, leaning into you and brushing against your shoulder often. You wonder if he does it on purpose. You turn a left corner and pass an abandoned hive. Seems like there was a lot of abandoned hives out here. You never really did come out here. It was kind of creepy, in a comforting way. Like there’s nothin to really be on guard about out here. You come to a little place secluded between some trees, but it looks like a little entrance to somewhere. Sure as shit is. Karkat leads you in there, pulling on your arm with his arm as you take in the scenery. It was beautifully hypnotic. The tree branches were all wistful, even though they were all bare and dead-lookin. You head deeper into the woods, and suddenly you see a little spot with what appears to be almost like... a playground or something? Yeah. That’s what it looked like. It was. You look at him as he pulls his arm away from yours. He goes up to a little bench and he sits on top of it. He gestures for you to come sit by him. You obey him and plop down next to him.

“What the fuck’s this place, my best brother?”

His ears flatten a little. Gentle. “It’s... kind of special to me. Crabdad used to bring me here, so I could have fun like a little wiggler should. He’d sit here and watch me sometimes. Sometimes he would push me on those things.” He points to some swings. Your heart hurts a little at the mention of his lusus. You remember how neglected you were by your own. Only a twinge of jealousy do you feel when you see that Karkat had some bonding time with his lusus. Much more healthy, you presume. But you’re so glad that Karkat had good times as a wiggler. Even if it was better than your wigglerhood. A red little tear streams down his face and you tilt his chin up to look at you.  
“Hey, now, motherfucker... don’t cry. It’s okay. I mean, it’s okay to cry, too. But it’s okay, you had a pretty good wigglerhood. That’s somethin miraculous.” You wipe his tears away with your thumb. Karkat lost Crabdad not too long ago. It was tragic, how it happened. He still doesn’t want to talk about it. So you don’t push him. You kiss him on the cheek and rub his back and he falls into you and starts sobbing. You shoosh him, and pap his head.

“Hey, hey, shooooosh.... shooooosh...” you rub little soft circles in his shoulders and kiss his head. He clings to you a while longer before he pulls away and wipes his face from his fluids he leaked from crying.

“It’s been so fucking hard, Gamzee... it hurts so fucking bad.” He looks down, you pull him into your side and hold him.

“I know, lil bro. I know. Just try to remember the good times you had with him.” He started crying again. 

“I know, I am. And I’m so sorry that your fucking SHITTY ASS LUSUS WAS NEVER THERE FOR YOU. HE’S SUCH A PIECE OF SHIT.” 

You look down. “Yeah, yeah... he is a piece of shit. He fucked me up.” You just hold him while you let a tear fall. He grabs your neck and kisses you on the lips, his tears streaming into your mouth, salty sweet. Your heart wrenches for him, and yourself. At least his lusus loved him. You pull him into your cross-legged lap, his legs wrapping around your torso. He cries into your shoulder again, and you keep rubbing his shoulders and nuzzling into his neck. You wish you could take his motherfucking pain away.  
You remember getting a call from him late at night, his voice erratic and you could barely make out what he was saying. You could hear so much distress, discomfort, rapid breaths from hysteric crying, he was freaking out. And your stoned thinkpan automatically sobered up. You fucking ran to his hive without giving a fuck about anything else. Just him. Just Karkat. Your best bro. Your palemate. The one you would do fucking ANYTHING for. As you approached the door, you could see it was already wrenched open, you heard sobs from inside. You were so fucking scared. Your fucking body was so tense, rage was boiling inside of you. WHO THE FUCK HURT YOUR PRECIOUS KARKAT? NO ONE EVER LAYS A MOTHERFUCKING CLAW ON HIM. YOU WOULD RIP THEM TO SHREDS, BASH IN THEIR MOTHERFUCKING SKULL, DISSECT THEM AND STRING THEIR INTERNAL ORGANS ALL OVER THE STREET AS AN EXAMPLE OF HOW WORTHLESS THEY ARE. MOTHERFUCKIN SLAUGHTER THE ONE THEY LOVED MOST AFTERWARDS. YOU WOULD PAINT THE STREETS WITH THEIR FUCKING BLOOD. PAINT THE WALLS WITH THEIR BLOOD. FUCKING LAUGH IN THEIR DEAD FACES.  
But as you stepped inside you saw him just laying there, inches apart from his lusus, blood trailing all the way from the door to where Crabdad’s body lay, who was shredded from his torso up to his neck, gashes all over his body, so deep they penetrated through his shell and got down deep inside of him. You saw Karkat sobbing over him, and you immediately rush to his side, as he grabs your shirt and fucking buries his face in your neck, getting your shirt so fucking soaked, and you didn’t even care.  
“What. The... MOTHERFUCK.... happened...” you said. He just kept sobbing.  
You grabbed him by the shoulders, worry and rage boiling inside of your very soul. He looked so hopeless.  
Between erratic gasps for air, he stammered out, “he....he’s... he’s hurt bad, G-Gamzee.... he’s hurt bad... I can’t help him... he’s hurt bad...” and your heart breaks. Shattered into a million fucking pieces, and then stepped on with heavy, dirty boots. He’s more than just badly hurt. He’s dead. Tears rush to your eyes as you stare at him, he looks so broken.

“I.... I dragged him in here...” he sobs. “Tried to get the kit... they were too deep. They were too deep.” Then suddenly he lets out a scream. A scream of sorrow. A scream of anger. Pain. Hatred. Confusion. “THAT FUCKER OUTSIDE DID THIS! I left him out there. It’s FUCKING DEAD NOW.” He falls onto Crabdad, his tears intermingling with the cuts. You grab Karkat gently and look him in the eye. Between a mess of snivels and sobs, he looks at you. “Where is it?” You ask, your tone dark, your eyes filled with anger. He points out back, then climbs onto Crabdad’s corpse again. Holding him as if it’ll resuscitate him back to life. You motherfucking GO OUT WHERE HE SAID, and see a fucking dead lusus, with sharp teeth, claws... it’s color was stained with its filthy blood color. A motherfucking DISGRACE. You go up to its corpse, and fucking tear into it further, slicing it open with your claws, ripping out its fucking heart and you STOMP IT INTO TINY, FLESHY BITS. IT WASN’T EVEN MOTHERFUCKIN BEAUTIFUL. YOU DIDN’T EVEN FIND IT WORTHY OF PAINT. You SMASH its skull until it’s brain matter is scattered all over the yard and his bone fragments are ground to dust. You grab it’s body with all the force you can manage and fucking BREAK ITS SPINE over your knee. You let out an angered snarl. You start slashing at its body again, it’s spinal fluid leaking out of it’s broken spine. You fucking laugh at how UTTERLY PATHETIC IT LOOKS NOW. 

“LOOK AT YOU NOW, MOTHERFUCKER! LOOK AT YOU NOW!” You take out your clubs and fucking BASH IT, YOU BEAT IT INTO A FUCKIN MESS OF PULP. It’s disgusting, disgraceful bits and pieces get all over your clothes. All over your face. Your eyes glow red. You snarl as you feel a hand on your shoulder. You look down, ready to DESTROY WHATEVER TOUCHED YOU. PREPARED TO RIP THEM APART LIKE THIS USELESS FUCKER ON THE GROUND. But your heart clenches in on itself and you control your urge to lash out. Because it was Karkat. Red tears streaming down his face. You growl and grab him by his shoulders. He looks so frightened and sad. He’s still crying. And your rage leaves your eyes.

“Come on, Gamzee.... that’s enough.” He kicks the pulp of the once-was-a-creature, and screams how much he FUCKING HATES IT. You just look at him, and feel your stomach get butterflies. You wanted to grab him and fucking kiss him. But you didn’t. His lusus just motherfucking died. He kicks dirt and all types of shit into the smooshed organs. He stomps it all over his shoes. It stains him. You stare intently at him. He looks so beautiful when he’s angry. His pain is so expressive. You REALLY want to kiss him better. But you still don’t. He turns around and looks at you, tears and snot covering his face. You drop your weapons limply as he hugs you and breathes in your scent. You feel a twinge inside again. You slowly reach your hand up his back and hold him close, attempting to comfort your moirail. You didn’t bother shooshin him, though. You can’t just calm down from an event like this. You stroke his hair as he cries into your shirt again, and you look down at the dead fucker on the ground. You stare at it, with boiling rage. Emotionless except for the rage. The hate. The disgust. You wish you would’ve caught this motherfucker when it was alive. You would’ve made it SUFFER. You wrap your arm around Karkat, sheltering him in your embrace, as if it would protect him from all the evil out there. You knew it wouldn’t. You went back inside, and helped him drag Crabdad’s body out.

A few hours pass. Karkat is wrapped up in a blanket, traumatized. You’re smoking a cigarette, looking out at the sky. Letting the smoke slowly roll out, inhaling deeply. Sitting beside your moirail. His small body pressed against yours, shaking.

“I want to let him go out at sea. I want his body to rest out there.” He said, crying. You pulled his body up on a gourney-like thing, big enough to hold him. You look at Karkat. You wrap your arms around him. “I can help a brother out in that department...” and for the rest of the night, you and Karkat dragged Crabdad’s body out to the sea.

When you finally arrived, Karkat collapsed on the beach... his pants rolled up and his knees scraping into the sand. He looked out at the water, he listened to the sounds. The moon was full, reflecting off the shore. The small waves ever-constant. You press a hand on his shoulder. You sit down beside him. He entwines his hand in yours. You look down at his hand, how it fits perfectly in yours, smaller and soft... then you look back out at the sea. You look back at his lusus’ body.

“Are you ready, my pale bro?” You ask gently. Quietly.

Karkat looks at you. Pain in his eyes. So much pain in his eyes. “Y-yeah...”

He slowly rises up, you help him keep his balance, your hand still in his. You walk over to his lusus. Karkat grazes his hand over Crabdad’s face one last time, lets tears fall down his face, shamelessly, painfully. “I’m sorry, dad... I love you.” He says his goodbyes, while you walk over to a tree. Pick up a few flowers. Red. Just like Karkat. Just like the crab. You walk back over and place them around his body. He gives you a knowing look, and then you drag him out to the water, keeping him on the thing that held him in place, Karkat held on to your hand, gripping you tightly, as you pushed him out to sea in unison. You just stood there with him, both of you watching as he floated out to sea. Until you couldn’t see him anymore. And then you just stayed there even longer. Until the sun rise in the sky. Neither of you spoke a word. You just sat there together, looking out at the abyss of the world. 

The next morning, you realize, as you awoke, you had covered him in blankets. But he refused to go inside your hive. He refused to leave the beach. You stayed out there all night with him. He slept the entire day away, tossing and turning. He stayed there for two days. Barely speaking. Barely eating. You forced him to eat and drink, leaving him shortly to go inside before bringing him offerings. You held him without saying anything. Then he finally spoke. “Thank you, Gamzee... you’re the only one I can trust.” He started crying again. You papped him and held him as close as you could, you were afraid if you let him go, he’d float away, too.

Now, as you sit on this bench in this abandoned playground with your favorite troll in the universe, you hold him just as close as you did that day. He missed Crabdad so much. You felt it in his breath. His demeanor. He wasn’t as spunky as he used to be. He would recover, eventually. These things take time. You knew that. So you just hold him, relish in the way his legs are wrapped around your torso, the way his soft hair smells, engulfs your senses. You kiss him and hold him and rub him comfortingly. He was far too precious for his world. You would motherfucking do anything for him.


	4. Chapter 4

You hold him there until it gets dark. Just sitting in the playground, talking about things. You hold his little body close to you, as close as you can, almost as if you were trying to fuse him into you. He shivers from the cold, so you unzip your jacket and wrap him up in it, sitting him in your lap. You’re still wearing it. It’s pretty oversized. He seems all comforted by it n shit, so that’s a good motherfuckin thing. He tells you about the games he’d play here with Crabdad, and you listen intently because you fucking care about this little motherfucker so much it makes your bloodpusher hurt and ache and twist up, and your stomach gets all these butterflies n shit. Damn. He’s got you good. When he’s calmed down a bit, steadying his breathing against your chest, resting his head on your shoulder, you lean down, graze your nose against his cheek as he looks up at you, his eyes all dazed, glazed over with some type of emotion you couldn’t place. But it was a good one. A real good motherfuckin feeling. You gently press your lips to his.

You got all this motherfuckin passion and lust and red feelings for your little Karbro, it’s bitchtits. A beautiful miracle. The greatest miracle you ever done up and motherfuckin witnessed all up here in this motherfucker. His lips part gently into yours, submitting willingly to you, his arms tightening around your waist. The way his teeth graze your bottom lip... fuck. You let out a soft moan, because shit, bro. This little sweetheart really knows how to make out with a motherfucker. Between a tangle of lips, and an occasional slip of the tongue, Karkat breathes out, “I wanna pile you.”

You grin into his mouth, your teeth catching on his bottom lip gently. “Hell yeah, let’s motherfuckin dO iT, bro.” You kiss him again, hungrily but still gentle as fuck. You honestly just wanna bend him over, shove him down facefirst on this bench (gently of course) and lean over him, biting into his neck and holding his mouth with one hand while he moans for you, muffled. You resist the motherfuckin urge. “I’d really, really appreciate that.” Your voice is a little unsteady from lust. He smiles at you, giving you a kiss on your cheek. You practically melt.

“Well, let’s go, then.” Karkat whispers. He coaxes you to get up, so you do. You try your best to, uh, ya know, conceal your bulge that was kiiiinda protruding out a little bit. You shove your hands in your pockets and grip onto it through the inside, trying to make it seem like you totally weren’t motherfuckin hard for him when he barely did anything. Shiiiiit, man. He didn’t fuckin notice. Whew. It’s all cool. It’s all chill as fuck.

His hands are in his pockets and he’s walking alongside you, and looking up at you, noticing somethin off about your face. You were starin forward, with a motherfuckin weird ass facial expression. “Uh.... you good, Gam?” Then he looks down. Oh shiiiiiit. You look over at him and grin. “Yeah, motherfucker, everything’s chiiiiill.” You wink at him.  
He laughs and shoves your shoulder. “Mhmm.... sure, fuckass.” He blushes. Then suddenly he just fuckin pushes you up against a tree, your back thumping against the hard bark. Shit, that took you by surprise. He looks up at you with this devious little facial expression and then he reaches down and gropes you through your pants. You gasp. “Mhm. No problem at all.” He says, looking you in the eye. You throw your hands up dramatically and chuckle goofily, “aight, bro, ya caught me, uh oh! Hehehh. The jig is motherfuckin up.” He gets all up on his tippy toes pulls on your shirt and kisses you while stroking you through your pants. Holy shit. You grab onto his ass and grind up against his hand, kissing him ferociously. He moans and it sends a shiver throughout your fuckin whole body. You grip onto him and squeeze him tighter. He keels over a little bit, breaking the kiss, moaning into your shoulder and pressing up against you, panting.

“Goddamn, I want you.” 

When he says that, you bite his neck gently enough to not cause any blood to drip, but firm enough to leave a mark. You feel precum forming. Fuck. This little motherfucker was really good at this.

“Oh, yeah?” Your voice is shaking. Your facepaint is smeared on his lips when he looks back up at you. He looks so hot. You snake your tongue out at him and flick it on his chin. Your thinkpan is going into overdrive. FUCK HIM. FUCK THE MOTHERFUCKING SHIT OUT OF HIM. DESECRATE HIM. MAKE HIM SCREAM. FUCK HIM UNTIL HE BLEEDS. ...Fuck him gently. Kiss him until it doesn’t hurt anymore.

You don’t even bother looking around, to see if anyone was watching. You grab his zipper and pull it down. He helps you get them off, seemingly eager. You like the way he shoves you into the tree further, pushing harder, sucking on your neck. You practically rip your pants off. I mean, they don’t rip, but ya know. Heh. Your bulge presses against his, they wrap around each other and you hear him sigh happily. You reach down and tease his nook. Soaking wet. Wow. This horny little shit. You both want each other so bad, it makes your stomach flutter. You grip his ass and lift him up, his legs wrapping around you. You kiss him fiercely.

“G-Gamzee...fuck, you asshole.... nnnng, what are you.... doing to me...”

You lick up his neck and your bulge disconnects from his before you press it to his wet little nook, slowly entering him. Fuck. “You started it...” you whisper lustfully into his ear. Tight... the walls clench onto you like they need you. It’s intoxicating... so... addicting. It’s better than sopor. Fuck, it’s so much better than sopor. It screams your name with it’s wetness. It feels you out and makes every stroke, every thrust, every clench feel like you’re getting high for the first time, seeing magical shit that isn’t even there. 

“N-no.... you... you did.” 

He’s really tryin to argue with you right now. This little shit. He knows what he’s doin. You’ll get him to shut the fuck up. So, you start to move your hips, telling him to shut the fuck up with your cock. Finding a steady rhythm, penetrating as deep as you can...

He’s so loud. You don’t even know how he can be so turned on by you. Ain’t complainin none, though. You dig your nails into his flesh as you thrust up into him, and he moans hungrily every time you do. Fuck. He’s gripping onto your shirt with one hand, his other wrapping your neck to the other side and sinking his claws in. You hold him as tight as you can, fucking him like a little ragdoll against this motherfuckin tree, your back scratching up against it roughly. His head falls, his chin resting on your shoulder... didn’t stay very steady though, because he’s bouncing on your cock and fuck, it feels so good. His warm breath radiating heat... he sinks his teeth into your shoulder. His nook clenches around you tighter, demanding more. You gladly oblige. You slide down the tree, and position him on his side slightly while you pull his leg up onto your shoulder, your claws sinking into his hips. You grin down at him as he grasps at the grass as you pound into him, sticking your tongue out and winking at him as he looks up at you. It makes him go crazy.

“You f-fuckinnnggg... tease...” he moans out. He looks so good like this. Vulnerable, submissive, practically begging for more. You really dig this change of character in him. He looks so delicious on the ground, his claws digging up the ground, saliva drooling out, he closes his eyes and bites his lip for a moment before looking back up at you, his eyes glazed over with lust and... want. Carnal desires running through his veins. Motherfuckin precious. You could just eat him up. You lean down and choke him out while you continue thrusting, his legs shuddering in pleasure, your face inches from his, your teeth threatening to take a bite, your lips pressed so close, teasing, he tries to conceal his moans as your lips press to his, his arms wrapping around your neck, pulling you down into him. You make out with him, practically out of breath. His tongue hungrily intertwining with yours. He breathes out shallowly as your hand squeezes the sides of his neck. Your rip your hand away from his throat and leave claw marks down his back, all the way down to his ass and you grip it again, he gasps for more, he whines and moans and throws his head back, all while you’re kissing around his right nipple and leaving trails of kisses all the way to his left, snaking your tongue around it, giving it a little nibble, pulling on it with your teeth.

You like how he shivers, entangling his claws in your messy hair. You move up to his neck, and bite into him, pulling on his neck’s flesh with your teeth, before sucking it into your mouth. You stroke his bulge, and move up his jaw and to his lips again. You pull away and grip onto his hips, his leg still on your shoulder while you thrust into him as hard as you can, his body rocking up and down on the grass. Your bulge inside of him all the way down the hilt. Juices flowing and slapping. You feel his insides tighten around your member as it draws you in... you drop your head down to his, nip at his ear, and let out a wrecked sound, combining with his sounds, and you release inside of him. Warm, gooey... and oh, so welcoming. Your whole body shudders... He nips at your ear. Fuck. Then he screams out as his fluids spill out of his nook and bulge in unison, gripping onto you as tight as he can. Damn. You kiss his neck hungrily as he finishes, and his eyes are rolled back. What can ya say? He brings out some animalistic desire inside of you.

You make out with him between pants and gasps for breath and small lingering moans. He looks into your eyes. He gasps for breath and grins like a high goof.

“S-shit.... goddamn, you... you fucking shit...” he can’t even talk. You chuckle. You’re feelin that. Then you realize you got cum on his body. So you dirtily move down and lick it off. You hear him mutter something about you being sick. You chuckled. It tasted salty, but sweet, like candy... warm, the consistency was odd, but you really liked it. You lick it off his waist where he spilled, you lick it out of his dripping nook, tasting yourself. You didn’t mind. He shudders again as your tongue enters him, to lick the rest of it out. You suck it off his inner thighs. You don’t stop until it’s clean. You swallow. You nasty little fuck. You don’t give a shit.

He looks at your bulge, covered in purple fluid, dripping on your thighs. He bites his lip, and you can tell he’s kind of pondering about whether or not he should do that, too. But he can barely think, you can tell, and he lazily flips his face down on your cock, his lips trailing down your stomach first, licking the stains. You gulp, and you think he likes it, because he moves down and grasps your bulge and starts sucking the cum off of it. You moan again, biting your lip, lifting your leg up a bit. His tongue trails down and sucks on your thighs. He nips his teeth at them a lil. You gasp and rest your hand in his hair, gripping gently. It feels miraculous as fuck.

He moves his tongue back up your shaft and you can’t help but release a little more fluid into his mouth as he suck the tip just right... you tell him how good it feels and takes you in as far as he can without gagging, and swirls his tongue. Your grip in his hair tightens.

“Kar.... wh-whatcha.... doin...?” He continues suckling at your bulge. You let out a moan and wonder how you got so lucky.

He grips onto your waist as he sucks you off, making you cum again. It squirts in his mouth and it takes him by surprise, he lets go a little and the rest of it spills onto the grass. Some dribbles down his chin, but he swallows most of it.

You fall back into the grass. He climbs on top of you and grins.

“H-how was that.... fuckass?”

You grab him and pull him down onto you and kiss him hard, orgasmic release making you feel like you were floating around in space, his lips dancing around on yours. “Motherfuckin....maaagic.”

Y’all just lay there for about 20 minutes before you pull your clothes back on. You hold his hand the whole time you walk back to his hive. When he opens the door, he walks into his room and collapses on a horn pile you and him made for when you were over at his hive instead. He hated the little honks, but he did it for you. You plop down next to him. Honk.  
He makes a cute little frustrated sound and says “c-merreee...” and pulls you into him. You just lay there and nuzzle into him, your chin resting on his head, his face nuzzled into your neck. Felt motherfuckin fantastic. You hold him close, wrapping your legs around each other. He kisses your neck.

“Mmmm... hey, Gamzee?” He kisses your jawline.

“Yeah?”

He moves so he’s looking you in the eye. They’re so full of vulnerability. You practically swoon. His fiery little eyes. His cute ass nose. You can’t help but grin. He looks serious, though. Gentle, but serious. Vulnerable. That’s the good shit.

“Am I your first?” He blurts out, his gaze a mixture of uncertainty and certainty. His hands clinging to you, his eyes full of emotion. He’s so damn cute.

Your throat tightens. You can’t lie to him. You knew you were his first. You wished you could say the same, make him feel more special. Because fuck, he’s so motherfuckin special. He deserves to know he’s the most motherfuckin precious thing you ever did up and meet. He senses your tension and he looks down. He probably knows.

You look away, too. “Who was it?” He asks quietly.

“...Terezi.”

He looks at you again. “What, really? Her? Why?”

“It wasn’t healthy. We were shooting spades at each other. She just kind of, came on to me. It only happened once.”

Karkat looks slightly hurt. Aw. You brush his cheek with your thumb.

“But it didn’t feel that good. I promise you. We didn’t have any motherfuckin chemistry. I didn’t even finish.”

Karkat looks at you, and sees your shame. You avert your eyes. You wished you never did that. He sighs and lifts your head so you look at him again. He gives you a soft kiss on your lips.

“It’s okay, I guess... you fucking idiot. Why would you sleep with someone if you didn’t like them?”

“I don’t know. I was... curious, I guess... wanted to know how it felt.”

“Well... how did it feel?”

You cringe a little. “Like... motherfuckin... fuckin... a sock. Didn’t feel right, didn’t move right, kind of chafed my sensitive bits... ya know?”

He actually laughs. “Haha, shit. Wow. You’re seriously so retarded. I’d expect you to at least try with Tavros before Terezi. ...but, it didn’t feel good at all?”

“Not really. She didn’t feel right, my best bro. I stopped after a couple minutes. I, uh, told her I had to go. Sis was probably disappointed. ...And, uh, I wasn’t red for her. It was black, and it wasn’t black romance. Just... black.”

Karkat kisses you again. You kiss him back. “I’m sorry, bro...”

“It’s fine... you’re stupid for doing it, but I forgive you.”

“Does it.... make ya feel... less special?” You wince a bit. Your heart lurches in your chest. You wanted him to say no.

“Well, if you didn’t have any chemistry, and I compare that to what we have... I’d say... no... it doesn’t make me feel less special. I feel really fucking good with you. And I know you feel it too, nookstain. It’s electric... not to be cheesy or whatever. Fuck you. Asshole.” He crosses his arms, pouting.

You climb on top of him and kiss him, pulling him into you. He, of course, gives in.

“Heheh, honk.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More relaxed domestic shit. <3 they love each other

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shorter chapter :oP I think you need to cultivate slower chapters into a story, enjoy it though <3

You continue to hold Karkat in the pile. He dozed off, as did you. But now, you’re awake and sniffing his hair and pressin tiny kisses on his head, because he’s just so motherfuckin SOFT. You should probably get up and eat some sopor, but FUCK THAT, YOU’RE GONNA CUDDLE THIS MOTHERFUCKER. If anyone ever tried to hurt him, you would definitely cull them. Without hesitation. He makes little huff sounds in his sleep, and his leg twitches a few times. You shoosh softly. Poor sweetheart’s been having bad dreams since his lusus died, you bet.  
You curse yourself for feeling your cock twitch when he moans in his sleep. It just sounds suggestive as hell, bro. And you just fucked him about 5 hours ago.

You wonder if the feeling lingers with him. It lingers with you. It wraps its ghostly hands around you and strokes you. You try not to get hard, though. Don’t wanna disturb the little motherfucker. You slowly untangle yourself from him, and go into the bathroom piss. Then you decide you should jack off. So you do. When you emerge, he’s still sleepin. Aw. He’s so precious. You lick some sopor slime and walk back over the pile, careful to not honk any horns. He reaches out for you. “Mmm, Gamzee...” he’s still asleep, but he pulls you into him anyway. You try your best not to honk any horns. Really hard. They only let out small sounds, not barely enough to wake him. You sigh as you slowly relax and wrap your arms around him, pulling him into your chest. He slowly grips your shirt and... uh, is that motherfucker sniffing you? Yeah, he is. Is he still sleepin? You don’t move. You just lay there and watch him as he starts to make happy little noises and he snuggles up closer to you, grinding his bulge on your thigh. “Mmmm... Gamzee...” you start to blush and try to control yourself from crackin up. This little motherfucker is asleep, moaning your name, grindin on you. It’s motherfucking AdOrAbLe. He grips your shirt softly as he moves his body on you. His mouth opens and he licks your chest that was exposed from him tugging your shirt down. You try your best to not get aroused. Pretty difficult not to, though.  
Beautiful ass motherfucker. You gently grab his chin and pull his lips into yours. He kisses back, moaning still. So motherfucking precious. So motherfucking precious. Fuck. Shiiiit.

His little horns are so cute. You reach up and stroke one. He grips tighter and grinds harder. You chuckle quietly and start to suckle on the other one.

“Ahhhh...”

You flick your tongue. He opens his eyes, staring directly at you. He bites his lip. “Mm... what the fuck...”

He looks down at his bulge. “Oh, fuck, what did you do, you asswipe? Can’t I sleep without you molesting me?”

You fuckin crack up. “Bro... you came on to me, I was all gentlemanly and shit and diiiidn’t molest ya in your shuteye time.”

“Oh, yeah, right, suuure, Gamzee.” He averts his eyes. Bites his lip alls types of wicked cute. “But.... uh... it did feel kind of.... good.” Suddenly he grabs onto you, leans up, whispers in your ear, “c-can you maybe do it... again?”

“What... this?” You grasp at his bulge through his pjs, looking him in the eye, your eyes lustful. He grinds into your touch.

“Y-yeah... like that...”

“What if I did it a little more...?” You reach down inside his pants and touch his bare bulge, skin to skin contact felt so much better. He moans, “yeah, that works better... ugh... fuck you.” Your nose is in his neck, kissing the soft flesh passionately, nipping at the center occasionally. You’re breathing in his scent, and leaning up to let your breath roll out in his ear, before nipping his earlobe teasingly. He really likes that. You stroke him while you do this. He grasps onto your shirt and calls you a nookstain. You loved how he showed affection. And you saw through the name-calling, because you knew he didn’t mean it to be rude. Even if he was in a total rage, screaming at you, and meaning every name he called you, you’d still be into it.

You smile when he gets closer and wraps himself around you, daring to look into your eyes while you lick your lips and stroke him off. “Y-you bulgelicker... you make me feel so good. So fucking good... ahhh...” he buries his face in your collarbone, his arms wrapped around your neck, moaning softly. It’s really hot.

“Let it out, baby.... it’s okay. Mmm... you’re safe with me, you know that?”

He moans a little louder when you say that. He loves to feel safe. “Y-yeah, I-I know... I know.” You kiss the back of his neck, your hand that isn’t stroking him makes it’s way to his face, and you lean his head up, and kiss him lovingly. You know how to treat a motherfucker when you really diggin em. His breathing hitches, and he looks up into your eyes.

“S-say that... again.”

“You’re safe with me.”

He creams into your hand, his bulge twitching, letting out an aroused, pleasured sigh of contentment.

“Mmm... you’re safe with me, too...” he says into your neck, his voice slightly muffled. You lick some of the fluid off your fingers. He watches you. “You’re disgusting...”

You swallow with a loud gulp, for dramatic effect. You lean in to his ear. “Yeah, I may be, but you love it...” you pull him by his shirt and grind against his hip.

“Ahh.... s-shut u-up... and fuck me...”  
Whoa.

“I just made you cum.... perverted ass...” you tease.

He grabs your hand and shoves it down his pants, guiding your fingers to the opening of his nook. Dripping. Fuck. He looks you in the eyes, his face flushed, his own eyes lidded with desire. “I don’t give a flying shit. I want to feel you again. I-I like how you...” you penetrate him with two fingers before he can finish. He gasps, opening up for you. He feels your bulge through your pajamas. You groan delightedly, grinning toothily at him as he moves his leg up on your hip for better access. You flick your fingers upward inside of him. Somehow you just knew where to touch him, how to pleasure him. It was like an instinct. Maybe he’s just way too horny for your clown ass. Heh.  
He starts to grind down on your fingers, practically riding them. He pulls your bottoms down and unleashes your bulge, stroking it while you finger him. You kiss him passionately and he moans into your mouth.

“I want it... I want it, Gamzee. Just... please.” He was so adorably awkward, demanding. What a character. You kiss his cheek.

You lift his leg up over your hip, pulling him into you, pressing your bulge to his nook and slowly pressing in. You really can’t get enough of this shit. You wrap an arm around his neck and press his face into your shoulder while you start to fuck into him, gripping his leg with your other hand tightly. He kisses your neck. Karkat starts to ride you, while you thrust inside. A perfect rhythm. You’re stoned, but you can still do it a little roughly. You know he likes it rough as much as he does gentle. It’s quick, but it was still good. You thrust as hard as you can while you cum. It was lazier, sleepier, but it was better than no sex at all.

“Mmm...”  
He’s so perfect. You leave yourself inside of him.

“I’m red for you.” Karkat says. And oh, shit, you feel your bloodpusher skip a beat. Holy motherfuckin mirthful messiahs.

“Fuck, bro, I’m as red as your motherfucking blood color for you, even deeper...” you smirk at him. “Motherfuckin yeah, bro.” You chuckle into his skin, relief and all these good amazing ass feelings pouring through your soul, embracing you and feelin like nothing but miracles. “Guess that means you’re... down with the clown, motherfucker.”

He giggles. “God... why am I attracted to you? You’re the dumbest fuck I’ve ever come into contact with.” Yet, his eyes dilate when you touch him. Tells you all these things about how you’re all up and stupid and shit, but he likes to lean into your bod anyway, and kiss you when you’re thinkin on somethin too long. He claims you ain’t shit, and then makes you feel like the bees motherfuckin knees. 

Motherfucker tells you he doesn’t need you, and then he clings onto you immediately afterwards. Cute little things like that give your bloodpusher an oversized boner.

You pull out of him.

“Mmmm... I don’t wanna leave... not that this feels nice, or whatever...”

You giggle and kiss his head. “It feels miraculous, brother. I love being here with you. You make everything seem like it don’t much matter at motherfuckin all.”

You feel safe with him and he feels safe with you. You are so in love with Karkat Vantas. You want to hold him for an eternity. You wanna stay here forever. But you wonder about Goatdad. You really motherfuckin doubt it, but you have a feelin he might show up soon. He has to check in on you soon. It’s been months since you’ve seen him. And you miss him. And the beach. You remember letting Crabdad’s body go out to sea again. You look at Karkat in a slightly sullen way, you feel for him. Must be hard as motherfuckin hell losin a lusus. The creature what raised you. Not that your lusus did much raising... you give him a kiss.

“We should change our clothes, bro. Oh, shit. I didn’t bring any spares. Heh. Whoops. Guess I’ll have to do the walk of shame, cumstains on my shirt and shit.” You chuckle.

“You’re leaving right now?” Karkat groans.

“I mean, soon, bro. I have to go see my motherfuckin lusus.”

He yawns. “Yeah... mhm... good luck with that...”

You try not to get defensive.  
“Hey... not cool, bro. He has ta show up soon. Been a lil bit since I’ve seen him. What if he shows when I’m not all up and bein there, and he just assumes I’ve moved, or abandoned him?”

Karkat growls. “He’s literally abandoned you, asshole. He’s never fucking there. He really doesn’t even deserve you.”

You look down sadly, your horns nearly touching a honky horn. Heh. “Yeah, but... ya know... he’s my lusus. I have to love him.”

“No, no, you really fucking don’t, dipshit.”

“Well you wouldn’t get it. You’ve had love from your lusus your whole life. Support. He was there for you.”

“Yeah, that’s true, and also, that makes no fucking sense. Also, he’s fucking dead now.”

You look down again. It stings a little. You feel like shit over what happened to his lusus. You can see the hurt in his eyes. The wound probably won’t ever heal completely. He’ll just keep tearing at it and reopening it. But I guess that’s how thinkpans work. “...Well, maybe it don’t make much sense, but bro... I just... I need to see him. Be missin the old goat sometimes, ‘fore he all up and motherfuckin croaks on me, too. And you’re right, probably. I’m sorry, bro... I wish I could’ve done somethin sooner.”

Karkat just sighs, holding back tears. “Whatever, just... if anything goes wrong, call me, or, fuck, troll me, I don’t care. Just contact me if it doesn’t go well. I’m here for you.” You pap him, kissing his forehead.

“I will, bro. I will. I’ll come see you soon... but I need to go see him. He’s supposed to see me tonight. He promised. I just need to.” So you get up, putting your clothes on, Karkat watching you as he still lays on the horn pile. He sighs. You lean down before you walk out the door, to pull him into you. You kiss him bye for now, and he lingers, trying to make you stay. You moan into his mouth softly, tenderly, letting him know it feels good. You break the kiss, and proceed to walk back to your hive, looking back at him and grinning at him. You were excited to see Goatdad. You missed him so motherfuckin much.


	6. Mental Breakdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gamzee freaks out, it might be a little triggering, I don’t know. He really RANTS. It’s INTENSE, bro. It’s sad, if you’re a Gam kinnie like me. For real though, TW!! It honestly depressed me as I wrote it. Lots of ups and downs in this story

.

You haven’t seen Gamzee in a few days. You knew he was probably sulking or something. You fucking hated his lusus. I mean, seriously! What a neglectful piece of shit. Still, you wanted to believe he came to visit Gam. You suddenly get a sinking feeling. Gamzee doesn’t normally ignore you. Well, he at least sends a message at least every day now. Two days. You try to contact him. You open your husktop.

CG: HEY FUCKASS, I’M COMING OVER.

You closed it. You just knew that the dumbass is probably in a pit of self loathing or some shit. You grab your jacket and head out the door. As you walk down the road, you picture Gamzee and Goatdad in tophats, sitting at a table, holding teacups with their pinky distended. You chuckle to yourself at that. Man, if only. You knew there would be no teacups, though. You didn’t even know why you had that stupid thought. This clown’s getting to you. You pick up your pace, your footing increasing. You see leaves falling all over the ground, and you admire how pretty it looks. The air is a little chilly, but it’s okay. All these leaves and trees going bare is making you feel really good inside. You’re sure Gamzee’s fine. You bend down and pick up a leaf, that looked like it had devil horns, and you think you should bring it to Gamzee as a gift. He likes nature shit. You hold onto it for the rest of the way. Even if he was sad, you could cheer him up with your cheesy ass. Takes you about ten minutes to get there. You approach his hive, looking out at the sea. Where you let your lusus go. You stare out at the water for a moment. You don’t see Gamzee on the beach, so you assume he’s inside. You take a deep breath, the leaf in your left hand while you open the door with your right.

Your gut wrenches. Of course. His shit is all destroyed, his paintings are shredded and fallen to the floor, you fucking gulp and take a deep breath. Goddamn it. Of fucking course. FUCK HIS LUSUS. You were so pissed off right now. Shit. He’s probably sober.... again. You cry out his name.

“Hey, Gamzee! What the fuck!”

You trip over a pie tin and huff. You see him in the corner of his room. He looks fucked up. He’s mumbling to himself. He notices you, and continues talking. You see so much insanity in his eyes.

“You’re placed in this world, inside this little space, right? And you try to motherfucking reach your hand out, to feel the fresh air, but it pricks at you like PINS AND NEEDLES. You feel calm for a moment, and then it SCREAMS AT YOU THE SECOND YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES TO SLEEP. Do you know what I’m motherfucking sayin, Karkat? YOU FEEL ME? HOW IT SOUNDS LIKE CONSTANT YELLING OR ANGER EVERY TIME YOU THINK YOU’RE MOTHERFUCKIN FINE? I SEE IT, BRO. I SEE IT ALL TOO CLEARLY. IT’S IN THE WALLS. IT’S IN THE FLOORBOARDS. IT’S CREAKING UP ON YOU EVERY CHANCE IT GETS, WATCHING YOU FROM THE DARKEST CORNERS OF THE ROOM, DARING.... JUST MOTHERFUCKING DARING TO STRIKE. BUT IT KEEPS YOU IN A STATE OF FEAR, BECAUSE IT’S A WHORE THAT LIKES TO TEASE YOU. IT LIKES TO LET YOU KNOW IT’S ALWAYS GONNA BE THERE AND IT ONLY COMES OUT WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE IT’S GONE. IT’S NEVER MOTHERFUCKING GONE, BROTHER. IT’S NEVER MOTHERFUCKING GONE! IT’S GONNA HOLD YOU WHEN YOU’VE GOT NO ONE ELSE TO HOLD YOU. EVERY TIME YOU FEEL CALM YOU’LL HEAR HIS VOICE. ANGRY AND ALWAYS DISAPPOINTED. RINGING IN YOUR EARS LONG AFTER YOU’RE THROUGH TALKIN.”

Your anxiety is really acting up right now. He’s acting so fucking unstable. You’re honestly fucking terrified right now. “Gamzee...”

“NO.... No, NO, no, No, nO...... shut up.” He growls. “HE LIKES THAT HE’S NEGLECTED ME AND FUCKED ME UP. HE LIKES THAT HE’S ALWAYS USED A DISTRACTION TO RAISE ME, LIKE A FUCKING TV OR LITTLE GAMES WIGGLERS PLAY. AND THEN HE HAS THE AUDACITY TO TALK TO YOU LIKE YOU’RE STILL A WIGGLER, TELLIN YOU THAT YOU USED TO LOVE THOSE LITTLE GAMES WE PLAYED. WHEN DID “WE” EVER FUCKIN DO ANYTHING? MAYBE ONCE OR TWICE? This is just....... makin me feel.... SO... FUCKIN.... WRONG INSIDE. I CAN’T SLEEP, KARBRO. I CLOSE MY EYES AND DRIFT AWAY AND THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN MY RAFT IS CAUGHT IN SOME BARBED WIRE, RIPPING IT OPEN AND CAUSING IT TO MOTHERFUCKING SINK. RIGHT INTO THE DEPTHS OF THE MOTHERFUCKIN ABYSS. IT’S TRUE THAT IT STARES BACK AT YOU, MAN.” He falls to the ground, crying, laughing hysterically, screaming, tugging at his hair. His arms are cut, it looks like he reopened the cuts. You just about throw up.

“Karbro..... I really need you right now.... if I don’t have you, I’ll slip away for good.” He sniffles. He’s visibly shaking. His eyes are wide. Trauma. You reach over to pap him, but he pushes your hand away and snarls. “I HAVEN’T GOTTEN ALL MY FUCKIN ANGER OUT YET, BRO. THERE’S STILL A LOT IN THERE. MY THINKPAN IS EATING ITSELF AND PUKING IT BACK UP ONLY TO SWALLOW IT ALL MOTHERFUCKIN OVER AGAIN. I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO, I FEEL LIKE I’M GONNA LOSE MY GRIP ON REALITY AGAIN. I CAN’T MOTHERFUCKIN SLEEP.” You just stand there, your stomach keeling over inside of itself. You don’t know the last time he’s eaten, he looked like shit. Beautiful, of course, but horrible. You feel your stomach churn and your breath hitch.

“KaRBro...... KaRBro.... KARBRO..... Karbro... I FUCKIN HATE HIM. I MOTHERFUCKIN HATE HIM. NEGLECTFUL STUPID PIECE OF WORTHLESS SHIT! HE CAN’T JUST THROW ME AWAY, GIVE ME NO STRUCTURE, AND THEN COME BACK AROUND WHEN HE FEELS LIKE IT AND THEN JUST ONLY KNOW HOW TO MAKE SMALL TALK AND THEN GET FUCKING PISSED WHEN I TRY TO TELL HIM ANYTHING REAL. HE MOTHERFUCKIN REFUSES TO ADMIT HE FUCKIN HURT ME. MOTHERFUCKIN SCARRED ME! LOOK AT ME!” He points to his wrists. Purple blood is draining down. “I WOULDN’T HAVE DONE THIS IF HE DIDNT FUCKING NEGLECT ME AND ABUSE ME MENTALLY, SHIT, DOES LACK OF PHYSICAL CONNECTION TO YOUR CHILD COUNT AS PHYSICAL ABUSE? I SAY IT FUCKIN DOES. MENTAL AND PHYSCIAL ABUSE I’VE ENDURED FOR YEARS AND FOR WHAT?! TO BE LIKE THIS, TO FUCKING DESTROY MYSELF AND ISOLATE MYSELF AND GET HIGH ALL THE TIME TO NUMB MY GODDAMN THINKPAN SO I DON’T TAKE MY ANGER OUT ON OTHERS?! WHAT KIND of SHIT IS THIS, KARBRO?! EVERY TIME I WOULD SPEND TIME WITH HIM, ALL HE WOULD DO IS CRITICIZE ME AND TELL ME HOW TERRIBLE I AM. HOW COULD I EVER THINK FOR A MOTHERFUCKIN SECOND THAT I COULD HAVE EVER LOVED HIM? IT IS HIS MOTHERFUCKING FAULT I’M AL UP AND LIKE THIS. IT’S HIS FAULT I’M FUCKING CRAZY AND SPLIT AND CAN’T KEEP A STABLE THINKIN ON. THIS MOTHERFUCKER HAS FUCKIN RUINED ME, AND I’M ALL ALONE IN THIS SHIT. I’M ALL BY MY MOTHERFUCKING SELF! NO ONE FUCKIN GETS IT! AND IF THEY DO, THEY SURE AS SHIT DON’T CARE!” 

That triggers you a little bit. The fact that he thinks no one is there, that no one cares. NO ONE? SERIOUSLY?

“No one. No one cares? SERIOUSLY, GAMZEE? YOU REALLY THINK THAT NO ONE GIVES TWO SHITS ABOUT YOU? I FUCKING CARE, DIPSHIT, I FUCKINF CARE A LOT!” You’re crying now, with him. Your body is jittering.

“No, Karbro... you’re just gonna up and leave just like everybody else. You’re just gonna leave. You’ll get fuckin sick of me. You’ll get fuckin tired of me. AND HE’S THE REASON WHY I FUCKIN FEEL THIS WAY. IF HE HADN’T DONE THIS SHIT TO ME, MAYBE I’D MAKE MORE FRIENDS. I’D BE MORE OUT THERE, BRO. I WOULDN’T HAVE TO BURDEN YOUR ASS WITH MY SICK ASS PROBLEMS. YOU’D HE HAPPIER. I’D BE HAPPIER. FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT TO ANY OF THIS MOTHERFUCKING SHIT?” He claws at himself, crying hysterically. You fucking fall onto the floor and wretch up your food.

“He fuckin did this to me...” he kept repeating that. He rocks back and forth on his haunches. His eyes look so scared, so angry, so resentful. So much pain inside of this what-appears-to-be-chill stoner troll. So much fucking pain. It’s causing YOU pain. You just want to fucking MAKE IT GO AWAY. You HATE this. You HATE HIS LUSUS. You ball your fists up and scream.

“I’m never going to fucking leave you, dumbass! I couldn’t do that. Not even if I really fucking wanted to.”

He looks at you, crying hysterically still.

“Everything hurts, Karkat. Everything hurts...” he looks so skinny, you realize. Like he hasn’t eaten and his stomach is just eating itself. You fucking crawl over to him and cry next to him. He jolts and slams his fist into the wall on the other side of him, opposite of you.

“FUCK!” He yells. “I HATE HIM SO MUCH. FUCK HIM FOR DOING THIS TO ME. I’M MOTHERFUCKING DONE! I JUST want it to GO AWAY.” He holds his head between his hands, his knees bunched up. 

“He’s inside of me. I can’t kill him, because he’s already within. He’s already inside me. Even if his body decays... he’s always going to be here, haunting me.” He points to his chest, almost tearing into himself. “He’s always going to be in here, pummeling the anxiety.” He points to his head. “He’s always going to be in here, making me feel hate and twisting my whole personality around. It’s not just because I’m a fuckin highblood. The reason most Highbloods are so violent is probably cuz they all had shitty, evil, neglectful lusii. I bet that’s fuckin WHY.” He started crying into your shoulder, trembling. “He’s raped me emotionally. He’s FUCKING RAPED ME. I don’t feel clean. I don’t feel clean at all, Karkat. Not at all.” You wrap your hand in his and let your tears fall onto his cuts.

“Oh, you wanna know why I fucking ripped my flesh open and exorcised the hate for a little bit the other day? Him. He told me he was gonna come see me. He didn’t. But, he did yesterday...” he presses his finger into one of the cuts and laughs. “This is from all the pain he’s put me through.” 

You grab his hand and look him in his angry, piercing purple eyes. You tremble as you lean in, pressing your jittery lips to his cheek. Softly. Just trying to comfort him. He starts crying even harder. “I hate his face. I hate his voice. I hate his stupid personality. I hate that he doesn’t even realize he’s the worst, sorry PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR A LUSUS THAT I’VE EVER HEARD OF. ALWAYS LINGERING IN THE SEA, USING BULLSHIT TO DISTRACT ME. NEVER COMING TO ACTUALLY BE HERE WITH ME. HE BROUGHT ME TO THIS PLACE ONCE. Bunch of creatures I didn’t know. EVERYONE LOVED HIM. EVERYONE TOLD ME HE SEEMED LIKE A GREAT DAD. YOU KNOW HOW THAT FEELS? HOW CAN MOTHERFUCKERS JUST ASSUME ANYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING?! TELLING ME I’M UNGRATEFUL!?! THEY. DID. NOT. KNOW. MOTHERFUCKIN. ANYTHING. He used to get mad at me, right? For shit I didn’t know how to do, or shit that I didn’t do right enough. He’d criticize me on the minimal times we went out in public together. Make sure everyone FUCKING HEARD. They’d all stop, and stare. WHEN HE WOULD TELL ME HE LIKES THE MUSIC I WAS LISTENING TO, I WOULD START TO HATE THE MUSIC. THE TIMES HE WAS ACTUALLY THERE, HE WOULD STAND OVER ME AND MAKE me feel so fucking small.” He sniffles and leans back against the wall. “I’m too depressed to fuckin feed myself. I feel like I’m gonna start rotting away, Karbro. Motherfuckin wilt like a pathetic little motherfuckin annual flower. It’s hurting so bad, bro. I’m tired...”

Everything he’s saying is so fucking intense.   
You know you can’t shoosh him out of this. He has to calm down himself. You’ll be there every step of the way, though. You didn’t realize how fucking SHITTY GOATDAD WAS. You knew he was a worthless piece of neglectful shit, but the intensity of Gamzee’s words.... That piece of shit shouldn’t have ever taken him from the mothergrub. Ever. He deserves so much better than this. Your heart was in pieces, you lean against him as he breaks down, like his energy was spent, like he was too tired to care. He got a lot out... you are so glad you fucking came over. He’s too unstable.

Karkat stays by you the whole time. You feel the cuts deep in your skin. It made you feel relief for a moment, now it just makes everything hurt more. Your stomach doesn’t even hurt, but your whole body feels wrong, like you should eat something. You don’t really have much motivation, though. You feel his hand squeeze yours. He’s afraid to pap you. To shoosh you. He knows how psycho you can get. Oh, yes, so delightfully violent. You really just want to bash someone’s skull in. Not Karkat’s, though. Never Karkat’s. He’s too precious to you. You slowly grab onto him and pull him into you. He shudders against you. He’s fucking scared.

“Stop... bein... so motherfuckin... SCARED, bro. I’m not going to FUCKING lay a measly CLAW on your ass. Unless it’s in a literal sense. I’m not going to hurt you, bro. I won’t ever hurt you. Not you, best friend.” You grip his shoulders, your eyes piercing into his. He’s still shaking. You lean down and he flinches slightly. You press your lips to his. He hesistates a second, because he’s nervous as fuck. But you can rip that outta him. You kiss him harder. He kisses back. You firmly hold him. “Best friend.”

That’s all you say. He looks at you, his anxiety weaning. You hold him close, so close. You love him so... You could never hurt him. Ever. Ever...

“Thank you for coming. I was about to cull someone.” You laugh weakly, trying to make it a joke, but it was a failed attempt and he knew you were serious underneath.

“Just.... please. Don’t see him anymore. Please. You need to get out of here. This place is too toxic for you.” 

“I love the beach, though.” You say, matter-of-factly.

“I-I know...” he looks down.

You tilt his chin up. He still looks nervous.

“Stop bein so afraid of me, best friend. I’m not going to cull you. If I wanted to, you’d be dead already. I told you... I’m never going to motherfucking do that, okay? You are too precious to me. Too precious.” You feel this twinge inside of yourself, like you weren’t hurtin enough as it is. Because if your best friend was afraid of you, what the hell does that make you?

“I-I’m not afraid of You. I’m just afraid of... what you might do. To others. To yourself. Yourself, especially. Fuck everyone else. I’m worried about you. I can believe you’re crazy now, I’ve witnessed it before. Multiple times. But I just... I just feel like when you’re left alone too long you fester. You’re festering inside of yourself. And I can’t pull you out every time. I don’t think I can.” You start to cry. Again. He cries, too. You pull him into your lap, he is careful to not brush against your cuts. He looks at them solemnly.

“Goddamn it, Gamzee. Why did you have to have him as a lusus? You deserve so much better. So, so much better.” He pulls on your shirt and sniffles into it. So motherfuckin cute. He brings out some kind of softness in you that you can’t describe. Even when you’re off the rails, batshit crazy, he can somehow manage to calm you down. You’re convinced this little fucker is the love of your life and no one else will ever take his goddamn place. You grab his hands. You’re still shaking. Crying. “Karkat...” you whisper.

He looks up at you.

Oh, fuck.

The feeling.

The feeling of safety.

The feeling of unconditionality.

It’s back again. You love him so much. You wish you could just up and tell him. But not yet. Your heart is pounding. All the scary noises dulled down. But when you close your eyes, all you see is bones. Dead bodies. Spiders in crannies of places, their legs retracting back into the hole they crawled out of. You wished you could’ve slept sooner. It was scary to be you. It really was.

Karkat cries, and you notice he threw up on your floor. It makes your stomach turn. You sweetheart threw up his food because of you. You feel terrible. You wished the voices would stop. You didn’t want to eat the slime tonight. It just made you shove everything away like it didn’t matter. You needed to feel this. But goddamn, you’ve felt fucking ENOUGH. You hate this feeling. You just want it to go away. Karkat. Karkat. Your Karkat. He’s here. Everything’ll be okay. Your love was here. He was here with you.

“Karkat.” You wait for him to look at you. He just grips onto you tightly like you’re going to run away and never return. You’d never do that to him.

“Karkat.”

He finally looks at you, his eyes are full of distress. “I’ll never leave you. I’ll never hurt you. No matter how angry I become. I’ll never take it out on you.” You kiss him on the forehead, letting tears slip out of your eye ducts again. Fuck. You keep reassuring him, just so he motherfucking knows. IF HE DOESN’T BELIEVE YOU.... well, you wouldn’t do anything. You wouldn’t. You grip him tighter, squeezing him against your body, breathing in his scent. He smelled like the heavens above, better than a messiah.

“You should get some rest,” Karkat stammers. You look down.

“I don’t think I can... every time I close my eyes, I see disturbing things.”

Karkat looks sullen as fuck. You do, too. “I’ll stay. I’ll stay. I promise I’ll stay with you.” He says, his voice still shaky.

“I feel like everyone‘s out to get me. I feel like all the nice things they say are just a facade to hide the fact that they want to see me suffer.”

Karkat sighs into you. “Whatever scary thought you have, I’ll be here to help you deal with it. Please, just... get some rest. Please. You need it.”


	7. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhhhh...... eheheh.... light BDSM, bro.... just like, lots of smut in this, the whole chapter is just sex. Uhoh, the haters are really gonna love the shit outta this :*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to pervert everything, I’m SORRY! Nah, I’m not.

Gamzee wakes up next to you, or rather, you wake up next to him, because you realize he’s still out. You helped him to his bed last night, washed his face and made him change his clothes. He was curled up next to you, holding you tightly, his face looked sad even though he was out cold. You hold him and look around his room. There’s dried blood all over his walls, and you sigh. This poor shitstain is so mentally fucked. You should just stay with him all the time to make sure he’s safe. Not that it would be much of a responsibility. You genuinely enjoyed his company and wanted him around you all the time. He had his problems, sure, but so does everyone, and he’s never taken them out on you. Not once. He may raise his voice, but he just does that. And you always yell. You’re always a grumpy asshole. You stroke his hair while he sleeps, his head resting on your shoulder, his face in your chest, his legs entangled around your waist. You grip him a little tighter and wrap your legs around him. It felt really good to do it. He lets out a soft moan in his sleep and moves his hands up to your neck and nuzzles his face in deeper. You’re so happy he finally fell asleep. He was probably awake for a couple days. Why didn’t he just fucking CALL you? You should’ve assumed his piece of shit lusus would set him off, somehow. You never understood why he would wait for him. He was so cruel to Gamzee. But then again, you knew he had a longing for a connection with his dad. He didn’t eat any slime last night, but somehow he calmed down. You had that effect on him.

He still twitched in his sleep, though, and sometimes he’d grip you more tightly for a second or two and start shaking and you’d have to shoosh him again. You really wished he could feel better. Be in a better place.

Gamzee began to stir and you continue to stroke his hair. You’ll always be here for him. He snakes out his tongue and licks your chest. You shudder in surprise but then again, it’s Gamzee. Why be surprised? He looks up at you sleepily, and grins, a little bit of rage still boiling in the back of his irises, but it’s quelled by his affection for you. It makes you feel really proud, even if you won’t admit it.

“Heeey, best friend.” The way he says that is so goddamn precious to you. You melt when he says it, and you always have, but you never showed it until now. You start to purr.

“Hey, fuckass.”

He giggles, reaching up to touch your face, sliding his body up so his face is inches away from yours. “Awww... you’re so motherfuckin adorable, Karbro. Gettin your purr on for me...” he strokes his hand gently across your cheek and his fingers graze across your lips. You lick his fingers affectionately. To be sweet to him. But of course he thinks it’s hot, so he sticks two fingers in your mouth and looks you in the eye the entire time. You roll your eyes at what a pervert he is, but you gladly suck on his fingers. Maybe you’re a pervert, too. Whatever. Fuck off.

He bites his lip and leans his head over to the side, resting it on his shoulder, still looking at you. You bite his fingers gently and he grins. He pulls them out of your mouth, covered with red saliva. He continues to look you in the eye while he slowly sucks your saliva off of his fingers.

“That’s nasty, you’re seriously disgusting. You gross ass freak.” You say that, but you kind of liked it. He seductively flicks his tongue in between his two fingers and curls it around one of them and licks upwards. Eye contact made this feel really dirty. Shit.

“Yeah, ain’t no different than me sucking it off your tongue...”

You chuckle. “Well, actually, smartass, there’s a huge difference.” You lean forward. “Because if you’re sucking it off my tongue, it’s warm.... fleshy... and it feels good for both of us... we can combine colors...” You’re awkward, but that’s cool, because he, as he likes to put it, “digs that shit.” He leans toward you, his lips inches apart from yours. You gulp. Why was he so addicting?

He pulls on the collar of your shirt, and you fall right into his kiss, his hair falling into your face. You move forward and onto his lap and he lets you, grabbing your sides with both hands as you wrap your arms around him. You grind against his bulge and he lets out a moan into your ear. You shudder as he grinds up against you, returning the favor, teasing your nook through clothes.

He starts stroking your hair as he kisses your neck. In between the kisses and soft bites, he grabs your chin and pulls it towards his lips, biting your jaw, neck, earlobe...

“Mmm... my precious little Karkat.”  
You liked it when he said your name like that. Honestly. It was really arousing, for some weird ass reason. You would be embarrassed, SO embarrassed, but you’ve already let him dominate you sexually, so why even be embarrassed at this point. Like, whatever. Plus, it felt amazing. He continues to grind up against you, slowly, painfully slow, and you can almost feel him inside of you, fucking you raw. The perks of being you: you don’t need excessive foreplay to get dripping wet for this fucker because he turns you on so fucking hard.  
Honestly, it was pretty embarrassing. But it felt too good to feel guilty about it.

He grips the back of your neck and holds you still, he looks into your eyes and gives you an evil grin. Right, he’s still sober. Shit.

“I can feel your arousal through layers of clothing. Why is that, hm?” He gets cocky. Smug little fuck.

“Hmm, I don’t know, maybe because you turn me on, idiot.” You emphasize your words dramatically to make him feel like an idiot for asking that question. But he already knows that. He just wants to get something out of you.

He thrusts up against you, still holding you in place, making you whimper a little. He continues to grin.

“Hm... but surely you couldn’t get that aroused by a simple,” he grinds into you harder, “flick of the hips.”

Ugh. He’s such an asshole. It makes you want to moan for him.

He trails his other hand down your stomach through your shirt, ripping through it with his claws. Goddamn it, Gamzee. He tears it off of you and tosses it away. He grips your bulge through your pants and squeezes. You bite your lip.

“And look at this...” he then moves his hand down and strokes your nook through your clothes, making you gasp and breathe faster, retracting his finger and showing you the red secretions dripping down.

“You’re soaked, and ruining a nice pair of pants. Thought you really liked them... what a damn shame...” his tone darkens. “Take them off.”

Your hands shake as you begin to undo your zipper, because fuck, he’s staring into your soul, and he looks so... hungry. He honestly terrifies you, but you still pitch a tent regardless. You slowly pull them off, down to your ankles.

“All the way off.” He growls.

You find it hard to move down and rip them off when he holding you like this. He’s making you struggle on purpose. You reach for the other pant leg, but you can’t get it off. You can’t reach it fully.

“Come on, Kar...” he strokes you again, through your underwear. He leans over and bites your neck before he pulls away and growls at you.

“What are ya waitin for? Just take them off.”

He was seriously a prick. Wow. You struggle to reach the pant leg again.

“Mmmm... you’re not trying hard enough. Maybe you don’t want what I have to offer you, then.”

You growl at him. His gaze pierces through you, and you submit a little more, your growl turning into a whine. Fuck.

“M-maybe I... don’t.”

He chuckles. “Liar.”

He rips your pant leg off and discards them somewhere, you don’t pay attention.

“Pathetic. Can’t even undress yourself. Weak little mutant.”

You know he was just teasing you, but you wonder if he legitimately wants to cull you right now. He proves you wrong by kissing you hard on the mouth, moaning into you, pulling you closer as his fingers tug at your boxers, demanding entrance to your sensitive parts.

“F-fuck... Gamzee... why...”

He nips at your bottom lip, causing blood to ooze out. He sucks on it, swirling his tongue in the small wound, swallowing the red.

“You taste so delicious, babe. I could just... devour you. Swallow you whole.” His finger trail up your stomach and to your neck. “I could cut you open and fuck your innards... make you purple on the inside.” You shudder. He’s so fucking terrifying. He grins. “Mmmm... but I like you better this way. Like red candy.”

He sucks on your neck, bruising your flesh... you moan and wrap your legs around his waist. He grinds up against you again. You moan louder.

“Sounds like you really motherfuckin want want I have to offer, don’t you?”

You whine.

He growls. “Say it.” His grip on you tightens.

You moan out, “make me, asshole.”

“Oh, love, I will. And by the time I’m through with you, you’re going to wish you were dead.”

That shouldn’t sound sexy, but it does. He has an odd sense of humor. An odd way of flirting. He scares you so much you get hard for him, and your nook oozes. Begs for penetration. He makes you feel like you’re in heat when it’s not even your cycle time. You want him to make you wish you were dead. You wanted to scream “kill me” while he’s fucking you to death. You unsheathe your genitalia from the confinements of the rest of your clothing and his soon follow. His bulge teases your nook but he doesn’t penetrate you. Instead, his hand wraps around your throat and he tilts your head back. His finger prods at the opening of your mouth, and you open it for him because you don’t want him to break your jaw off trying to enter.

“Good... mmm... very good... got you where I want you. Stick your tongue out.”

You oblige, albeit shakily. You look into his eyes, and his spits in your mouth. He growls at you, smirking evilly.

“Swallow. Like a good bitch.”

You heisitate, feeling the warm saliva drip down your throat, your head still tilted back. He wasn’t going to let you move.

“I said swallow it, bitch.”

You struggle to swallow with your head tilted so far back, but you manage, gasping for air afterwards. He chuckles.

“Mmyeah. Just like that.”

You choke out, “more... do it again. Please.”

He bites your tongue, causing a drip of blood to trail down your chin. You wince but moan. Masochistic desire sweeps through your veins. He bites his own lip, causing purple blood to drip out, he sucks it up into his mouth and spits on your tongue, combining the your blood colors together. Then he tilts your head forward a little, so it’s easier to swallow. But you don’t, because he’s shoving his tongue down your throat, all while he’s grinding up against you still. You wrap your arms around his neck as he chokes you with his tongue.

He asphyxiates you. You feel a little light headed. Then he stops. He pulls his tongue out, your saliva dripping from his tongue and clinging to your tongue until the string breaks apart. He sucks his tongue back in his mouth and swallows.

“My perfect little mutant. That’s it. Now kiss me.”

He leans out of your reach, so you struggle to make it to his lips. His cock grazes against your nook, radiating heat and twitching, eager to get inside. You moan, rubbing against it lightly, feeling yourself get wetter. You lean up towards him, trying to reach his lips. He pushes you back down, grinding harder, making you barely able to move from the overwhelming amount of pleasure you can’t stop thinking about.

“Come on, Karkat... what are you waiting for?” His voice is filled with lust.

You growl and climb back up, onto his cock. He barely has enough time to stop you before you’re sinking in, filling yourself up with him.

“Ohhh... ahhh...” you are shuddering. Sensations screaming everywhere. In your stomach, your internals, your chest, your insides feel electric. You start to move, taking him in more. Your hands snake up to his neck and you drop your head into his chest. He growls at you and grips your hips, slowly thrusting up into you.

“Pathetic...” he moans.

You start to ride him, looking up at him, your arms still wrapped around him. His eyes gleaming down at you, a powerful, lustful gaze never leaving you. It makes it feel so much better. How much bigger he is then you. His bone structure, his jawline, his neck, his wild hair, his beautiful, perfect horns, striking from this angle. He’s so hot. You’re way too into him. Fuck. Everything about him turns you on. He’s so tall... he grins at you and digs his nails into your hips as he starts to thrust harder. You’re already wrecked, moaning uncontrollably, shivering with every touch. He leans your body back for easier access and penetrates as deep as he can, leans over you and bites into your neck while you moan his name, bouncing you on his dick, relishing in your agonizingly delicious pleasure.

He moves, holding onto you and keeping himself inside of you as he picks you up and moves you off of the bed. You hold onto him tightly, looking into his eyes and kissing him passionately, your hands on his face, your legs intertwined with each other and wrapped around his waist. He carries you into another room, one you haven’t ever really been in. There’s blacklights and bones and chains all over. He kisses you, making you close your eyes trustingly into it. He reaches over, firmly holding onto you with his other hand. He slips you off of his cock, but still holds onto you, grinding his leg against your own bulge as he pushes you back into a desk. He moves your arms to your back. His hands wrap around your wrists, and you feel him tie something around them. Oh, fuck. What is he doing?

You struggle a little, trying to see behind you, but he keeps distracting you with his lips tangling into yours. You feel the cold hard wood press into your lower back as he keeps you against the desk. You shudder as he finishes tying you and turns you around, his bulge teasing your hole from behind. His hand gripping onto your wrists.

“W-What did you just... do?” You feel a little uncertain, but you know he won’t hurt you. He wraps his other hand around your throat. You feel his breath on your neck, in your ear... you press into him harder, because you want him to fuck you.

“You’ll see...” He reaches over and grabs a fucking... collar? Leash? What the hell. It’s leather and it’s cold when he wraps it around your neck. He nips at your earlobe as he tightens it around your throat, but not too tight. Just the right amount of pressure. He chuckles and then slaps your ass, tugging on the leash chain a little.

“Are you scared?” He whispers into your ear.

“N-no...” you moan.

He licks your neck. “Good... although I wouldn’t mind if you were...”

He pulls you over to a different area, and you realized how immobile you were right now. He pulls you by the leash, into his lips, and you hungrily oblige. You try to reach up, to hold him, to straddle him, something, fuck, but you realize you really can’t, because he’s tied you up. Fuck. He grinds against your nook again. You whine and he backs into a wall, turning you around, sitting on a leather chair. He pulls you into him by your tethered hands and lifts your leg up so he can penetrate you, setting you on his lap. You lean back against him as he leans your head back into his teeth, gripping the leash tightly, squeezing your neck as he fucks into you again, digging his claws into your leg. Fuck. This felt so amazing. You had no idea he was into this shit. But then again, you weren’t very surprised.

He sticks his fingers in your mouth and you suck on them while you start to moan again because he finds a rhythm inside of you and it dances so perfectly, so sensually, on your insides. You try to scream, but he grips your mouth shut so you can let it out. He pulls on the leash with his teeth as he thrusts deep and you lick his hand hungrily, muffled moans and screams being sedated by his grip. You look around at his room, seeing all different kinds of weird kinky shit hanging off the walls. Skulls and graffitied walls... he’s fucking nuts, you realize. You love it.

He moves his hand away from your mouth, because he really wants to hear you, now.

You love how he moves inside you, how full it feels. how every nerve inside of you is electrified. 

You always fantasized about getting fucked... you’ll admit it. You often wondered how it felt. You’d wonder if it was as good as your romantic movies made it out to be. The music playing, the passionate kissing, how the girl was in a constant state of bliss. And one night, you woke up wet, your sheets stained red, because you had a dream that it was Gamzee making you feel like the girl. That was a while ago. But it felt so good. You had no idea why at the time. You were embarrassed by the fact that you thought of having sex with your moirail, your MOIRAIL. I mean, seriously. What the fuck. He was a total idiot. He was a stupid stoner idiot that wore creepy clown makeup and barely ever dressed in jeans. He talked like a dumbass, and his raps were terrible. But you supposed he was just having fun. And he was high as a kite. And his hugs were really soft and comforting. You always wondered why. It was honestly disturbing for a bit. Every time you saw him after that, at least for a little while, you would glance down at his crotch while he was talking, and you don’t think he noticed, but you would just... wonder. And then you’d look away, flustered. He probably just associated it with you being your usual, crabby self. You always wondered how it would feel.

Now you’re orgasming in unison with him while he has you tied up in a creepy ass room as he whispers dirty shit into your ear, and you realize that this is way better than you ever thought it could be. You spill red all over him, including yourself, and you moan again as he releases inside of you, deep inside... you don’t mind. You like the feeling of it squirting inside of you, making you feel fuller, and slowly dripping out. It makes you feel closer to him. He pulls your head back by the leash and kisses you passionately, your tongues grazing together. He turns you around so you’re sitting across his lap, your legs falling off the side of the chair and your head pressed up against his chest, still inside of you. He grabs your throat gently, rips the collar off, rips the ties off of your wrists, and just rests his hand on your bare skin, kissing you.

“You... fucking... suck... soooo hard.” You grumble, but then you moan softly as he kisses your neck tenderly.

“Why were you screamin, then?” He groans slyly into your ear, his scent lingering in your nostrils and making you want to merge your bodies into one. He smells so fucking good.

“Mmm... because you know how to fuck me... moron.” You moan into his mouth as he tilts your chin up more.

“Mhmm... yeah, that’s right. Look at you, bein all honest...” he tenderly rubs your chin, smiling down at you with lidded eyes, before continues fo hungrily make out with you. Fuck, you could do this for hours, honestly. In between kisses, he adds, “I really like how you scream for me.”  
Fuck... Honestly, you really liked it, too. 

“Your vulnerability is one of the most miraculous, beautiful things I’ve ever witnessed.” Honestly, he’s super cheesy. You fucking tell him.

“You are absolutely the most cheesiest, dorkiest, idiotic clown I’ve ever met. Fuck, I mean, seriously... I mean, who the hell even raised you to be this way?” Oops. That was a little insensitive.

“No one.” He laughs a little. “Not a single motherfucker. This personality is all natural, baby.” This idiot.

You kiss him again. He slides his bulge out of your nook. It tingles. “Mm.”

You lean down and suck the cum off of his stomach and thighs. And his bulge. You graze his nook with your tongue and he shudders. Maybe you’ll make him dripping wet in that area sometime. He picks you up and sets you on the floor after you’re finished. He does the same thing to you, but he lifts your legs up onto his shoulders and grips your hips while he does it. He swirls his tongue a little more than you did, because he is fucking insatiable. You are so red for this clown. And you like his pretty, bare face. You look down at him as he sucks the cum off your inner thigh. He lingers longer, for the purpose of giving you hickeys. You grab onto his horns. He shudders. They were really sensitive. You stroke them. He moans softly and you stroke up to the tip and rub it in a circular motion. You love his horns. They’re so beautifully shaped and such an attractive length.

“Mmm... Karkat...” he leans forward so you can reach them better. You slide down underneath him, and pull his face down to kiss you while you continue to stroke. He moans into your mouth and softly lifts your legs up onto his waist, demanding you wrap them around him. His lips part from yours with a sweet moan, and he looks at you with loving eyes. You reach your mouth up to one of his horns, pulling his head down so you can have better access. You stroke it with your tongue, and he shivers.

“F-fuck... ahhh...~” the noises he’s making are so cute. “K-keep this up a-and... and I might make you c-cum again...” he shivers above you, vulnerability sweet as his Faygo drinks.

You honestly wouldn’t mind that.

You can’t get enough of him physically.

You start to suckle on one horn while you stroke the other. He struggles to not collapse into you. You pull him down onto you and flip him over, getting on top of him. You continue to suck on his horn. He grips onto your back, and you can feel his bulge press into your thigh. You shift position, and tease it with your nook. He gasps. You move to the other horn and start to lick that one. He is writhing softly beneath you, shaking, breathing unsteadily.

“F-fuck... Karkat...” he grinds against you. You just came, but you figure it wouldn’t hurt to cum again. And you know he realllly wouldn’t mind it.

“Fuck me.” He says. You proceed to slide his bulge into your nook again. He’s shuddering and his breathing is hitching in his throat, and his thrusts upwards into you, going deep inside. Pure bliss. You lean back, letting his horns go, you hands steadying on the floor by his legs, moving your hips and up and down on his cock, starting to ride him. Soon you’re picking up the pace, because you can’t get enough of this feeling. His arms are outstretched on the floor above his head, curling around each other, and his eyes are lidded and his teeth are biting into his bottom lip as he looks up at you. Your insides are already a little sore from the first time, but in such an intoxicating way. You lean your head back, pushing him in as deep as he can go, all the way in.

His bulge fits so perfectly inside of you, and you can’t help but ride him faster. He’s letting out moans and sighs of pleasure and lust as he lets you take control and he just lays there, controlling the urge to grab onto you and fuck you until you see stars. You can see it in his eyes.

You fuck him harder, wetness spilling out of your nook and dripping down on the floor. Your eyes roll back into your head as you moan continuously, feeling him inside of you made you feel so much better. So much better. You hear how wrecked he sounds, and you look down at him. He moves his hands to your hips and helps guide you down onto him. He can’t help it, he starts to thrust into you, and you scream. He likes that... he fucks you harder, gripping you so tight. He licks his lips and grins before he moans and cums again. You cum shortly after. You can’t believe how good this feels.

He grinds softly while still inside of you, pulling you down by your hips into his lips, kissing you as passionately as he can, the feeling of how rough he can get lingering inside of you.

Between tangles of lips and soft moans, he opens his mouth to speak. And it shocks you when he says it. But it just rolls off his tongue so genuinely, and it dances in your mind continuously, making you feel warm.

Four simple words.

Just...

“Fuck, I love you.”


	8. Elixir

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat’s angy. Gam comforts him. Such cheese.

.

Karkat left your hive to get some supplies. But you were chill with it. Whatever, bro. You supposed you were matesprits now? Yeah.... That was bitchtits. You never thought you’d ever have that little grumpy fucker. You always thought he kind of hated you. Guess not.  
He returned not long after, though. Wasn’t gone for long. He set the bags down and he was about to empty the contents, but you slinked your way over to him and grabbed him from behind. It startled the shit out the little motherfucker. He jumped and slapped you, but it didn’t hurt too bad.

“SHIT, WHAT THE FUCK! You fucking retarded bulgelicking, juggalo shitstain. You fucking SCARED me, why do you fucking DO shit like that? You fucking piss me off so much. Fuck.”

You just chuckle. You loved startling him. And you thought it was cute how his face flushed red. When he was really mad, his whole motherfuckin body would start shakin. Some motherfuckers thought he was a dick, but you knew he was soft inside. They didn’t matter, anyway. You turn him around. He gets mad again.

“What? Can’t you leave me alone for a fucking second? I have some shit to do.”

He didn’t push you away, though. So you just grin more. “Bro.... bro.... bro... heheheheh...” you start laughing, because this shit is reeeaaally startin to kick in. He just looks at you like you’re the dumbest thing in the damn universe but you don’t give a motherfuckin shit. “Bro... hehehh... you gots ta try this shit out.” You start laughing again and drop your head down a little, closing your eyes, trying to hold back your laughter.

“Gamzee... how fucking high are you right now? Jesus...” he crossed his arms.

“Not that fuckin high, man...” you giggle. “Everything feels motherfuckin fuzzy and shit, though. You look sad, c’mere bro.... c‘mere...” you reach for him and pull him into a hug. He huffs against you, his arms still crossed.

“C’mon...” you try to pull him onto the couch. He sighs and lets you after he realizes hesitating is only gonna make you wanna push him more.

“Ugh. You’re so annoying. Why do I let you do this stupid shit to me?” You collapse onto the couch, and he falls on top of you. You grin up at him and place a smooch on his nose. His cheeks brighten and he tries to act all like he isn’t likin it, but you know he motherfuckin does. You like life like this. Just chillin with your Karbro. You could spend so many sweeps with this fucker. Even though he was bein a grump right now. Didn’t much matter.

“Cheer up, best friend. You wanna watch a romcom or somethin?” You tease him. “I know they kinda help you get outta your lil funk.”

He just groans and presses his face into your chest, going limp. “No... no. It’s fine. I’m just.... ugh. I don’t know.”

You stroke your motherfuckin hand on his cute ass soft cheek and kiss it. Tryna cheer him up. He groans again and then wraps his arms around you.

“I hate you.”

You chuckle and it rumbles throughout him. “No, you don’t.”

He sighs dramatically. Then he curls up around you and you return the affection. After a few minutes of deep sighs and grumpiness, he starts to rant, “okay. So... I saw Dave when I was out. And I don’t even hate him, or anything, okay, SERIOUSLY, it’s just that... I don’t know. He started acting weird around me and he kept fucking FOLLOWING ME even though I told him to fucking go away. He was starting to piss me the fuck off. He kept walking beside me and occasionally bumping me, and making jokes and shit. Just being his usual unbearable self. Being a straight up asshole. Like, insulting me but in a flirtatious type of way, or what the fuck ever. I don’t fucking know. The guy’s fucking stupid. He has like, zero brain cells and all he does is act like he’s cooler than fucking everyone. Like, in a smug way, you know. So he uses his smugness on me, when I was reaching up to grab an item off a fucking shelf he would graze his arm up mine slightly and reach higher than me and grab it for me, right? THEN, this fucker holds IT UP IN THE AIR SO I CAN’T REACH IT, WAVING IT AROUND. JUST BEING A FUCKING ASSHOLE. I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF BUT HE DOESN’T TAKE ME SERIOUSLY. I’M NOT ACTING PISSED BECAUSE I LIKE THE ATTENTION, okay? He’s literally too thick in the thinkpan, I truly believe his pan is more rotted than yours, he doesn’t pick up on cues and CLEAR INSTRUCTION TO FUCK OFF, or maybe he’s just too narcissistic and busy fucking himself in the ass while his ego screams ‘ohhh yeah, harder, daddy,’ to give a fucking shit! I don’t even fucking know. FUCK HIM, though. Anyway, I got the fuck out of there. He tried to continue his mind-numbing interaction with me but I fucking dodged him. I hid from him until he gave up. Then I fucking left.” He huffs out angrily, shaking a little. He wasn’t motherfuckin finished up in this bitch, though.

“Also... I told him, FUCKING TOLD HIM, I’m SEEING SOMEONE. He is way too fucking retarded, I can’t even begin to comprehend the depths of his stupidity, it makes me feel like I have a fucking DISEASE or something...” he shudders angrily. You can’t help but feel a little upset about this Dave motherfucker, Karbro’s YOURS. But it ain’t nothin to sweat... you think. And it makes your bloodpusher twinge with a little bit of pride at the fact that he said he was seeing someone. You were a thing. You just listen to him rant, and give him a kiss. Normally shuts his ass up.

“Ugh. Why are you so fucking affectionate and cute.... I hate you so much.” He says, reaching up to wrap his arms around your neck as he deepens the kiss. He retracts, though.

“What the hell is that taste in your mouth?”

You chuckle. “Uh... I mixed up a miraculous pie... I added a secret ingredient.”

He rolls his eyes. “What is it?”

“Heh... I mixed the wicked elixir into the miracle pie, and it created somethin... motherfuckin.... sublime... god tier miraculous wicked shit. I can’t believe how motherfuckin sick this shit is...” you start gigglin.

He facepalms. “I seriously question why I even fucking hang out with you at all. You’re so fucking stupid.”

You chuckle loudly, his facial expressions are so motherfuckin funny. He’s so goddamn cute. He looks at you angrily, but you kiss him again. “Chill the motherfuck out about that Dave motherfucker, bro, it ain’t be meanin shit, I’m a protect yo ass... I promise. Heheh.” You wink at him. He pulls away, all crabby.

“I don’t NEED you to protect me, you pan-rotted idiot. I can handle this shit myself. If he fucking touches me, I will KICK HIS ASS. I will NOT hesitate. Stop acting like I’m so fragile.”

You reach up to grab his wrists and softly massage his hands, circular motions. “Hey, hey, bro... chill. It’s all good up in here. I’m just playin wit you. I know you ain’t too fragile...” you lean up and kiss his neck tenderly. “I know you ain’t a motherfucker to be messed with. Can straight up blow motherfuckers away wit yo bare hands... don’t fuck with Karbro. He’s comin, oh, shiiiit! Watch out, motherfuckers.” You chuckle to yourself as you tease him. You meant it, though. He huffs again. He kisses you and bites your bottom lip in annoyance.

“Whatever...” he blushes.

“Bein all serious n shit, bro, I thinks that you are tough as shit. And I ain’t all up and motherfuckin sayin that shit to make ya feel weak, or whatever, bro. But,” you kiss his neck again, getting a soft sigh of pleasure as he untenses a little. “I feel like I should be a lil protective of my Karbro... just lemme know if y’all need help in havin a motherfucker dealt with. We in this shit together. And I ain’t likin it when you’re all up and upset bout some motherfuckers what ain’t worth sweatin over.”

He looks you in the eye and sighs. “Okay... whatever. Thanks for caring, fuckass. I am pretty pissed off about this asshole. Who the fuck does he think he is?”

You kiss him deeply. “Ain’t me, that’s for damn sure.”

He lets out a soft moan into your mouth.

“Yeah... you’re right. He isn’t. And he never fucking will be. I just hope he just fuckin stops already.”

“Well if he doesn’t, I have ways of getting motherfuckers quiet.” You continue to kiss him, pulling him closer. He ignores the taste in your mouth. Maybe it wasn’t that bad. Karbro shudders slightly when you say that.

“Don’t kill Dave.”

“Only if he touches you.” You chuckle. 

You pull away slightly and stroke his hair. “Yo... you wanna try this shit out?”

“What shit?”

You point to the pie tin on the coffee table. He grimaces.

“Ugh... fuck no. Are you retarded? Of course you are, I already knew that. I felt sick that one time I did it. Plus, I don’t want to become as pan-rotted as you.”

“Awww, c’moooon, Karbroooo...” you grab the pie tin, licking it straight out of the tin and letting it rest on your tongue, teasing him with it. He shoves you.

“No, you moron. I can deal with you being stupid, I can’t deal with me being stupid.”

So, you swallow the shit. “Shit’ll calm ya down, bro. Reeeeaaaallly chill you the motherfuck out.”

He leans into your arms, sighing as you dip a finger in it and lick it off, your tongue curling around your digit dramatically, making sure he was watchin. He huffs again.

“Ugh...” he sits up. You distend your tongue at him again, the sopor nearly dripping down onto the couch.

“Ugh. Gross. That’s gonna drip. But...” he sighs deeply, closing his eyes before reopening them.

He leans forward. His cheeks are flushed and his eyed are lidded as he looks up at you. He bites his bottom lip for a second before he licks a drip off your tongue. “If this makes me feel weird, I’m going to fucking bite your bulge off and shove it up your nook and sew your nook fucking shut.” He sucks on your tongue gingerly, swallowing your concoction.

You retract your tongue and grin at him. “Sounds painful, bro.”

“Uh, yeah, that’s kind of the point, fucktard.” He grabs you by your horns, pulls your head down, and kisses you deeply, remnants of sopor and the wicked motherfuckin elixir combining with the sweet taste of him. Mmm. You lean into the kiss more, enjoying the feeling of his hands gripping your horns as you slip him the tongue.

After a couple minutes of sloppy makeouts, he pulls away and looks into your eyes. He looks up at your horns, and studies your face. You just give him a stoned grin. He gives one back. Not as goofy, but he looks way more chilled. He laughs a little bit.

“I think I’m feeling this.... fuck... you really suck. Peer pressuring ass.” He reaches his hands up to cup his face while he leans back into the sofa, giggling a little. You lean back beside him, and wrap an arm around his shoulder. Classic motherfuckin move.

“Lightweight motherfucker.” You tease.

“Psh, shut up, idiot... hahaha! You may be right. I’m just not used to it like you, I’m surprised it even affects your rotted pan at all at this point with the amounts of this shit that you consume, seems like you’d be completely braindead!” He starts laughing. You laugh with him. It’s nice to see him in an elevated mood. All of a sudden, he grabs you by the shoulders.

“Dude. Dude. We should lay on the floor. I feel like it’s calling to me or something. I’ve been on the couch too long. The floor is whispering ‘come hither’... we should listen to this fucktard.”

You start to fucking explode in laughter. “Bro yous feelin like the floor’s all motherfuckin speakin to your ass?! Callin out yo motherfuckin name.... you better up and listen to that motherfucker, I hear if you listen to the floor it’ll grant ya wishes n shit.” You were just fuckin with him, but it was cute to see his reaction.

“You’re so full of shit, you fucking retard. Let’s do it! I bet it’s lying to us.”

He gets up and grabs onto your hands, pulling you off the couch. You stagger a lil, but you let him take you. You feel only slightly woozy, but it’s all good. Hells yeah. He giggles and looks up at you as he’s walking you over to the part of the floor he wants to all lay down on. “Sh-shit... why are you fucking tall, man? Why’s everyone fucking taller than me? Why are you so super tall though?” He strokes your chest in a flirty way with a single finger, and laughs again. Seein Karkat high was truly somethin to behold. This motherfucker... heheh. You lean down to kiss him.

“You just a short lil star monkey, ain’t no big deal, brother.”

“Whatever.”

He lays down on the floor, sprawls the fuck out. You sprawl out beside him. “It is a big deal... I’m so short, no one takes me seriously.” He slurs his words a lil. “Everyone thinks it’s fun to pick on me... you, Dave, everyone... fucking assholes.”

You lean over and kiss him. “Bro, I fuckin love your height, you bein you is the wickedest pimpinest shit around, bro! Damn!”

“You’re just saying that... because you’re so frustratingly tall and hot... I like how tall you are, though. Still pisses me off, but it doesn’t piss me off as much as those other tall fuckers. Fuck them all. Douchebags. Fuuuuuck theeeeem aaaalll... you’re really attractive, I like you a lot, I like you how make me feel and I like you a lot.”

“Shit, bro, that’s the sweetest motherfuckin thing you ever done said that pulsed through my ear canals into my thinkpan. You really sweetheart under that rough exterior, bro.”

He laughs and slaps his knee. “Fucking whatever, dude! Shut up. You’re stupid and your face is stupid.” He looks away from you dramatically. “Okay, okay, fine... I like your face. Shut up. Whatever, fuck you. Creepy ass clown.”

You start laughin.

“Bro..... I just had a wicked thought.”

He looks over at you, a dumb grin on his face.

“What’s that, fucktard?”

“Yo, like... okay, get this shit.... bouta blow your motherfuckin thinkpan, just busy that shit wide open.... so yo, like, what if motherfuckin horns, what be all up on ya head n shit, were actually those honk honk motherfuckers I have layin around, likes what the clowns use?”

You look at him seriously. He just bursts into giggle fits.

“Dude.... you’d look so fucking stupid! And every time you bump one of them on a fucking door entrance or they get touched, they’ll fucking honk!”

“Broooo! Exactly! You can be all up and motherfuckin strokin my horns and like... bein all into it n shit.... then, bro, all of a sudden.... honk honk. Fuckin sexy shit. Shit would be pure magic. The horns know some shit, bro. Honk em and hear their truth.” You lean your horns toward him, and Karkat fucking keels over, dying of laughter. You liked him when he let loose. Damn. Tense little motherfucker, this one.

“Holy shit! What if I squeezed em hard enough they would honk? You’re a fucking weird ass clown, maybe it’ll work.”

You know there’s a horn laying not too far from you, so while he grabs onto your horns, you reach back behind you, grabbing it. When he squeezes your horns, you honk it, and he fuckin jumps. He stares at you, his mouth agape.

“What the fuuuuck, dude! You have to be messing with me. What the fuck.” He takes a step back, looking at your horns.

“Seriously, no way was that real. You’re messing with me.”

“Nah, bro, I think you motherfuckin honked em. Ain’t never happened before, bro, guess you gots a magic touch!”

He looks down at his hands, gasping. “No fucking way.” Then he drops his hands and looks behind your back. He pulls the horn out of your hand.

“You fucker, dude! I’m not used to this stuff!” He throws the horn.

You grin at Karkat, and slither your tongue up his face. He jolts in surprise.

“Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?!” Wipes his face where you licked it. 

You fall onto the floor, holding your stomach, dying of laughter.

“Brooooo...” Shiiiiit. This was fun.   
Karkat lays down next to you again, still gigglin. “Dude... this stuff better not rot my brain. Fuck you and your stupid, odd, clown charm... agh... fuck. This shit makes me feel happy. Why does it do that?”

He looked like he already knew what you were gonna say. “Miracles.”

He facepalms, but he’s smiling. “Idiot. Hey... can I ask you something?”

You don’t worry too much about the question. It’s alllllll chill.

“Did you mean what you said the other night?”

You reach over and stroke his hair out of his eyes, looking into them. Beautiful shade of red. “Yeah, brother. I meant what I up and said. Shit, kinda just slipped out. Sorry, bro.”

He blushes and growls at you. He grabs onto your shirt and pulls you closer. “Shut up. Don’t apologize. It was nice to hear. I... uh... I fucking love you, too, okay?” He says the last part faster. He doesn’t like to admit shit.

“That’s motherfuckin beautiful, Karbro. Heh. Sick as fuck to witness you all bein down with the clown.”

Karkat groans. “I AM NOT DOWN WITH THE CLOWN, FUCKER.”

“What’s that, bro? Did you say you’re a clownfucker?”

He shoves you. “Oh, slick, wise ass. Real fucking slick.”

You smile wide as hell, because damn, you feel so much... feeling, for this brother. Gettin you all jumbled up and you don’t know how to even put it into words.

“Ah, well thank you, bro.”

“I was being sarcastic... shit. Is your ego big or are you just dumb? Both?”

You pull him on top of you. He turns red.

“Goddamn it, you control freak.” He leans down and whispers in your ear. “Why don’t you get on top of me?”

You throw your hands up in defeat. “Alright, alright, bro. I surrender.” He leans back, grabs you by the shirt, and pulls you close to him. He sits up taller so he can tilt your chin up and kiss you and act more in control. You don’t mind gettin down with that. Don’t mind at all. You wrap your arms around his neck and lean down so he can feel taller, and he leans down to kiss you. Kind of an awkward position, but if it makes him happy, you gonna be vibin with it.

“I fucking love you.” Karkat says, grinning down at you. You wouldn’t mind letting him top the shit outta you. Or just piling the shit out of you. Whichever, all of the above, man. He finally just flat out said it without acting hard.

“That’s real pimp of you to say, bro... pimpinest shit ever.”

He sighs into your mouth, “you’re dumb. Goofiest idiot ever. But... I really, really love it.” You really didn’t know why he felt this way about you, but it made you feel good.


	9. 💜

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Idk I wrote this fast, I’m working up to different situations

You kiss Gamzee, taking control. Sopor still kind of flooding through you. What the shit, seriously. This shit was kind of awesome, though. You smeared his facepaint and it got all over you, you probably looked like a clown at this point, but you didn’t really care right now. You hated to admit it, but you really found him addicting. You melt when he wraps his arms around your neck, letting you pull him close, stroking his bulge through his pants. He pants into your mouth.

“Red for you...” he moans out.

You kiss him harder, your nose scrunching up in an angry but passionate way. How dare he be so fucking cute. Shit, you hate him so much. Stupid clown. You hate him so much, you pull him into your lap. He’s taller, but he leans down so you can still kiss him. Fucking asshole. You run your hands through his messy, wild hair, and pull away from his lips so you can bite into his neck.

“K-Karkat...”

You liked to hear that, goddamn it...

You grab onto his neck and continue to bite into it, more passionately, and his body tenses as you feel his bulge rub up against your thigh. You had no idea why you kept doing this.

Hmm, I don’t know, idiot, maybe because it felt really good?

Whatever.

We’re all addicted to... SOMETHING, right?

Are you seriously admitting that you’re addicted to this idiot clown? Oh, god...  
But the way he reciprocates the neck bites... why would you even complain about it? You lean into him as he grinds up against you. You grab him by the throat, gently, and look him in the eye. He looks so calm, serene... you actually smile at his goofy face. You loved the way his dimples shown through his makeup, the way his eyes wrinkled slightly when he smiled, the way his smile was a little crooked. Goddamn it! You plant a kiss on his pale grey skin. You run your bulge against his nook through his pants. He looks at you, almost in an inviting way.

“Is... is it okay if I...” you brush up against it again.

He shudders and leans into your ear, kissing it lightly. “Of course, Karbro... I’m yours... ain’t nothin to be embarrassed over...”

Ugh. “Y-yeah, whatever! Fuck you! I was just-“ he stops you short with a kiss. Fuck, you hated him. Seriously.

“Get your fucking pants off, then.” You demand. His eyes are blown with lust, and serenity. It’s beautiful to see. You never thought he’d submit to you, since he was more of the fiesty type. But perhaps that was a misjudgment... most definitely.

He slowly pulls them off, discarding them behind you. He seemed only a tad bit shy, but that wasn’t really like him.

“Hey, Karbro... I’ve never done it... this way, before.”

You grin at him. “Ha, neither did I, until your clown ass fucked up our quadrants.”

“Heh... sorry about that, bro.”

You lean over to kiss him. “No, you’re not, fuckass.”

You slip your pants off, and he reaches for your shirt as you’re pulling it off. “Let me.” He gently lifts it off, helping you get rid of it. So helpful. You roll your eyes and do the same to him, admiring the curves of his body, even though he was the skinniest shit you’ve ever seen. You run your fingertips over a few scars on his chest, and he looks at you trustingly, barely wincing. You wished he wasn’t so self destructive. It kind of broke your heart, even though you hated to admit it. He lifts your hand up to his face instead, distracting you from the scars. He nuzzles into your hand, rubbing his scent on you and giving you a kiss on your palm. This fucker. You pull him closer to you, his arms wrapping around your lower back, his face resting into your neck, kissing you gently. You press your bulge to his nook, teasing the hole. He bites into your shoulder. Fucking shit.

You lift his head up, looking up at him. He looks down at you and bites his lip, his eyes and body relaxed, his bulge pressing up against your thigh. You stroke it a little, holding his neck gently, kissing him. You reach up and lick one of his horns. He melts into you, releasing all previous tension... (not that there was much, anyway.) You look him in the eye.

“Are you ready for this? Are you sure you want me to?” You were just being fucking considerate. Fuck.

He grips onto you wrist gently. Holds eye contact. “There’s nothin a motherfucker wants more right motherfuckin now, Karbro.” He gives his signature grin, assuring you that it’s okay. Okay, shit, you were just a little nervous. You’ve never done this, before, either. Well, not like this, anyway. But lust overcomes any insecurity you once had and replaces it with confidence as you grip onto his waist and rub up against his nook again. Fuck off, you can do this shit.

Purple secretions drip down onto your bulge, and you push him backwards, roughly, (but not enough to injure him,) so he’s laying on his back. He doesn’t fight you. You get on top of him, and kiss down his neck to his stomach. He moans and grips your hair, rubbing your nubby horns. You move your hands down and rest your claws into his thighs, licking his bulge , sucking the tip into your mouth for a few moments. He tries hard to not squirm. You look up at him and then bite his inner thigh. You can feel his nook dripping. Damn. You lick it. It tastes kind of sweet, but it’s probably from all the Faygo this idiot drinks. Kind of grapey, with a hint of... ginger? And a little salt... doesn’t sound too good, but it tasted... kind of exquisite. You eat his nook out a little, and he’s trying so hard to stay still. It’s kinda cute.

Shit. Okay. You sit up, and stroke your length, pressing it against his nook. You lift his legs up a little, holding him firmly, as you push inside. It feels tight, but... warm. Wet. Whoa. Okay. Shit.

You hear him moan as you push in deeper and you look at his face as you start to thrust slowly. Fuck. You hear him urge you to go faster. “Don’t be motherfuckin shy...” he says. Ugh. Fuck him. You start to go faster, telling him to shut up while you do so. He stops talking, but he doesn’t shut up.

You can the insides of his nook clenching onto your bulge, demanding more. You look at his face as you start to find a rhythm, and it just comes naturally. Your hands are holding just above his feet as you fuck into him, and he’s looking up at you with lidded, sultry eyes, his mouth twisted into a grin, his hands above his head, gripping onto the soft floor. Red combines with purple in such a marvelous color. You grip onto him harder, thrusting into him harder, letting out moans of pleasure. He looks so pretty beneath you. His hair all tangled and his eyes looking up at you, this angle was really suiting for him. His smeared facepaint looked kinda hot. What the fuck.

He bites his lip as he lets out pretty little moans, letting you dominate him, the look on his face was pure ecstasy. He was blushing a deep shade of purple... It made you want to fucking blow your load all over his face while he sucked the rest out, choking on it. You fuck him harder and you feel his nook tighten. You can’t fucking stop yourself, you grip into his waist as he wraps his legs around you, pulling you in further, moaning lustfully as you release inside of him, your fluids combining into a beautiful magenta-like color, and leaking out of his nook. He’s breathing hard, his chest rising and falling, his leg twitches once. You pull out slowly, and kiss his leg all the way down to his thigh and taste the combination of yourselves, running your tongue along his dripping nook. His hands find their way into your hair as he strokes your horns again. You pull yourself up towards his face and kiss him hard, his mouth opening for yours immediately, your tongue grazing his with the remnants of your cum still on your tongue. He seems to like it, because he chuckles and pulls you down into him as he swallows and hungrily kisses you for more.

“You’re filthy... we should clean up.” You whisper into his ear. He wraps his legs around your waist and pulls you down on top of him, kissing your neck. “In a minute, bro... gotta savor the moment...”

You roll your eyes but wrap your arms around his neck as he holds you.

“So... I heard it’s awkward to ask this question, according to humans, or whatever. But... was it good, uh... was it what you were expecting?”

Gamzee chuckles and then nips at your ear.

“It was motherfuckin magical... miraculous as fuck... and I swear it was better then I motherfuckin all up and expected...” he nuzzles into your shoulder. “You’re really good at it, bro... you made me feel so motherfuckin good...” he presses a little kiss to your shoulderblade as his legs tighten around you. He lets out a soft moan through a closed mouth, letting you know just how much he enjoyed it. You give in and lay on him, nuzzling into his neck.

“Fuck yeah, you liked it. Fucker.” You say confidently. He chuckles and kisses your forehead.

“Fuck yeah, I did.”

“Seriously, though, fuckwad, we need to go wash this fucking mess off. Get the fuck up.” You nudge him. He groans, but he sits up, and you sit up, too, finally being released from his legs. It felt pretty nice, though. Whatever.

You stand up, your legs a little wobbly, but fuck off, you’re fine! You hold your hands out, and he lets you help pull him up. You wrap an arm around his waist as you walk to his ablution room. As he walks by the counter, he sticks his fingers into a pie he left out and licks it off his slick digits with a smirk. You groan and shove his face away from yours. You open the door and pull him in, and then look up at him. You loved how pretty his horns were.

You walk over to the tub and turn the faucet on, feeling his eyes on you as you bend over. You turn around, your face flushing red.

“Can you stop staring at me for one second, you fucking pervert?” You shout angrily.

He chuckles and walks closer to you. “No motherfuckin way, Karbro.”

You grab him and shove him into the tub. Fucker. You get in after he sinks down into it, still looking at you. He winks as a drop of sopor drips down his chin. Fucking gross idiot. You wipe it off his chin with your thumb and he snakes his tongue out to lick it seductively off your finger. You blush again and look away.

He grazes his teeth along your thumb before he pulls away and grins at you.

“Thanks, Karbro.”

“Whatever... no big deal.”

You wash his back as he purrs. You trace the scars, you gently scrub. You liked taking care of him, even if it was work. He peeks back at you and grins at you, leaning into you. Yep. Definitely worth it.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Dave drama and a little flashback memory. :o)

You wake up to a sleeping Gamzee, resting peacefully, his fingers interlocked with yours, just resting in his boxers. Same for you. You sigh. What the hell are you doing? You’re acting domestic and shit. Your life was like a fucking romcom right now. Nothing wrong with that though, you supposed. You open your husktop. You gulp at the message you received.

TG: hey karkat, can we talk? i just wanna explain some shit

Ugh. Dave. Why was he pestering you again? You literally told him to fuck off. You message him back.

CG: WHY DO YOU WANT TO TALK AND WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANNA SAY

He responds really quickly.

TG: i just wanna talk. in person.

You growl a little, and Gamzee stirs. He sits up next to you, rubbing his eyes.

“Hey, Karbro... what the motherfuck is up?” He leans over and looks at your husktop. He sees Dave in the chat. He looks at you, raising an eyebrow.

“Everything cool, bro?”

“Uh... yeah. It’s just Dave, pissing me off again.”

You type back.

CG: I DON’T REALLY WANT TO.

TG: come on man, it’s really no big deal, i just have shit to say that i can’t say on here. can we meet up or what?

You become visibly annoyed. Gamzee takes notice, and gently snatches your husktop before you can react.

“What the fuck.” You say, but he’s already fucking typing. Ugh. You put your hands in your face angrily.

CG: hEy BrO, hE sAiD hE dOeSn’T wAnT tO. ReSpEcT a MoThErFuCkEr :o)

TG: whoa dude seriously  
TG: you’re having your dumb clown boyfriend talk for you now? why

You look over and read the conversation. Goddamn it.

“Gamzee, give me back my husktop.”

He just growls low in his throat.

“I got this, Karbro...”  
He types more but you reach over him and backspace it all and then start typing. He lets you.

CG: OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, STRIDER, DON’T TALK SHIT ABOUT GAMZEE, ONLY I GET TO CALL HIM MY DUMB CLOWN BOYFRIEND. SECOND, I TOLD YOU I DON’T WANT TO TALK TO YOU

TG: but dude, like, it’s chill

Gamzee starts typing. You sigh in frustration. Why won’t Dave just leave you alone?

CG: wHeN a MoThErFuCkEr SaYs No, tHeY mEaN nO, BrO  
CG: I sUgGeSt yOu bAcK tHe FuCk uP  
CG: dOn’T wAnT nO mOtHeRfUcKeRs gEtTiN aLl uP aNd MoThErFuCkIn HuRt iN tHiS BiTcH  
CG: hOnK :o)

TG: dude seriously why do you type like that it’s so fucking retarded and i’m not trying to talk to you, i’m trying to talk to karkat so just cut the overprotective shit for five seconds and let him have some personal space.  
TG: also you don’t fucking scare me dude, you’re just a clown, big deal.

Gamzee gets a little more tense. You sigh again and read what they’re saying.  
Are they seriously fighting right now? You facepalm.

CG: nOnE oF yOuR mOtHeRfUcKiN BuSiNeSs wHaT wE aLl Up AnD bE dOiN, bRo  
CG: rEfRaIn fRoM mOtHeRfUcKiN tElLiNg uS hOw tO dO ShIt, I gIvE mY KaRbRo aS mUcH sPaCe aS hE fUcKiN wAnTs :o)  
CG: AlL’s I’m AsKiN oF yOu, MoThErFuCkEr, iS tO lEaVe a BrO aLoNe, iF hE aLl uP aNd aSkS yOu To. :o)

TG: well whatever you don’t scare me, i need to talk to him, asshole  
TG: but whatever dude, i’ll catch you later

Gamzee growls. You take your husktop back. Ugh.

CG: WHATEVER, STRIDER. ARROGANT PRICK. I DON’T WANT TO. END OF STORY.

TG: oh hey you’re back. listen, i’m going to be around, so, you should come hang out. i wanna say some shit to you. later

You facepalm and close your husktop, sighing for a prolonged period of time. No matter how many fucking times you said you didn’t want to fucking hang out...

“It’s like he is oblivious to the word no, or something. I mean... what the fuck, right? He just keeps insisting I meet up with him. I legitimately thinks he’s more pan rotted than you, Gam.”

Gamzee doesn’t really laugh. Just nods. “Is this... gonna be a motherfuckin... problem?” He asks, shuffling his hands.

“No. Don’t worry about it. It’s fine. I don’t even fucking care. You wanna go somewhere?”

Gamzee just looks at you, and then nods. “Sure, bro.” He wraps an arm around you and pulls you in close to him. You bury your face in his chest and breathe in his scent.

“Did I ever tell you how beautiful you look without your clown paint?”

He chuckles.

“I mean, not that you look bad with it, goddamn it.”

“It’s alright, Karbro. I know you’re down with the clown.” 

You shove him playfully. “Fucking moron. I love you.”

“I love you, too, my magical little star monkey. Red for you as your beautiful color.” He didn’t really make you nervous when he mentioned your mutant colors anymore. You knew he wouldn’t hurt you. He was creepy, and kind of scary sometimes, sure, but he was tender with you. He kisses your forehead and wraps both of his arms around you protectively, rubbing his scent glands in your hair. You purr and rub his back in circular motions while he reaches up and rubs your nubby horns, emanating a soft moan out as he grazes his fingers tenderly over the tips. He leans down and kisses each horn a few times. Then he plants a kiss in your hair and nuzzles you more. Making sure his scent is all over you. You do the same to him. Fuck Dave. You didn’t really hate him, really, but he needed to learn that you weren’t going to ever go for him. When people continuously seemed to be oblivious to things that you say, things that you let them know are PERFECTLY CLEAR... ugh. Whatever. Fuck him. You purr louder and nuzzle into your moirail, uh, matesprit, you mean... damn. You liked that. But you groan inside. Why this juggalo idiot?

You lift your face up to his and kiss him on the lips, not worrying about getting facepaint on you. You really admired how cute he was naturally. He had a few purple tinted blemishes. You knew that. But it was somehow endearing and you liked that he wasn’t completely perfect. The scars along his face were more prominent when he wasn’t wearing clown paint. They didn’t make him ugly, though. You trace your fingers along them. Crazy ass.

You nuzzle into him again. “Hey, Gam.”

“What is up, my sweet lil motherfucker?”

“I’m thinking about Crabdad again.”

“Oh...” he holds you tighter.

“I just miss him. I don’t really know how to deal with this emptiness inside me. I mean, he was a fucking asshole, sometimes, but he was...”

“Your dad. Yeah, I know.” He looks at you with this protective, loving look in his eye, and kisses your forehead, his lips soft as a butterfly’s wings.

“Yeah. Fuck him for fucking leaving me.” You let out a couple tears. You hated getting all sappy but GODDAMN IT, this shit hurt.

“Hey, hey, now, my precious lil motherfucker... my palebro, my moirail, my best bro, my matesprit, my love.” He lifts your chin up and kisses you gently. You wrap your arms around him and cry. And him calling you “my love” isn’t goddamn helping, fuck. He snuggles you and makes you feel warm, even though he was always so cold. You let your tears make a wet spot on his bare skin, pooling into his collarbone before they roll down his chest, leaving three light red little marks on his dark silver skin, that drip down onto his stomach. He pulls you into his lap and wraps his legs around you and kisses your neck gently.

“It’s okay, best friend. It’s okay...” he shooshes you, and rubs your hair in soothing strokes. You kiss his collarbone, and taste your own salty tears. This felt so romantic, you start crying even more. He was here for you, and you were there for him, and you’ll be fucking DAMNED if anything tries to come between you two. You love your fucking weird clown. You rub your scent glands on his chest, kissing his collarbone still. Very gently. You take in deep, soft breaths, trying to calm down. He leans down and catches your jaw with his teeth, softly, before he presses a kiss to the very delicate area. You shiver and let out a soft moan, melting into him. He continues to kiss down your neck, wrapping around you tighter, pulling you closer. He trails his tongue down to your collarbone, and nibbles at it gently, before he comes back up and kisses you below your ear, next to your jawline. You wrap your legs around him and purr for him. He grins.

“See, it’s okay, Karbro. I’m here.” He nuzzles his head against yours, his horns bumping you softly. You reach up and rub them.

“Thank you...” you let another tear slip out, and he catches it with his thumb and wipes it away. Then he kisses you where the tear fell. You blush deeply, a dark shade of red.

“You’re so fucking sappy, it’s disgusting.” You kiss him, your lips pressing together. He smiles into the kiss, and you swoon.

You always wanted to be in love, but you never really thought it would be with him. Of course, you always had a slight attraction to him. But, most of the time, you just shoved it away and got frustrated about it. Locked it up in a little box and tucked the key away, kicked the box for good measure. Fuck that box.  
You remember one time, you were at a party. You were about 16 in human years. You didn’t really want to go, but you remember Vriska teasing you about being a party pooper and a buzzkill, so you were thinking... “fuck her, I’ll show this spider bitch.” So you begrudgingly went to this stupid fucking party. You don’t remember who even threw it. But you remember this tiny little walkway to get in. And you had to squeeze past some people. You brushed up against some random people just to get in. It was uncomfortable as fuck. Ugh. But you figured what the fuck, right? So you finally squeezed past, and then turned a corner. You could hear music and you saw some flashing lights, so you assumed that was the party. You remember you were in an awkward stage, “puberty” or whatever. You were having all these confusing feelings, and pressure on you to find a girl to shack up with or whatever. Vriska called you a pussy and a faggot. It pissed you off. So you found a fucking corner to stew in. You watched in annoyance as trolls and humans alike were dancing and throwing shit, acting like complete imbeciles. You remember Dave there, staring at you from across the room, even with his stupid shades on. You could tell he was looking at you. It made your heart race, but kind of in an anxious way. You looked away and prayed he didn’t come over.  
Then, you look over to the left, and you just stare. You see Gamzee with a couple other trolls, and a female human, and they’re all looking at him, daring him to “take the substance.” It looks like a weird straw thing attached to some type of tube? It had this weird colored liquid in it. One of the humans called it “beer.” You just watch him, the way he grins, and says “whatever, motherfuckers. I can do this shit in my sleep.” You roll your eyes. Idiot. You watch as he sticks the straw thing in his mouth, and chugs the liquid down, fairly quick. You see some beer drip out of his mouth and onto his shirt as he finishes and he throws it at some random troll with purple hair.

“Your turn, motherfucker!” And the purple haired troll huffs at him.

“Maybe I don’t want to!” You hear him say. You watch still, as Gamzee urges him on, and the human is grabbing the tube and cracking open a can and pouring it into it. The purple haired troll huffs again, dramatically, before he takes the elongated straw and presses his mouth to it. You watch Gamzee’s face contort into a wicked grin as he sits back against the sofa. A girl is sitting next to him, and she whispers something to him. He grins again. He looks over at you, and you avert your eyes, grabbing a drink and stiffly leaning up against a wall. You see Dave is still looking at you. You see him try to make a move toward you, but then he stops for some reason. Thank Gog. You’re feeling really uncomfortable. Then all of a sudden, you feel a shoulder brush against yours, the smell of cologne and beer wafting into your nostrils.

“Hey, motherfucker.” Gamzee says, relatively close to your ear. You see Dave still looking at you, and you look up at Gamzee. You felt a tingly feeling inside as you saw how tall he had gotten. His eyes were a beautiful shade of purple, and his hair and grin and horns made your heart skip a beat for a short moment. You casually, and with a slight hint of annoyance, speak. “Uh... hey, fuckass. What’s up.”

He gets closer to you. Uh...

“Just chillin, bro. Feelin all the miracles.” His eyes brighten, and he moves his hands around in the air. “Wanna join us? Heheh...”

“Uh, not really, you big sack of shit. Also, you smell fucking weird. What’s up with you and miracles?”

He just laughs and rests his arm up by the wall, close to your head. “Miracles is what’s all motherfuckin around us, bro... want me to show ya some? You gotta let loose once in a while, Karbro.”

“Actually, most things in life are fucking stupid and pointless and not worth the praise you’re giving them.” You sip the drink, casually.

It just makes him laugh. “Man, nah... they’re all around us. Lemme show ya.” He grabs your hand and you freeze up a little. You weren’t really sure why. But soon you’re letting him lead you through a darker room, before he comes to a door. You cross your arms.

“Are you fucking drunk, or what?”

He grins. “May be a lil tipsy. But don’t worry, Karbro, I’ll protect you if any motherfucker tries to all up n attack us.” He winks at you. You roll your eyes.

“You fucking retard, I don’t need you to protect me. Also, I’m pretty sure they’d win. You’re a little more than tipsy, I’m sure.”

He opens the door and pulls you outside. Not too chilly. It was kind of nice, actually. The breeze felt nice on your face. You realized he was still holding your hand. You pull it away. He doesn’t care, though.

He takes you behind the house, by a little shed, and then he points up at the sky.

“Bro. Check it. Fuckin miracles.”

You roll your eyes and look up.

Huh.

Stars littered the sky, and the moon was green. It was all glowing so brightly. You look over at him, his face in a drunken daze, his stupid stoner grin plastered over his dumb, painted face. 

“Bro... appreciate the little things in life, bro... everything’s a miracle if you look hard enough at it. You just gotta let out that negative aura, crampin your style, fuckin up your shizznits...” he starts laughing.

You facepalm. “Oh my God, why am I even out here with you right now? Remind me why I let you con me into this? You’re seriously mental, you know that?”

His teeth gleam in the moonlight as his eyes shine through the darkness, piercing into you. “Heh. Yeah, I know, that, bro. But ain’t all of us a lil kooky, hm?”

You gulp and look back up at the stars.

“Yeah. Whatever, bulgelicker. ...this is kind of nice, though.” You lean up against the shed, next to him. He looks down at you.

“See? Motherfuckin miracles.” He starts to rap. Terribly. Almost like he’s just trying to be goofy. Because no one could be this bad and be serious. Remembering it was honestly painful. Literally made you feel like it killed some brain cells. “Well lemme tell you bout them miracles, lemme put this shit in yo thinkpan, cuz the way you lookin at the motherfuckin stars, makin motherfuckers feel like they on Mars, yo, ain’t never been to Mars, but I hear they got cars, and that miraculous stardust got the blood pumpin, gushin and squirtin and plumpin, motherfuckin humpin the air like a... somethin somethin... lemme me tell you bout them miracles, brother, I feel them while I’m fuckin your mother, and ain’t nobody feel em better, cuz shit gets bitches wetter than a spaghetti platter, yo.” 

You laugh, a bit agitated still, but you manage out a small laugh. It made no sense, and it was the dumbest thing you’ve ever heard.

“That was the fucking worst thing my ears have ever witnessed. How does your pan even work at all with all that retardation lodged in there?”

He chuckles. “....miracles.”

Oh, my gog. “Okay, okay, I get it. Fuck. You’re even dumber than I remember.” You sigh. “You, uh... got really tall.”

He chuckles.

“And you’re still the shortest motherfucker I’ve ever seen.”

It hasn’t been that long, really. A year or two, in human years. You don’t really know why you fell out, maybe because he pissed you off or something. You don’t even remember. All you knew was, there he was, again. And you didn’t mind his company. You look up at the stars some more before you go back inside, wondering why this idiot chose to come hang out with you in the first place. As you walk back inside, you see Vriska and a few of her friends snickering at you, shouting gay slurs at you. Gamzee pays no mind to it, just flips them off and grabs a Faygo. A red Faygo. You sigh as he offers you a sip. You push it out of your face. You look up and see Dave. He looks over at you. Still watching. What the fuck. You were about to go over there and beat his ass. You look up at Gamzee again.

“Wanna try this beer thing out?” He asks. You roll your eyes.

“If it affects me like how it affects you, no thanks, I’d rather have my wits about me. I don’t even understand how you’re alive, you’re so fucking oblivious. Someone could try to cull you at any moment and you’d just sit there for five seconds trying to process what’s even going on. And then by the time you do, you’re already dead.”

“Hey, there’s a motherfuckin difference between oblivion and just lettin loose.” He nudges your shoulder teasingly. “I got my aware on good enough. And I can tell that you’re tense, bro. Just stay with me. I won’t let no motherfucker get to you.” He looks over at Dave. Oh, shit. How did he know?

You grumble grumpily. “Fine, whatever, Gamzee. How the fuck...”

You were going to ask how he knew Dave was staring at you, but then you stopped.

“Hm?”

“Nothing, man. Let’s just go somewhere. Away from this general vicinity.”

“Yeah, you got it, bro.” He wraps his arm around you shoulder, and looks back at Dave, and you think he was glaring at him. But then he was out of sight, and his attention was back on you. He led you down this hallway, away from other people, grabbing a drink as he moved along.

“Where’d they even get that stuff?” You ask, your arms crossed as you look up at the taller troll.

“Uh, this shit?” He motions to his cup. “I think the humans brought it, maybe Vriska’s friends. I don’t really motherfuckin know. But it’s kinda motherfuckin good... wanna sip?” He gives you a dumb, drunken smirk, putting his cup in your face, doing that dumb eyebrow thing.

You huff angrily, letting him KNOW he’s annoying. But you grab it begrudgingly and take a sip. Ugh. It tasted like fermented prune juice.

“Why the fuck would you ever drink this shit?!” You almost spat it out but you swallowed it, slightly curious about its effects. It was just a sip. Gamzee chuckles and squeezes your shoulder. 

“Bro... for the feeelings it be all up and givin to me...” he laughs and then leads you to a room where no one else is. You walk past a couple more people, and then boom. You’re in the room. It’s dark, but he stumbles over to a light thing. You didn’t know what it was. But when he turned it on, it was fucking blue, green, and purple. Shifting between those colors. It looked really cool, but you sighed.

“Gamzee, why’d you lead me in here, fuckstain?”

He looks to you and motions for you to come sit by him on a bed, a window right over top of it, his back resting against the wall, his demeanor chilled, and his foot prodding up on a pillow. He grins over at you. You growl, but go over to him and sit by him. You cross your arms again.

“What’s the deal, idiot?”

He pulls out a bag of some green shit in a pipe. He unzips the bag and pulls out the pipe, and pulls out a lighter.

“Check this shit out. One of Vriska’s human friends gave it to me.”

“What the fuck is that?”

“It’s weed, that’s what the humans call it. Wanna try it with me?” He lights it, and puts the piece up to his face, soon there’s smoke going through it, and you watch in awe and annoyance as he looks over at you without moving his head, and slowly exhales a big ass cloud. You really didn’t want to do it, but a part of you kind of did. You missed Gamzee. And you were going through a dumb teen phase.

You grab the pipe with trembling hands as you see his purple and yellow gaze stare into your soul, even though it was relaxed.

He hands you the lighter. You try to flick it. Several fucking times. It wouldn’t fucking light. You keep flicking it but it won’t go. You get visibly agitated and almost throw it across the room in frustration. “Fuck. What the FUCK! How do you do it? This is fucking stupid.” You growl.

Gamzee laughs and grabs the lighter from you, his hand brushing against yours slowly, for a bit too long, actually. You didn’t think much of it at the time, though. His eyes are filled with a chilled haze. He tells you to hold the pipe up to your mouth. “Alright, now, hold the pipe up to your mouth, lil motherfucker...” the way his voice sounded, was like drugs itself. A little bit of a growl to it, but with a mellow feel all around. Kind of deep, kind of soft. He had a weird voice. You roll your eyes, growl, but do it. He flicks it, and it lights. Wow. Bravo. Fucking douche. Of course.  
You are taken by surprise when he suddenly presses it to the burnt herb in the bowl... you were startled by the way the smoke invaded your lungs. Holy shit. You pull away and cough. You cough so fucking hard. Your eyes sting and you cough, smoke coming out your nose. He just laughs and pats you on the back, reaches over, and hands a drink to you. You sniff it. Just water. You had no idea where he got that. Maybe he brought it when you were walking. Whatever. You drink it down, and throw the cup at the wall when you’ve downed it.

“What. The. Fuck.” You choke out. Your throat kind of burns. And your lungs feel kind of fuzzy.

He just grins widely, his teeth protruding out like razorblades. Damn. He could just rip your throat out right here and no one would even hear you scream.

“Ya like?” He chuckles, his eyes bloodshot, as he takes another hit.

“Fuck. I don’t know. I don’t even know why I agreed to this. Why do I let you do this shit?” You laugh slightly, starting to feel a little lifted.

“Guess I’m just... motherfuckin... charming, Karbro...” he slurs out in a stoned daze.

“Yeah. Charming as a fly to a pile of shit.”

You both laugh.

“Who’s the motherfuckin fly and who’s the motherfuckin pile of shit?” He chuckles, looking at you with one arm resting calmly on the windowsill, close to your head.

“You’re obviously the pile of shit.” You say, looking up at him. His stupid goofy ass grin remains. He licks his lips slightly.

“So that’d make you... the fly.”

“Fuck, I guess so.”

“Flies can’t resist the shit, bro.” He winks at you, blowing some more smoke out of his stupid mouth. You feel yourself blush, but then you growl at him.

“Wow. Smooth, man. Real fucking smooth. You should seriously consider being a comedian. You’re so talented at jokes.” You hoped he understood your sarcasm. He did, but he wasn’t phased by it.

He motions for you to come closer. You hesitate, but he has a way about him. So eventually, you give in, rolling your eyes. He takes in another hit, and motions for you to come close. He grabs you gently by the chin and tells you to open your mouth. You want to say, “no, fuck you! What the fuck are you trying to pull?” But you do it. Which is.... fucking weird. Probably just the weed. He blows the smoke into your mouth, his eyes looking down at your lips, you think. His makeup and his eyelashes look kind of gentle when he’s looking down. You inhale a bit of it, before you turn your head away, coughing.  
You shove him back by the shoulder, warning him that he’s a dumbass.

You look back at him, and you start to feel more high. Wow. Takes effect quickly. “Holy shit, what the hell was that? Why’d you do that?”

“Heh. Yeah, why did ya, Karbro?” He leans back and slouches against the wall. You pull yourself up and stand on the fucking bed. You look down at him and point a finger at him, your claws were kind of sharp, so it was meant to be threatening. “You’re a fuckass. It’s not my fault you have this weird way of getting me to say yes to you! Fuck you and your way of doing shit!” He looks up at you, and starts laughing, his hands on his stomach.

“Bro... Karbro... I missed you, bro. You’re pretty motherfuckin funny sometimes.”

You don’t remember too much else from that night, honestly. All you remember is going into that room, getting stoned with Gamzee, and then walking past some people on the way out, you vaguely remember Vriska sneering at you, the feeling of Gamzee’s hand on your shoulder, as you were guided out the door of the place you were at. He helped you outside, and then offered to help you get home. But you growled at him, and told him you could make it home yourself, thank you very fucking much, fuckass. So he gave you a hug, longer than what you wanted, and his hand lingered on your arm for a second. You looked over and saw Dave. He was walking away, but he turned back to look at you, his hands in his pockets, before he vanished out of sight. It made you feel weird, so you looked back up at Gamzee.

“It was nice seeing you again, nookstain. We should hang out again. Sorry I stopped talking to you.” You look away, folding your arms.

“Ain’t no thang, bro. Ain’t no thang. Missed you too, my brother. So... How about... tomorrow?” He grins at you.

“Sure, whatever.”


	11. Never Be Insecure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the little convo with Dave and reminiscing on that stupid party. **Written in third person this time.** to kind of intertwine their perspectives. <3

“So, Gamzee... why me?” Karkat asks.

“What you be meanin?” Gamzee asks, shuffling his hands slightly. He didn’t really like these kinds of questions. It was a sign of some kind of insecurity, and it made him feel bad because it kinda felt like it was his fault. Why else would he be insecure? Maybe it’s all within himself. Yeah. Probably. Still, it burns his skin when Karkat asks him that. 

Karkat awaits a reply, showing his vulnerable side, a side he really only lets Gamzee see. He really had a hard, crabby exterior, but underneath that crustacean shell there’s soft flesh, and mush. Never thought he’d ever show him, either. It kind of surprised both of them.

Karkat swallowed, and sighed. “Just... fuck, you know what I mean, bulgelicker. Fuck. ...why me? Why was it me, you know? Not like.... Tavros? I mean, that dude and you had like... a connection, right? Fuck, I don’t know.”

Gamzee looks at him, shoves the husktop away, and gently lifts Karkat’s chin up, so he’s looking into his piercing purple and yellow eyes. “You ain’t Tavbro. Tavbro never reciprocated my affections, anyway. Don’t be comparin yourself to that shit.” He places a soft kiss on Kar’s forehead. “It’s you because... fuck, you been my best friend for as long as I can remember, even if we had a little fallout. Feelings were still all up and there, bro. That shit doesn’t just disappear overnight and shit. Yeah, I liked him. A lot. Made me feel all tingly inside, a lil bit. But you’re different. I don’t really know how to be up and explainin this shit, my sweet ass invertebrother. I don’t really know how to get those words outta my thinkpan and press em to the pad of paper that’s this situation and create a pretty little creation. But I do know that when I look at you, I don’t know, bro. I get a lil weak, shit, aight, I get weak as fuckin weak can get, brother, and I just wanna like... hug a motherfucker, and give him forehead kisses,” he places another on his forehead and holds his hands in his, looking him in the eyes. “And let him know his fuckin worth. All up and touch him, breathe him in, cuz daaaayum, you smell fuckin good. I wanna hold him until his pain goes away, and fuckin share my deepest thinkpan’s thoughts with him, while he shares his with me, you feel? Wanna... all up and fuckin... make him feel good...” he leans his face down into Kar’s neck and kisses it, while he strokes one hand up his thigh and finds Karkat’s bulge, squeezing gently. Karkat sighs happily. Fuck yes. This is the shit he wants to fucking hear. This shit is fucking BETTER than a romcom, goddamn it! Fuck yes.

“Wanna fuck you until you see stars, until I have you beggin to the mirthful messiahs. ...Ain’t never felt that way about a motherfucker before. Not this red. This shit is... straight up passion, that I feel for you, my sweetest miracle. Not a damn thing can compare.” Karkat moans at the sounds of his stupid romantic words. Goddamn it if he wasn’t a sucker for that shit. He looks Gamzee in the eyes and and then presses his rough, chapped lips to Gamzee’s more soft, delicate lips. Must’ve been using chapstick, the fucker. It felt electric, like he was floating in the clouds and all that existed was the two of them.

“Fuck you... why do you have to be so full of dumb romantic cheesy crap?” He says grumpily, but Gamzee bites into his neck and it takes all the crabbiness away. “Goddamn it. You piece of shit...” he slowly moves his hands up to Gamzee’s face, gently prying his fangs away from his tender throat. “Fucking shut up and kiss me or I swear I’ll fucking chop your bulge off.” Karkat’s voice is filled with lust, but he lets him know he means business, his body moves closer into Gamzee’s as Gamzee smirks at him and leans into a kiss, Karkat’s hands wandering up to Gamzee’s horns, to give them a squeeze. Gamzee moans, and kisses him more fiercely, biting his bottom lip and pulling at the skin gently, his fangs sinking into his tender flesh, not drawing any blood.

“Always knew you wanted to give em a good squeeze.” He chuckles.

“Shut the fuck up... I’ve already sucked them off, how are you just now saying that?”

Gamzee giggles. “Just popped into my head, bro. Remember you bein all cranky as usual. Such a grumpy little fuckin troll.” He grins and pulls Karkat closer, nipping at his neck.

“You fucking shit. Ugh.” He squeezes them harder, despite his protest. Gamzee’s body shudders against his, his hand wandering up to Karkat’s neck, squeezing gently. “Do it again, bro...”  
He obliges. Karkat squeezes them tighter, and nips at Gamzee’s ear, moaning into it softly.

“You’re pathetic, you know that?” He whispers, snaking his tongue up his earlobe.  
He starts to move his hands upwards, still squeezing. It was really cute how Gamzee submitted to him, gently releasing his neck from his grasp, and pulling him up onto his lap so his bulge grinded against Karkat’s nook. He didn’t force anything whatsoever, though, just grinded a few times. Karkat moves his fingers to the top of his horns, and moves his lips to them, kissing them gently. He had the urge to nip at them, so he did. Gamzee’s body gets more limp, as he leans into him more, purring and moaning softly into Karkat’s ear. Karkat chuckled. Motherfucker.

Gamzee’s arms gently wrap around Karkat’s neck, intertwining and lacing his fingers together so he doesn’t lose grip, planting weak little kisses on Karkat’s shoulderblade. Karkat leans up and licks the tip of a horn, admiring how curvy they were. He thought Gamzee had the prettiest horns out of any troll he’s ever seen. He swirls his tongue around the tip, causing a moan to emanate from Gamzee’s lips, more high pitched than usual. Karkat liked that. Thought it was cute as fuck, but wouldn’t ever admit it. Fuck this idiot.

Gamzee’s teeth gently pressed against Karkat’s neck’s flesh again, biting down softly, his cock twitching underneath Karkat’s nook. Karkat growls and moves to the other horn. “I fucking hate you, you know that, right?” He says softly into Gamzee’s ear. Slides his tongue along the base up to the tip. Gamzee leans his head up and grins goofily and lustfully at Kar’s face, locking eye contact before grabbing his chin and pulling his lips in for a passionate kiss. Karkat squeezes his horns tighter. “Right?” He repeats himself.

Gamzee moans into his mouth as Karkat starts to roll his hips on Gamzee’s bulge. “Y-yeah... I know, my invertebrother. I know... you hate me so fuckin much...”

Karkat grins into the kiss and slips him tongue, stroking and squeezing his horns still, before he slowly releases them, running his hands down his sides to slide his own pants down, the friction causing wetness to gather at his tip... exposing himself, still tangled up in his matesprit’s lips.

“So... to counter your motherfuckin question...” Gamzee moans as he, too, slides his pants off. “Heh. This one’s a doozy.... Why not Dave?” He looks him in the eye, lustfully, playfully, possessively. Karkat growls at him and grips him, pulling him down into him by his neck, their lips inches apart.

“Because, idiot. Dave isn’t you.” He kisses Gamzee passionately again, initiating, his pants rolled down to one leg, pushing himself down onto Gamzee, feeling him inside of him as he growls at him. “Don’t ever ask me that dumb fucking question ever again.”

Gamzee grins, pushing upwards into Karkat, deeper. “Oh, yeah? I’m all up and likin the sound of that.”

Karkat growls at him again, grabbing Gamzee by his chin, claws digging in gently, but his grip was fierce. Tethering him further into him. “You suck, and I hate you. You’re such a stupid ass clown and I loathe your very existence. You are hands down, the dumbest fucking idiot I’ve ever met. But you’re better than Dave. You’ve plagued my mind with the mention of that blonde gremlin. Now make his retarded face leave my mind by fucking me so hard all I see is you.”

Gamzee grins, licking his lips, thrusting up into him as Karkat’s moans filled the room. Nothing but the two of them. “I can do that, best friend.” He growls into his ear as Karkat tightens his grip around his neck. Karkat’s ferocity is just too sweet, so savory, how could he resist the urge but to oblige?


	12. Dream... or a Miracle?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hmmm...  
> (The creepy song playing in the background is Blood Milk & Sky by White Zombie)

It was in your memory. One night when Gamzee came over when Crabdad was still alive. You remember. It wasn’t too long after the party you went to and met up again. Ever since then, you’ve pretty much been hanging out every week.

You also remember when you saw Gamzee make his first kill.

Shadows.

Darkness.

Nothing but the feeling of the night air against your pelt.

It triggered something in your subconscious. You were dreaming. Maybe you weren’t. Who even knew.

Just eeriness...

A creepy song playing in the far distance.

You see the setting where he made his first kill while you were lurking in the bushes. Just watching. Frozen. Paralyzed at the ferocity. A memory manifesting into a dream.

All you can see is the color of other troll’s blood.

You see Gamzee’s figure.

You see a smile on his face.

You see it intertwined with something more fucked up.

Your love for him.

You see images of red.

Your own blood dripping from his mouth.

Your flesh underneath his claws.

You hear his voice in your ear, raspy and full of lust.

It softly, darkly, protrudes it’s way into your ear holes.

“Don’t worry, Karbro.... don’t worry. They can’t hurt you anymore...”

You see another image of death.

You see the images of the bodies he claimed.

You see his bulge in his pants, snaking out at you. You see flashes of the hemospectrum in your eyes. You feel the pressure of him inside of you as he thrusts, causing you on instinct to grasp at his neck, smearing the blood of all the trolls he’s killed onto yourself. You see his eyes flash red, and his teeth as sharp as a razorblade, inches from your jugular vein, poised to strike.

And...

You hear him panting against you, fucking you raw. You moan for him, letting him have control of your body as you gaze through a veil of fear and lust at the bodies surrounding you. Yet somehow, despite all the fear, the lust is more powerful. You reach up and place your hands between his teeth, and he bites into it, causing your red blood to drip down. You smear it on his face as he fucks into you like you’re his salvation. And he licks the palm of your hand, snaking his abnormally long is tongue out at your open wound, urging you to smear more of yourself into him.

“You.... ah... you’re.... ahhh! You’re fucking... diabolical.” You stutter out as he hits your sweet spot... triggers you to smear more of your pretty color onto him, intertwining with the blood of the dead lingering on his skin.

He bites into your neck and holds your body in his hands like you’ll fall away from him if he lets you go.

“You fucking love it.” He growls down at you, thrusting deeper. Your sexual attraction to him intermingling with the fear you felt that night. You didn’t know why you were dreaming this. But your mind kept telling you... DON’T WAKE UP. DON’T STOP.

If you stop, I’ll kill you.

If you stop, I’ll kill myself.

Please don’t let me wake up.

I want to feel it in it rawness. I want you to overcome. I want you to fill me up with fear and then fill me up with something else. If you stop I’ll kill you if you stop I’ll kill you if you stop I’ll kill you -

He shoves you down into the ground, hovering over you, fucking you into the pile of corpses he’s slain. And you enjoy it.

You want more of it.

Stop feeling this way.

Snap out of it.

This is sick.

This isn’t right!

They’re your FRIENDS!

But you don’t care. Not when it’s just you and him. Not when it’s just you and him against the entire universe.

Suddenly you don’t care who’s fucking dead. Fuck them. They don’t fucking matter. They’re useless garbage pails of shit that aren’t even worth the pail. The mothergrub wouldn’t even TAKE their spills. And if she did, they’d all PERISH.

Why is your mind so sexually twisted?

Why do I enjoy it? You wonder....

But you don’t care about that, either. Not when this beautiful highblood troll is on top of you, his horns standing up so tall, the moonlight shining down on them. Not even when he makes a small incision on your stomach to spill more beautiful red. Not when he leans down, still inside of you, pushing in as deep as he can, making damn well sure that you fucking FEEL it, making you moan, making you squirm as his lips, tongue, and sharp teeth collide with the small cut spilling such a beautiful red color.

A painful sting turns to pleasure.

You feel dripping, dripping on your stomach.

You look as hard as you can, seeing that his face is sliced, three gash marks along the length of his cheeks and nose.

Dripping that beautiful purple. Dripping it right into your red. He looks like a fucking demon, his eyes tainted red from the bloodlust, piercing daggers into your very soul without even making direct eye contact, his horns increasing his satanic appearance. He looks like a fucking demon right before you, sucking you dry, intermingling his blood with yours, fucking into you like you’re his little miracle. The most precious miracle he’d ever seen.

His words... manifesting into your head.

You roll your hips upward into him as he snakes his tongue down lower, pulling out of you to pull your legs into his face, eating your nook out like it was his favorite piece of candy.

You reach up to grip at the grass. All you get is a severed limb in your hand.

Still warm.

Still fresh.

And it freaks you out, but somehow you grip into it tighter, because you don’t fucking care at all.

You kind of l i k e it.

You thought this dream was going to be about your sadness.

About your lusus.

About how Gamzee stumbled into your hive, high as fuck on sopor, tripping over Crabdad’s foot.

And he apologized. With such sincerity.

The way he wanted to make a good impression on him.

You could see the hurt in his eyes, the longing for a caretaker.

The sadness.

But no.

That just shifted right out of your mind.

Now you’re getting devoured by a demonic creature that makes you feel so fucking good, it makes you c u m.

What does this fucking mean?

What does this mean?

What does this mean...

Fuck it. Fuck it all. It doesn’t matter when his tongue is moving like that, in and out, up and down, side to side, swirling and sucking. It felt miraculous.

And you can’t believe you even said that word. Even if it was a subconscious thought.

Miracles.

Miracles.

Miracles.

He fucked the sadness out of you. He fucked out your grief. At least in this moment... this lucid, vivid, wet dream.

His mouth opens.

His teeth protrude out of his mouth in a grimace of pleasure.

He licks the blood dripping down this chin from his lips.

Looking at you.

Smirking.

And then... growling fiercely.

“I want you to fucking beg to the messiahs for me, or I’ll cut your neck out and string it up in the trees like some kind of motherfucking... miracle. Yeah. That’s the fuckin word I was all up and looking for! HahaHAHAHAH! Your insides,” he rolls his hips into you, penetrates you again with his appendage, tightness wrapping around the length, “are miraculous. Sweet, tender, juicy... savory. I fuckin up and LOVE how it gets so sOaKiNg WET for a motherfucker. SO FUCKING WET, it’s like it’s my own private ocean, where no seadwellers lie. They’ll never get to feel the breeze of the air of this ocean, they’ll never get to smell it’s salty sweetness and taste it’s wild pleasures. Your depths are deep, my love... DEEPER THAN THE OCEAN I DWELL BESIDE... only mine to swim in. All... FUCKIN... MINE.”

You roll your hips into him harder as he fucks you as hard as he can. You dig your claws into the severed arm you were holding and fucking rip it from the ground and somehow twist it’s fingers around his neck. He looks you in the eyes, and your whole body shivers. He grins as the feeling of build up, tension, and pure carnal lust overdrives your senses. The stare, the powerful stare.... the eye contact made you cum all over his thickness inside of you. He’s still banging into you and you’re seeing stars around his face, it felt like you opened up even more for him to penetrate deeper into you and it was the best feeling you’ve ever felt in your miserable existence. The moonlight that shone so perfectly behind him as his body writhed back and forth into you. All you can think is... beautiful. Just pure beauty, divine.

You look over at the body of the arm you wrapped around his neck. You realized it was red just like you. So red and pretty. Broken shades scattered on the floor. Realization strikes you and you look back at him, fear hanging heavy, chucklevoodoos at the ready. But... Gamzee just gives you a dominant, possessive stare, his lips curling into the most sadistic grin you’ve ever seen. And you tighten around him, seeing only him, forgetting about the body you just saw. You cum again, and this time, you realize fear is pointless and there is nothing to fear. Because he would never hurt you. Ever.

You look around you.

Is this real?

Is this happening?

Or is it a dream?

It has to be a fucking dream...


	13. Chapter 13

(Third person perspective again!)  
—-

Karkat awakens from his wet dream, panting, because Gamzee shook him awake.

“Shit, bro, you fuckin good?”

It takes Karkat a moment to regain himself. That dream made his heart race. His bloodpusher pound. His veins pulsate. He looked over at the troll that used to be his palemate. A troll that is now associated with the reddest feeling he’s ever felt in his life.

Karkat, for once, just stares at Gamzee’s face. Trembles, as Gamzee shooshes him, drawing his closer to his chest, stroking his hair. Shooshes. Paps. But the feeling was still there. Everyone Karkat knew was dead. And the arm...

Gamzee kisses his forehead.

“Hey, love, hey... chill, motherfucker. It’s all good up in this bitch. What’s botherin your thinkpan?”

His voice. It’s so soothing. Karkat thinks... ‘So opposite of the version of him in your dream. Both make you swoon. You’re FUCKED. Fuck this dude.’ Never says it aloud... but...

Gamzee leans his face up, looking questioningly into his eyes. But as he sees Karkat’s, a look of understanding sweeps his body.

Oh.

That.

Fuck.

He had the same fucking dream.

He wouldn’t tell his matesprit, though. That’d probably just freak him out. Gamzee ignores the wetness in his pants, and the visible wetness in his lover’s. For once.

“You... killed everyone.” Karkat stifled out, still in shock.

He holds onto Gamzee tighter. Trembling still. Gamzee is trembling as well.

He knows.

Fuck.

“And... I fucking... liked it.”

Karkat stammers. He looks up at Gamzee. Then shoves him back.

“Was that a fucking dream? It felt so real. Did that fucking happen?”

Gamzee trembles even more. So, naturally, he lifts a trembling hand up to Kar’s cheek, trying not to be offended that he pushed away from him.

He screamed at himself internally for being so clingy. Fuck.

Karkat looks into his eyes. Gamzee returns the gaze.

“I... how did you know I had that dream, too?” Gamzee murmurs.

Internally, a part of Gamzee really enjoyed it. As sickening as it was, it was pure carnal desires. Of the flesh... of his own, of the bodies he killed, of the one he loves... all in different ways. Except... not really much difference between him and Karkat. It was a combination of their flesh together. Intertwining.

Gamzee shooshes Karkat again.

“You... you did? Really? With the blood and guts and everything?” Karkat looks down at his hands. They were clean. Nothing was staining him. Not the red.

“I... I didn’t, bro. I didn’t know. But you were writhing... and I realized I was, too, but I woke up before you.”

Karkat grabs him by the collar of his shirt. “How long did you wait to wake me?”

Gamzee bites his lip before he replies. “Bout... uh... 30 seconds... I think? Did you, uh... what did you see?”

Karkat looks away.

“Nothing else. It was the same as what you saw, right?”

It was an ally of the internals. The hemospectrum, almost. A human. ...If humans counted on the hemospectrum. Red.

“I don’t really... get to knowin... uh, what the fuck you was seein... something else coulda happened in that 30 seconds.” Gamzee scratches the back of his head.

Karkat tightens up.

“Nothing... nothing else, really. Just... the bodies... and... us...”

Why the fuck did he enjoy it?

He looks at Gamzee again. He’s looking at him with such worry in his face. It’s almost adorable, if Karkat wasn’t feeling the same emotion.

Gamzee is the first to break the tension. Or at least try to.

“Hey, Karbro... I ain’t all up and motherfuckin knowin for certain what the shit that fuckin meant... but, fuck... just know I ain’t never gonna make you be in that mirac... uh, I mean, fucked up, eheh, pile of bodies, you got that?”

Karkat looks at him with a hint of suspicion in his eye. Was he about to say “miraculous”?

But the tension eases as Gamzee places another forehead kiss on Karkat.

“Yeah... I know. Fuck. You better fucking never dare to, fuckstain.” Karkat lets Gamzee pull him into a hug.

“I promise, my brother. I promise. Won’t never fuckin DREAM of it.”

Karkat sighs. “I know. I know. You love me. Only me, right?”

Gamzee tightens around him, but softly. He kisses him tenderly on the lips. A smooch. He grins just as tenderly, to let his love know how deep his affections lie. “Mmm, yeah, bro. Fuck. I love you more than my fuckin pies. And those little miracles really be makin a motherfucker feel good as shit, you feel?”

Karkat’s tension lessens drastically. He wouldn’t forget about the dream, but it was just a stupid dream. This was real.

“Okay. You’ve made your point, numbnuts. I understand you fucking love me because I’m fantastic, who wouldn’t fucking love me?”

Gamzee giggles at him. “Hell yeah, brother. Who fuckin wouldn’t?”

Karkat rolls his eyes and sighs heavily. “Most trolls. Gog, you’re thick.”

Gamzee giggles some more. “Yeah, thick in the dick.”

Karkat blushes red and growls at him, shoving him back, but Gamzee’s grip holds him in place. “Gog, you’re fucking impossible. Why can’t you get your stupid head out of your bulge for five seconds? This was a serious conversation!”

Gamzee laughs harder and strokes Karkat’s hair some more, rubbing his little nubby horns. “You know, bro, just bein my mirthful self. Clownin around.”

“Ugh, yeah, I can see that. Fuckass.”

Karkat nuzzles into him, growling softly.

“You‘re such a cute little motherfucker, damn. Been all up and sayin this for a fuckin while now but how’d a brother ever get so lucky?”

Karkat growls again. “Stop being so cheesy, idiot. For real, this is serious. And yeah, you’ve mentioned that more than once.”

Gamzee giggles and pulls Karkat’s shirt up unexpectedly to lean down and blow a raspberry. Karkat kicks him in the shin by surprise and screams as Gamzee grabs onto his stomach and pulls him down onto the human bed they have in the hive. It was soft. They still preferred to sleep in the recupercoons, but this shit was squishy and didn’t leave a mess. No need to be changing clothes. John suggested it, because of course he did. The imbecile. But they both had to admit it was pretty cozy. 

Karkat struggled to get back up and he was writhing beneath Gamzee as he got on top of him and continued to fucking blow raspberries. Then, he started to tickle him. Karkat fucking lost it and started laughing, still fighting him to stop, pushing up at him to shove him away, which came to no avail.

“You’re no match for the fuckin tickle hands, Karbro, they be makin their rounds and they’re fuckin targeting your ass this time. Get fuckin prepared for this shit cuz it’s comin in full motherfuckin swing, bro.” Gamzee was trying to cheer Karkat up and making him laugh was such a relief. It made his heart flutter.

Between stifles of laughs and growls, Karkat manages to let a few words slip from his quavering lips, “fuck you, fucking stop it! Oh my GOG THIS ISN’T FUNNY, STOP, HAHAHAHA! FUCK YOU, GET OFF OF ME, HAHAH! GAMZEE! LET GO, YOU RETARDED SHIT BURGER!”

It was a precious moment to Gamzee. He loved Karkat, deeply, as pure as a newborn meowbeast, as pure as a drop of fresh honey before it hits the ground. As pure as the sounds of the ocean sways, the moonlight dancing upon the waves. He loved the ocean.

It feels like it’s been forever since he’s seen Karkat smile, feels like forever since he has heard his laugh. It was like a melody strumming all the perfect notes inside his fuzzy thinkpan.

Karkat looks up at Gamzee and takes the opportunity to nip at his wrist, trying to get him to stop. But the tickles keep fucking coming and he eventually just keels over on his side and tries to protect himself, holding his sides strongly.

“No. Fuck you. Fuck your stupid hair. Fuck your face. Fuck your everything. Fuck your entire being. Fuck your dumb clown shoes, fuck your speech patterns, and fuck your beliefs. I am so done with you right now.” Karkat mumbles. Gamzee laughs and lays on top of him, breathing in his ear.

“C’mon, Karbro... lighten the fuck up, motherfucker. That was miraculously fun and you loved the shit out of it.”

“You and your miracles.” Karkat huffs, but leans his face up towards Gamzee’s and pins his ears back, softly kissing Gamzee’s lips, closing his eyes, still perched on his side, the weight of his matesprit on top of him.

Gamzee softens up and stops torturing Kar’s sides completely, pinning his ears back as well, a sweet gesture. They softly kiss and Gamzee lets out a soft moan.

“Fuckin love you.”

Karkat wraps his arms around his neck.

“Fuck you... I love you, too.”

Gamzee smiles into another soft kiss, enjoying the scent of Karkat beneath him. He smelled like baked goods right now. It made his mouth water.

Karkat feels his husktop prodding at his arm and he slides it away from him and off the bed. It was such a bother and he didn’t want to be fucking bothered. He was about to wrap his legs around Gamzee’s torso, when he heard a peculiar sound. A fucking knock on the door. Who the hell would be here right now? Gamzee stiffens slightly, looking back.

“What the fuck?” He growled softly. “Normally don’t up and get visitors.”

Karkat gently pushed Gamzee off of him, looking at him with an annoyed look in his eye. Because seriously? Gamzee laughs in agreement.

Karkat gets off the bed, straightens his shirt out and pulls his pants up since they were sagging a little low. “I got it.” He said, and Gamzee just sits there in a daze.

Karkat grumbled in annoyance as he approached the door. Without looking straight at the figure, he opens the door and growls out, “we’re not looking for whatever it is you’re selling, or whatever the fuck you want, so fucking go away. I was fucking busy in there? So... fuck off.” Karkat rolls his eyes and then looks up.

It’s Dave.

Of course it is.

“Hey, dude.” He says, his lips curling into a slight closed-mouth grin. You know, to seem cool.

“Ugh... seriously, man? What the fuck do you want? In case you haven’t noticed, I was ignoring your dumb messages you sent me for a reason. What the fuck went through your dumb thinkpan to think, ‘oh hey, let’s go to fuckin see him then, because obviously if he’s ignoring my texts, he really wants to see me!’ You’re a fucking genius, seriously. I’m surprised you aren’t the leader of your race of humans. You’re clearly the fucking smartest of them all.”

Karkat narrows his eyes at him. Can’t even see his stupid eyes with those shades. What the hell was he so afraid of, anyway? The mysterious facade of the shades pissed him off.

“Look, dude. I just really need to talk to you. I already told you that. Why can’t you just let me say what I have to say so I stop getting up your tight little ass?”

Karkat grimaced.

“Don’t mention my ass and it’s tightness, Strider.” He facepalmed.  
“Look, I’m fucking busy right now. Get your dumb blonde ‘ooo I’m so scared of confrontation I hide behind my shades to appear calm and collected when really I’m just a pussy’ ass the fuck out of here. I’m busy with Gamzee.” Karkat was about to shut the door in his face, when he felt Gamzee’s body lean up against his.

“Well, well, well... if it isn’t the motherfucker that’s diggin on my boyfriend.” Karkat can feel Gamzee tense against his body, but his demeanor remained calm.

Dave becomes more visibly tense, too. He groans.

“Ugh. Are you ever not around? Seriously, dude, what’s your deal? Are you guys like attached at the hip or something now?”

Dave saw the way Karkat leaned back into Gamzee. The way Gamzee brushed his torso and chest up against Karkat’s body. How he was taller than him. Karkat was so small. Heh. It was cute. But that clown... pissed him off. He tried not to feel a twinge of jealousy as he sees how one of Gamzee’s hands snakes around Karkat’s waist, how Karkat seems to relish in it.

===> Be Dave.

Fuck. It made you so mad. You hated this. You looked at Gamzee’s hands all over Karkat, mocking you, letting you know about what you can’t have. Flaunting it. Showing his dominance over you. And it fucking burns you inside. You try not to think about how Karkat leans into his touch, but it overpowers your mind. You don’t even want to fucking think about how hard that stupid brainless clown fucks him. Bet Karkat begs for it. You bet he melts into it like it’s the best feeling in the world, wrapping his legs around him while he moans in a wrecked way. And the thought makes you feel sick to your stomach, if you’re gonna be for real here. Gamzee peers into your eyes, and if he was closer, he’d tower over you a little. Man, that douchebag was tall. You remember seeing him strutting his shit with that dumb codpiece of his one time. You don’t remember what was even going on, all you remember is him walking around in that dumb fucking outfit. And you wondered if that was his dick. Is that seriously what Karkat likes? What a fucking douchebag.

You realize you really fucking loathe this Clownfucker. Ugh... wait, Karkat’s a clownfucker. He’s been fucking tainted and soiled by this repulsive asshole. Gamzee growls at you, making you lose your train of thought. Feral bastard.

“You got somethin to fuckin say, bro? Or do you wanna just keep starin at Karbro over here? Actin all stoic... sayin jack shit?” His tone shifts slightly, and it actually creeps you the fuck out. Not that you show it. Because fuck that, you aren’t a pussy. Karkat looks up at Gamzee and reaches up to stroke his cheek. “Shhh...” he says quietly.

It’s sickening.

You back up slightly. Then you look to Gamzee again.

“No. Nothing at all.” 

Gamzee grins at you, the creepiest grin you’ve ever seen... and he fucking strokes his hand over Karkat’s dick, grabbing at his crotch area, looking you in the eye the whole time, licks Karkat’s neck, and then he starts fucking laughing. “Ya like what ya see, eh, Strider?” He starts cackling and Karkat shudders when he grabs his crotch. Seriously, you feel like you’re gonna puke. Then Karkat growls at Gamzee and shoves his hand away.

“What the fuck, Gamzee, fucking stop it.” Karkat snarls at him, he looks pissed off and revolted, but his eyes dilated and there was a slight blush on his face. He punches Gamzee in the arm, still. And looks over at you, growling.

“You need to fuck off right now.” He says, looking you right in the eyes. You scoff.

“Whatever. Why do you let him treat you like that? Seriously, dude, it’s like... animalistic and it’s just fucking gross.” You make an effort to act disgusted. But in a cool way.

Gamzee cackles again. Karkat growls at you, and then strokes Gamzee’s neck to soothe him or something. What, was he really that crazy? Was Karkat afraid of him? Was Gamzee hurting him? You take a step forward.

“You deserve better than this.”

Karkat’s turn to laugh. “You don’t know jack fucking SHIT about anything, Strider! I need you to stop acting like you know everything. Now get the fuck out of here, or I will not hesitate to cut into you with my fucking sickles. I’m TRYING to be formal here, but APPARENTLY, IT’S NOT WORKING. FUCK. OFF.”

Gamzee grins again, and mocks you, swaying slightly. It was unnerving. “Ah, yeah, bro, you better run... don’t wanna all up and get pretty red stains all over those perfect white little clothes... would soil you somethin fierce... don’t want that, do we?” He had this maniacal look in his eye, and it was fucking terrifying. This guy was batshit insane. Why in the fucking HELL was Karkat attracted to him? And... was he threatening to kill you? Jesus fucking Christ. You back away slowly, still eyeing him. Observing him. Watching how he looks you in the eyes the entire time he pulls Karkat into him, and bites into his neck again. Karkat seriously lets out a MOAN of PLEASURE at that before he scolds him again. Karkat stares you down angrily, menacingly, but what was more menacing was how Gamzee smiled at you, waving at you slowly, his bony fingers and claws making it look like something out of a fucking horror movie.

You decide to bail. Fuck this. Next time.

You gotta get him when he’s alone. When that creepy clown isn’t around to be his fucking bodyguard. He was doing something to Karkat. You just knew it. He acted different when he was around him. And what was up with him shooshing him like some sort of angry child or baby or something? To get him to calm down? From what? You didn’t even do anything. You were literally just trying to fucking talk to the guy. You were chill as a fucking ice cold beer on a Sunday afternoon after daddy smacked mommy across the face and then chugged that shit down. So what was the deal, seriously?  
You shiver as you replay the images in your head of him grabbing Karkat’s bulge and licking his neck while looking right at you. Piercing you with his horrifying gaze and smiling while he did it. Letting you know that Karkat belonged to him, in the most stupid, animalistic way possible. He fucking got off on that harder than the first time a boy discovers his weiner can get erect and feels himself blow a load, such a new feeling it blows the kid’s mind. ...What an absolute psychopath.

\- - -

Karkat shuts the door and looks up at Gamzee’s face, twisted and full of rage. He sighs and strokes his face again. Gamzee glances down at him, and there’s... a tinge of malice in his gaze. But it quickly vanishes when he meets Karkat’s eyes. Karkat shooshes him again, and growls at him. He slaps him across the face, and shouts at him for being such a tool. Then he pulls him down into a heated kiss. Gamzee groans into his mouth, ignoring the anger he felt, and the surprise of the slap across his face. “God, you make me so angry...” Karkat breathes out, his lips hungrily devouring Gamzee’s. “You’re such a complete fuckwit. A fucking crazy ass idiot with a brain the size of a walnut. I swear to GOD. Fucking take your clothes off. Right fucking now.” Karkat pushes him into a wall, aggressively pulling Gamzee’s shirt off.

Gamzee grins. “So ya up and liked it, huh?”

Karkat growls up at him. “Shut up.” He throws his shirt away and presses his body into Gamzee’s. “Fuck you, you stupid clown. Shut the fuck up.”

Gamzee grins even wider. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

Smug.

Karkat hates it. Hates it so much that he kisses him again, not even thinking about the dream, or Dave.

He grumbles out, “damnit, I think I have a problem here.”

Gamzee looks into his eyes, a slight frown taking place. Nobody likes a sad clown. Karkat looks right back at him.

“Why the fuck do I like you so much? Goddamn. That’s the fucking problem. It pains me to say this, but... I think I fucking.... like... REALLY have a thing for you. I pity you, I’m flushed as fuck for you and I hate you so much.”

Gamzee just smirks.

“Ugh. Fuck you.”


End file.
